So, here it is.
Well, not really, I mean, it's June 5. 2020. Uhm, in medias res, I think it's called, in the middle of it all. Somehow, and gods are still still looking for the **** who accepted this as a possible timeline, we, Guiseley and I, have slowly realised that we are soon going to start the season off in the League Two. Gone are the days of Vanarama, no more compass ****, no more "hitting the 'local' on the way," this is it. Professional f***ing football. I guess...
I didn't intend for this. This was far off the goal back in the summer a year ago. Sure, we were on an upward form, but so were Leeds once. Sure, some guys put in very impressing performances in the season before, but even Ravel Morrison did that some time. But ****** ****, every person who's ever taken a glance upon our squad, would barely ,just about, suit us right for the Vanarama National. So why the **** are we now staring League Two in it's scary ********? Maybe, just maybe, every other team had a genuine off season, for whatever reason. And maybe, all of our players managed to pull of the best performances of their lives. Or maybe, just god-****-******-***-maybe, we're actually good enough for League Two?
No.
Holy ****, no, we are not. I don't know how it happened, but a journalist once proposed that my tactical shrewdness was the mother of all this, and I've just run with it since. But we've come a long way since my debut days in Stirling, in the Scottish League 2. I didn't even last half a year. I was done, gone into the dust, like Wayne Rooneys talent after the age of 30. Along came Guiseley, and I figured, "Heck, at least it'll give me some time to work on me badges!" But f***ing ****. Some strokes, stress pills, pub fights, AA-meetings, and years later, we are now in League 2.
I am not cut out for professional football. I'm not cut out for being professional at anything. And nor is any one of my players. The board want us to be a full-time pro club, jokes. Wants to offer all of the players and staff full-time contracts, hillarious. Wants to build the club into a Football League side, slapping my thighs. My caffeine addiction, willingness to spend money on Guinness wherever I go, and ability to stare into the empty fridge for hours, are not key stats for a football manager. My dad once told me, never quit before you're thrown out. But then again, he was an alcoholic in a bar, so much he said never really applied. But this is it, I am too stubborn to quit, too impatient to look around for a new job, and too reliable of the Barley Mow Inn to move elsewhere.
Five years ago I was scraping days together in Denmark, worrying for how to survive the next day. Now those days are a dream-to-be in the past. Maybe I should just quit and apply for that gig as the local drunk? *Sigh*, when I look upon the training field, looking at my "finest" scraping and sliding and tossing themselves around, in search for some kind of round leather to kick at, the answer feels sure fire and easy. But knowing me right, I'll still be here tomorrow.
Geez, what the f*** am I doing...
Well, not really, I mean, it's June 5. 2020. Uhm, in medias res, I think it's called, in the middle of it all. Somehow, and gods are still still looking for the **** who accepted this as a possible timeline, we, Guiseley and I, have slowly realised that we are soon going to start the season off in the League Two. Gone are the days of Vanarama, no more compass ****, no more "hitting the 'local' on the way," this is it. Professional f***ing football. I guess...
I didn't intend for this. This was far off the goal back in the summer a year ago. Sure, we were on an upward form, but so were Leeds once. Sure, some guys put in very impressing performances in the season before, but even Ravel Morrison did that some time. But ****** ****, every person who's ever taken a glance upon our squad, would barely ,just about, suit us right for the Vanarama National. So why the **** are we now staring League Two in it's scary ********? Maybe, just maybe, every other team had a genuine off season, for whatever reason. And maybe, all of our players managed to pull of the best performances of their lives. Or maybe, just god-****-******-***-maybe, we're actually good enough for League Two?
No.
Holy ****, no, we are not. I don't know how it happened, but a journalist once proposed that my tactical shrewdness was the mother of all this, and I've just run with it since. But we've come a long way since my debut days in Stirling, in the Scottish League 2. I didn't even last half a year. I was done, gone into the dust, like Wayne Rooneys talent after the age of 30. Along came Guiseley, and I figured, "Heck, at least it'll give me some time to work on me badges!" But f***ing ****. Some strokes, stress pills, pub fights, AA-meetings, and years later, we are now in League 2.
I am not cut out for professional football. I'm not cut out for being professional at anything. And nor is any one of my players. The board want us to be a full-time pro club, jokes. Wants to offer all of the players and staff full-time contracts, hillarious. Wants to build the club into a Football League side, slapping my thighs. My caffeine addiction, willingness to spend money on Guinness wherever I go, and ability to stare into the empty fridge for hours, are not key stats for a football manager. My dad once told me, never quit before you're thrown out. But then again, he was an alcoholic in a bar, so much he said never really applied. But this is it, I am too stubborn to quit, too impatient to look around for a new job, and too reliable of the Barley Mow Inn to move elsewhere.
Five years ago I was scraping days together in Denmark, worrying for how to survive the next day. Now those days are a dream-to-be in the past. Maybe I should just quit and apply for that gig as the local drunk? *Sigh*, when I look upon the training field, looking at my "finest" scraping and sliding and tossing themselves around, in search for some kind of round leather to kick at, the answer feels sure fire and easy. But knowing me right, I'll still be here tomorrow.
Geez, what the f*** am I doing...
Last edited: