Philippe, Philippe Albert, everyone knows his name

[Klippybo]

PHILIPPE ALBERT IS APPOINTED AS THE NEW MANAGER OF NEWCASTLE UNITED

Newcastle United today announced the identity of their new manager and being Newcastle United, they have stunned the footballing world by appointing someone completely unexpected - their former centre half - Philippe Albert.

Philippe started his career in his native Belgium with Charleroi before moving onto Mechelen where he won the Belgian Golden Shoe and a move to Anderlecht. While at Anderlecht he won 2 league titles, made his debut for Belgium and impressed at the 94 World Cup as he scored the winner against Holland and a stunning goal against Germany.

After the World Cup he moved to Newcastle United for $2.6m where he joined the team dubbed "The Entertainers" and he got a reputation as a maverick defender who was immense going forward but suspect doing his job in defence. His finest moment was the final goal in the 5-0 thrashing of Manchester United.
[video=youtube;deXicnyXt3g]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deXicnyXt3g[/video]


He went on to play for Fulham on loan before ending his career with his first club, Charleroi.

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THE FIRST PRESS CONFERENCE

R - Philippe, how do you feel at being appointed as manager of Newcastle?

PA - How do I feel? With my hands of course!! But seriously I am delighted to be given the chance to guide this fine club to where I feel it should be - to the top of the English game and who knows where after that. As a player I came so close to doing it but failed so I intend to be a success as a manager.

R - It has been 15 years since you were involved in a football club - what have you been up to?

PA - I set up a successful fruit and veg company back home in Belgium and I still own it so I have experienced life outside of the football circle. That being said, I have been a TV pundit on Belgian TV so I have kept my eye in so to speak.

R - The club has several French players at the club as you will know. Will you be bringing in an influx of Belgian players?

PA - Not necessarily. I know of some talents there but there is talent already here at Newcastle and I look forward to working with the young starlets such as Adam Armstrong, Ayoze Perez and Rolando Aarons.

R - What do you make of Newcastle's fortunes since you left the club?

PA - Under Sir Bobby Robson the club was in good hands but since then things havent been right. The passion is not there, the free flowing entertaining football is not there. I know the owner has been given a lot of stick and I myself questioned many of his decisions but at the end of the day the club is financially sound, has some good young players and there is hope for the future.


R - What type of manager will you be do you think?

PA - A succcessful one!!! I want my side to play as I did as a player here. With confidence, with flair, with bravado and with bravery. Forward thinking is key. Sure we may concede a few goals but first and foremost I want to entertain those fabulous Geordie fans!!!

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[Mr_Grieves]

Im sure that game finished 4-0 Man Utd?

I've had a go at a Newcastle save in a network game this year. i had De Jong playing off Ferreyra had us in the top 3 at christmas. Added A Ayew & Balanta during the season at bargain prices.​

 

[Munt]

Loved your other stories so I'm looking forward to this one, good luck with Newcastle.

 

[Klippybo]

SQUAD ASSESSMENT

I take over this club with the squad having a strong first XI but with a lack of depth in the ranks - especially in defence. I have appointed Thomas Tuchel (pictured below), who was linked with the job, as my assistant manager while my former teammate Faustino Asprilla has come in as a scout amongst others.

Here is how my staff and I assessed the squad........

PA - Philippe Albert
TT - Thomas Tuchel
AW - Andy Woodman (Gk coach)
PC - Phil Cannon (Head of Youth Development)
PB - Peter Beardsley (Reserve team manager)

GOALKEEPERS

Tim Krul - Rob Elliot

PA - I am happy with what we have here for sure. Tim is a top quality keeper and has been at the club for a while now so knows all about the turbulent times that come with this club. Rob is a decent backup keeper too I suppose.

PB - Jak Alnwick is with me boss but I dont think he will make it at the top level to be honest.

AW - I have to ask boss as I have to know - how do you see my son Freddie progressing?

PA - Well I am no goalkeeping coach but I like what I have seen so far. What do you think Phil? He is in your youth set up.

PC - He can get to the top for sure but will need to bide his time and maybe get loaned out for a season or two.

TT - Dont forget that we have Karl Darlow on loan at Nottingham Forest too and he will join us in the summer.

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DEFENDERS

Fabricio Coloccini - Paul Dummett - Massadio Haidara - Drryl Janmaat - Ryan Taylor - Steven Taylor - Mike Williamson

PA - I am worried here both with the strength and the depth. Very concerning.

TT - Mike Williamson is not good enough for us in my opinion. A postman distributes winning lottery cheques more often than Willo does a good ball. He isnt going to take us to where we want to go. Ryan Taylor also worries me. His set pieces are a strength but he is too slow.

PA - Coloccini is the club captain and will be my voice on the pitch. He is a leader and it is important to keep him onside. I love Steven Taylor's passion for the club and he will be kept on. I will get my Director of Football (John Murtough) and Chief Scout (Graham Carr) to find us a defender or two.

TT - Jamaal Lascalles is another on loan at Nottingham Forest while Davide Santon is at Inter Milan both would have helped us immensely.

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MIDFIELDERS

Rolando Aarons - Sammy Ameobi - Vurnon Anita - Remy Cabella - Jack Colback - Siem de Jong - Yoan Gouffran - Jonas Gutierrez - Gabriel Obertan - Moussa Sissoko - Cheick Tiote

PA - I am happy with what I have got here for sure!! Cheick reminds me of David Batty when I was a player here while Sissoko adds strength and pace and Cabella the trickery and ability to conjure something out of nothing.

TT - I agree. The two Dutchmen, De Jong and Anita are good and worth keeping while Colback, like Steven Taylor, bleeds black and white.

PA - I am most excited about Aarons. It is imperative that we give him regular games to aid his development.

TT - What about the others boss? Gouffran is nothing special but a hard worker.

PA - Gouffs can stay but Obertan can go - talk about a headless chicken!!!! I am not convinced about Sammy Ameobi either and I know it will be unpopular but I just dont see a future for Jonas at the club.

PB - The fans will want Jonas to stay - so be careful with how you deal with him.

PA - Have Nottingham Forest got any more players of ours in midfield - they seem to be collecting them!!

TT - No but Rangers have Shane Ferguson, Gael Bigirimana, Haris Vuckic as well as Remie Streete and Kevin Mbabu. Sylvain Marveaux is back in France on loan.

PA - What has been going on here?????

PB - Dont ask.....

PC - Stefano Broccoli is the best player in the youth ranks boss.

PA - Jeezo. Two clubs have 7 of my players and my top prospect in the U18s is named after a vegetable.

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FORWARDS

Ayoze Perez - Papiss Cisse - Facundo Ferreyra - Emmanuel Riviere

PA - There is enough to work with here I think. Papiss can be a deadly striker when on form while I have high hopes for Ayoze Perez. Facundo I think is a decent player but he somehow never got a look in under the previous regime which begs a question why?

TT - One of footballs modern day mysteries it seems. Hard working boy, decent finisher. We can buy him outright for $6m if you want?

PA - I will see how he plays first. Riviere has me betwixt and between. Is he a headless chicken like Gabby or is he the quick, strong powerful striker that any club wants?

TT - We will have to play him to find out boss.

PB - Adam Armstrong is with the reserves. In my opinion he should be involved when possible as he can go all the way for sure.

PC - I second that.

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[SamPeters]

good luck with Newcastle!

 

[meguel]

How on earth did you get Tuchel to agree to being an Assistant Manager?

TT - No but Rangers have Shane Ferguson, Gael Bigirimana, Haris Vuckic as well as Remie Streete and Kevin Mbabu. Sylvain Marveaux is back in France on loan.

PA - What has been going on here?????

PB - Dont ask.....

Actually laughed at this bit though, look forward to seeing how the lads progress.

 

[Klippybo]

How on earth did you get Tuchel to agree to being an Assistant Manager?

I dont know - must be the new database. Had to pay big in wages to get him (17k)

 

[roberdooo]

the broccoli and vegetable lines had me rotf.

 

[Klippybo]

PRE-SEASON REVIEW

So I have completed my first pre-season and it was a hectic period. Pre-season results were good but I wasnt overly bothered about them as it was more important to get my players match fit.

As you are aware I overhauled my backroom staff and I feel I have the right support behind me and it was then a case of bringing in the right players to the team and to get rid of the people that I didnt want around the place.

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PLAYERS IN

My biggest signing, and most expensive was the $11.25m capture of Colombian international Eder Alvarez Balanta from River Plate. At 21 years of age he is both already good enough to jump straight into the first team and to also improve significantly.
View attachment 294078

I also brought in Adam Matthews from Celtic for $2.7m to act as cover in the full back positions.
View attachment 294077

Finally I brought in Grant Hanley from Blackburn Rovers on loan for the season as I was desperate for a centre back and didnt want to waste the rest of my budget on a mediocre backup.
View attachment 294076

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PLAYERS OUT

I managed to please both myself and the owner with my outgoing activities. Mike Williamson was sold to Swansea City for $2.6m. How I got that much for a player who cant kick the ball is beyond me and there I was thinking that Swansea liked to bring the ball out from the back and be comfortable on the ball!! I also managed to get $2.5m from Rennes for Gabriel Obertan. The winger may be quick but that is it and he had no future with me.

Sammy Ameobi was sold to Leicester City for $2.4m. I felt that if he was a couple of years younger I would have been willing to work with the boy but it wasnt to be. Jak Alnwick joined Derby for $300,000 and Lubomir Satka joined Trnava for $130,000.

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OTHER CLUB NEWS

I arranged to get Bulgarian side, Ludogrets, as a feeder side to help with work permits.

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PRE-MATCH PRESS CONFERENCE

v Crystal Palace
1st game of the season

R - So here you are, one day day before you manage your first game for Newcastle. Penny for your thoughts?

PA - I am confident of course as I have faith in both myself and my players. I know that whoever I put out on the pitch will give me their all and more importantly give the fans their all.

R - Can you give us any team news?

PA - We will be without Moussa Sissoko and Papiss Cisse for sure which are a big loss. Paul Dummett and Facundo Ferreyra will also be unavailable.

R - You will be up against your predecessor in Alan Pardew - does that give the game an extra edge?

PA - Of course!!! The players want to show him what he gave up, the fans want him to know that they have moved on to better things and he will be thinking the same! I would just like to thank him for the opportunity to manage this fine club!

R - Can you tell us a bit about your new signings?

PA - Sure. Eder Alvarez Balanta is a superstar in the making. Make no mistake. He will compliment Fabricio Coloccini perfectly. Adam Matthews and Grant Hanley may not be the big names that the fans crave but I have confidence in their abilities.

R - Finally, can you tell us why this is the first press conference you have done since your introduction to the club? It is not the done thing!!!

PA - I didnt have the time. You seem to forget that I have a very profitable fruit and vegetable business to run too!!! At the end of the day my future will be decided on the pitch and not in the media suites and I can tell you now that I will only be giving you press conferences at the end of each month. Now may I ask you a question?

R - Errr ok. Go ahead.

PA - Did you enjoy the soup that we laid on for you?

R - Yes it was delicious!!!

PA - Good. It was a vegetable soup made from the vegetables that my company grows. There are some catalogues and order forms at the back of the room.

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