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Customer Support

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Get in the Van.
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Stole it, but it's funny..and the joke thread wasn't deserving.

Actual dialog of a former Customer Support employee:

Support: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"

Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

Support: "What sort of trouble?"

Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.",

Support: "Went away?"

Customer:"They disappeared."

Support: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

Customer: "Nothing."

Support: "Nothing?"

Customer: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

Support: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

Customer: "How do I tell?"

Support: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"

Customer: "What's a sea-prompt?"

Support: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

Customer: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

Support: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

Customer: "What's a monitor?"

Support: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

Customer: "I don't know."

Support: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

Customer: ......"Yes, I think so."

Support: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

Customer: ......"Yes, it is."

Support: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

Customer: "No."

Support: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

Customer: ......"Okay, here it is."

Support: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

Customer: "I can't reach."

Support: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

Customer: "No."

Support: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

Customer:"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."

Support: "Dark?

Customer: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

Support: "Well, turn on the office light then."

Customer:"I can't."

Support: "No? Why not?"

Customer: "Because there's a power outage."

Support: "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

Support: "Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

Customer: "Really? Is it that bad?"

Support: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."

Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

Support: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
:D
 
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Quite funny, but most likely untrue.

Being an Administration student, I know that offering Customer Support like that would lead to the company gaining a bad reputation and so on. So that Customer Support person would have been fired/given a warning!
 
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I remember when FM-Base members weren't arseholes...and i didnt steal it off you daire :p.
 
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Douy said:
Quite funny, but most likely untrue.

Being an Administration student, I know that offering Customer Support like that would lead to the company gaining a bad reputation and so on. So that Customer Support person would have been fired/given a warning!
pity you couldnt even finish the test
 
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Redders said:
I remember when FM-Base members weren't arseholes...and i didnt steal it off you daire :p.
i realise that now,because you got it off your *** buddy,but i posted that up here before
 
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Redders said:
I remember when FM-Base members weren't arseholes...
It's all went downhill since you came along Redders :)
 
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nah that would be Lloyds doing.

And your not chairperson of Gregors fan club i am...:wub: :)
 
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I believe I am a bigger Gregor Cameron Smith fan than you Redders....
 
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