The Only Way Is S6

[nikolz]

Welcome to Sheffield!

Rumours are circulating here at SWFC of Gary Megson's departure. In a bit of a mystery , the manager had been doing well and making some good changes at Wednesday but yesterday luch time local reports confirm a ambulance entering the grounds some time after trainning....
So far the club has declined to comment on the situation. However we do expect the clubs media secretary to announce a statement from the clubs chairman Milan Mandaric shortly.

The Wednesday faithfull await further news on yet more upheaval here at Hillsborough. Chairman Milan Manadaric is well known for not hanging around and dwelling on situations so we could see some interesting news very shory.....


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[nikolz]

Official statement realeased by Sheffield Wednesday FC


It appears the Owls have acted swiftly in appointing a new man at the helm of SWFC. In a shock move they have appointed a retired semi-pro footballer to take the reins at Hillsborogh.


Big names were linked with job , Nigel Pearson , John Sherridan and many more so the unknown Ben Nicholls must have really shone in his interview with the chairman.


Nicholls who never made it into the proffesional game at a high level is said to be "Delighted" and will be hosting a press conferrence with a question and answer session shortly at the ground.


The official site have posted this statement:

Pressure will be on Nicholls from the off. Media predictions have them at second in the league this season with a large crowd to keep pleased and some high profile players.


We will be covering the press conference , dont miss out on our first meeting with the new man to attempt to restore SWFC to its former glory.






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[*Paul*]

Love the title, mate, but I just think the layout isn't very good.

You shouldn't centre everything and leave massive gaps everywhere - also try and keep all post formats similar. But it's good - just a little bit of a shame with the layout. Keep it up!

 

[nikolz]

Ill try left justifying it and see how it goes At the moment Im just catching up from another forum where I started this.

 

[nikolz]

Transcript from Ben Nicholls' first SWFC press conference.


Geoff (Star ): Welcome to Hillsborogh Ben , surely as a life long fan this is your dream job ?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Yeah your right Geoff. This is a massive club with a massive fan base. Im delighted to be here.

Geoff (Star ): Ben , the fans are naturally sceptical of your arrival at S6 , what do you have to say about that ?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Look , George .... Geoff , what ever your name is, lets get this straight from the off. Im not media friendly. I say it how it is and demand respect from my players and staff. Give me six months and then the fans can judge me. Im here to wake up a sleeping giant. With Milan's backing were going to the top!

Geoff (Star ): Erm.. ok sorry if i offended by, weve all got a job to do right ?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): yes and my jobs bigger than yours.

Geoff (Star ): How did you get the job Ben , instead of a better known manager?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Because Bernard or who ever you are i dont take any sh*t. Not from journo's , players or any one. Im like our chair man , straight talking and only interested in results!

Geoff (Star ): Ok Ben , so whats the plan ?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Attack , Attack , Attack. Be fast and clinical. Get the job done!

Geoff (Star ): Do you think you can go up ?
Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Its going to be a long season , theres some dead wood that needs to go. We'll see....

Ben Nicholls (SWFC): Any way i have a job to do take that dicta-phone and ****** off back to your office and type up some lies....

 

[nikolz]

So... first day at work. I pulled up into the car park this morning in my 02 plate Ford Focus. I park bang next to Milan , hopefully he'll get the hint. Cant expect too much though after the measly wages he offered me for the job. No wonder no one else seriously considered the job.


I walk through the building until this annoying little PA introduces himself. Cant remember his name looked like he'd just left school and needed a good meal. He shows me to my office and familiarises me with how my company laptop and office contraptions work.


I open up the tired old laptop , there's what looks like Wotsits stuck between the keys! Not having that ! In the bin it goes , job number one for the PA , fetch me a new laptop. Job number two for the PA , find me a new PA preferably a nice female blonde one.


10.00 Sees the first staff meeting. I am introduced the remaining back room staff that worked under Meggy. Useless. 95% of them are on the dole come Monday. First out of the door Chris Evans , how did that guy get a coaching badge. Doesn't know his head from his ****!


11:00 PA returns with new PA and packs his things. Result , got a blonde one.
Emailed Job centre asking for a ad for:
New assistant manager
Scouts
First team coach


11.30 Receive email from Milan

Hmm might have stuffed that up in the last press conference Milan , hey ho , ill give it a go.
Time to see who we can bring in on the transfers and see if we can find any clubs daft enough to take some of these idiots Megson bought off me. Must also ask Milan where this Benski thing is from , must be the Vodka!