Arnold J. Rimmer - Time Travelling Football Manager

Arnold Rimmer

Apr 17, 2013
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Red Dwarf XI - Football Manager
Rimmer and Lister are rummaging through a seized post-pod
LISTER: Rimmer, any **** mags?
RIMMER: You really are that desperate aren't you?
LISTER: I've been in deep space for years Rimmer, of course I am!
RIMMER: Unluckily for you, there are no **** magazines. Although there is a Football Manager 2013 game here.
LISTER: 2013? WOW! That game was voted best Football Manager game in 2086. But to be fair all the games from 2014-2057 sucked. Is that compatible with the time computer?
RIMMER: It should be, it's powered by Windows.
LISTER: I bet you couldn't manage a team and win the league.
RIMMER: What if I do?
LISTER: I'll call you Lord Admiral Rimmer and Sir for a year.
RIMMER: A year seems like forever out here, tell you what, your on. What if I don't?
LISTER: You have to scrub the toilets for a month.
RIMMER: Your on.
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YEAR - 3000020
Lister has made a bet that if I can win the league on Football Manager he'll call me Lord Admiral or Sir. If I lose, toilet patrol. Luckily I did some research on the 2000s in football when I was on Earth thinking it could come in handy. Back then Manchester United were the top dogs, in the 3000s it was Mansfield Town winning the Premiership. However, I've decided to manage Arsenal because it's red and Manchester is a silly name. The game is taking a while to load so I will update the diary in 24 Earth Hours. In space time around ten minutes.
Epic! I love Red Dwarf and I will be following this!
I will follow. You should sign players/staff called Rimmer, Lister etc lol. I loved Red Dwarf back in the day!
So are you playing in the year 3000???
Not exactly, the story is that Lister and Rimmer found the 2013 Editon in a post pod. Rimmer did research on old football and considering Red Dwarf is set 3 million years into the future, the point is that he is mentioning what he studied from the past.
RED DWARF Diary Update -
Unfortunately, just before the start of preseason. That idiot Kryten didn't cook the chicken properly and somehow I have salmonella. Seeing as Lister is as dumb as a piece of wood, my replacement Ace Rimmer jumped into our dimension and will be taking over for Pre-Season. And don't get excited, it will never happen again.

I told you I'd be back! Ace Rimmer, Space Adventurer and secret Space Footballing star. Old Arnie here isn't feeling to good so I've agreed to temporarily manage Arsenal. I played for their Space team in the 24th Galaxy. We won three Space league titles. The seasons were a bit long so I dimension jumped and ended up here. As it stands there are no worlds to save so I'm free for the next three million years. Arnie hasn't gotten rid of the bad staff so it appears I will have to shape the team. So, here's what I've done.
First of all, I told Kryten to round up the staff we didn't require and make him break the news, here's how he got on during practice with Arnie.
I removed all the physios because from what I recall from reading the Football Bible of the 2000s, Arsenal have injury problems. I also transfer listed the smegheads.
Right now, the computer isn't doing screenshots but so far, here's what I've done.
Stevan Jovetic from Fiorentina - £18.5m
Tim Krul from Newcastle - £10m
Neven Subotic from Borussia Dortmund £9m
Unfortunately, Arnie is feeling better and is already back to his depressing self, I can't stand to be around him.
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast.
In life, there is a long road. The more of the road you cover, the more bumps you get along the way. In this case, my computer had to be wiped and all I recovered was the emergency backup disc I last updated 27 days ago. The Arnold Rimmer Challenge was lost but I am working my hardest to get it back.
If I get the save back - Postponement from 7 to 14 days
If I don't get the save back - Football Manager 2014
Wish me luck,
My laptop is a pile of smeg and for that I apologize to the Dwarfers who were looking forward to the save unfolding.