The Alfa Romeo Metaphor

League Two: AFC Wimbledon v. Coventry City FC

View attachment 400969Another full house at The Fan's Stadium - Kingsmeadow.

We really should beat Coventry. The problem is we don't have the killer instinct I want in front of goal. Loveridge has cooled down and Michael Smith is just back from injury and isn't even fully fit yet. Daniel Barlaser and George Francomb are the only other two who have contributed offensively. And George is sitting this one out because he's too tired from Saturday.

Matteo Nole just cannot finish and Leandro Depetris is still settling. Adam Pepper has not lived up to expectations but has been playing better lately.

Also, I'm not risking Mark Tomlinson's hamstrings after playing all 90 minutes on Saturday. I'll start with Pepper paired with Barlaser in the middle of a 451.

GK: Daniel Lincoln
D: Brad Smith, Kris Thackray, Andy Frampton, James Fenlon
M: Steven Gregory (DM), Simon Johnson, Daniel Barlaser, Adam Pepper, Matteo Nole
F: James Loveridge

Subs: Chris Dunn (GK), Reuben Hazell (D), Cameron Dummigan (D), Mark Tomlinson (M), Fabian Rowe (M), Leandro Depetris (M), Michael Smith (F)

"Listen to them," I said. "Who knew five thousand people could make this much noise. We've been great at home this season and they know it. They love it. Coventry are going to play a striker with three attacking midfielders. Since we're playing five in midfield, they'll be easy to shut down."

"I think we can send them home happy," I continued. "Steven, you mark their central attacking mid Billy Daniels. Let Thacks and Andy deal with Ben Hoskins. Brad and Fens, play narrow and deny their three attacking mids any space behind you. Daniels and Hoskins get an extra helping of special sauce, clear?"

"If we play our game, we'll win," I said. "Michael and Leandro will come on late once their defense is tiring. I have faith that we will dictate the tempo and keep possession. We do these simple things and we'll get the result we want. Let's go, boys!"

George won a corner inside a minute. The Sky Blues cleared it but right at Loveridge. Lovers smashed a volley right back into the mosh pit and hit somebody hard.

In the 6th minute, we shut down a Sky Blue attack. We passed it around in our half a bit then Pepper played a pass up to Lovers. He didn't have much space so he played it out wide to Simon. Simon raced past the Coventry left back and curled in a beauty.

Lovers leapt and smashed a header past their keeper.

1-0

A header!?! By Lovers!?! AWESOME!

In the 13th minute, we won a corner. George's cross in was cleared and Lovers controlled it outside of the box. He dished it off to Danny Boy. Coventry keeper Carlo Nash made a great save to tip it round the post.

In the 21st minute, Matteo beat 3 defenders in a mazy run in from the left but Nash denied him.

Pepper shot wide in the 26th and 36th when he had other, better options.

Captain Andy won the ensuing goal kick from Peps' second wild shot and we worked the ball around the midfield for a while. Then Lovers showed for the ball, got it, dribbled forward but instead of trying to take his defenders on, he shot well wide from 30 yards.

This is what I'm talking about. Despite already scoring, he tries to impersonate Frank Lampard. Lovers has got a decent enough shot from inside the box and he scares League Two defenders when he runs at them. Running at the defense is his strength so why the **** is he blazing away from 30 yards.

Baffling.

In the 42nd minute, Brad dribbles into the box and shoots. His shot is blocked but it falls to Lovers. His shot is blocked but it falls to Brad. Brad clears the ball to safety. Actually, he hit it so hard and so high it left the stadium. That's not actually that hard to do, BTW.

Thacks won the header to Steven Gregory. Gregs lobbed a long ball to nobody into the corner. Coventy keeper Nash raced out and tried to play a pass up to their left midfielder. Simon intercepted it and played it quickly into Lovers hoping to catch Nash out. Unfortunately, Lovers needed to take a bunch of touches and ended up shooting wide.

Just before the 45 minute mark, Matteo beat his defender and whipped in a cross. It was cleared but only to Danny Boy about 20 yards out. Guess what happened? They blocked his shot! Are you seeing a pattern here?

Brad was first to the clearance and played a pass infield to Gregs. Gregs spotted Lovers wide open at the edge of the box and got him the ball. Sadly and predictably, the shot was blocked.

Danny Boy was first to the ball and hammered a shot destined for just inside the post. Except Nash intervened with a flying save that he held.

And soon after the half was over.

"Great work rate, great passing out there," I said. "They're blocking a ****load of our shots. Keep hammering away. Sooner or later we'll bag the insurance goal. Keep your work rate high and keep playing the simple ball. No changes."

Not long after the restart, Coventry worked the ball into our half with some nice passing. Their forward Hoskins and their attacking midfielder Fleck continued their attack culminating in Hoskins playing a pass behind Brad. Brad was caught ball-watching and Fleck was in on Lincoln.

Lincoln smothered the shot Fleck tried to sneak under him.

Coventry managed to keep it in our half for a while. It didn't help that we started to play long balls out of the back instead of working the ball out.

"C'MON! PLAY SHORT PASSES!" I yelled after the third time we hoofed the ball out when we had passing options. "SHORT PASSES! SHORT PASSES!"

In the 57th minute, we did manage to get the ball into their half. Unfortunately, Coventry were working harder than us and shut down our attack. They countered and this time Fleck became provider for Hoskins. Lincoln made a fantastic sprawling save to tip the ball round the post and preserve our lead.

Their corner amounted to a goal kick for us. Lincoln played a short pass up to Thacks. Thacks played it out to Brad. Brad had time but instead of turning and playing a ball up to Simon, he played it back to Lincoln. Lincoln thumped it over the half line and yelled at Brad for playing it back.

Coventry won the clearance and proceeded to pitch camp in our half. They couldn't get past our parked bus, but it was now clear that my players were going to sit back and defend.

I told Smith, Leandro and Fabian to start warming up.

In the 64th minute, I replaced Danny Boy with Leandro.

I then decided that we needed more muscle up front, i.e., someone who would chase after clearances and hold up the ball. Smith presented his card to the second official as Leandro waited for Danny Boy to trudge off.

The ref wouldn't let me get my second change in immediately. The fourth official was trying to get his attention.

"HEY STROUD! REF! REF! HEY STROUD!" I hollered. "C'MON, STROUD! SUBSTITUTE!"

We entered the 66th minute.

I hollered some more.

"Do I need to insult him to get his attention?" I asked the fourth official in the 68th minute.

By this time the crowd was whistling and booing to try and get the ref's attention.

In the 70th minute, I got into the fourth official's face.

"Listen you imbecile," I said. "Get that incompetent toilet shroud's attention. You've got a ****ing headset. ****ing use it."

"Shut it, Enrico," said the fourth official. "What do you think I've been trying to do. I think the ****ing thing is busted."

So I got the entire bench up and we started jumping up and down and waving to get the referee's attention.

I finally got replaced Lovers with Smith in the 73rd minute but not before Lovers picked up a knock.

By this time, we completely fallen apart. All we could do was hoof the ball out of play.

I put my hands in my pockets and gritted my teeth. You may know the saying "nobody is dumber than all of us." Well, as a group, we were unable to complete simple passes. The remainder of the match was going to be spent in our half and I hope our luck held.

It didn't.

In the 77th minute, Hoskins went down like he'd been shot by a sniper. Captain Andy was running next to him and immediately began remonstrating with the ref that he hadn't touched him. Of course, you know where Hoskins was lying. Several of my player were either concerned that he'd been shot or were yelling obscenities at him.

Kevin Stroud, being the idiot that he'd proven to be so far in this game, pointed to the spot.

Hoskins leapt to his feet and received congratulations from his teammates. Thank God a sniper hadn't infiltrated our security here at Kingsmeadow and he'd only been faking it until the ref awarded the penalty.

1-1

Fleck sent Lincoln the wrong way.

View attachment 400954Our spirit was deflated and all we could manage to do was park the bus and absorb the Sky Blue's attacks. Daniel Lincoln was the sole reason we kept at least a point today. Utter collapse as far as I'm concerned.

When the final whistle blew, I walked over and shook Dean Smith's hand. I turned to walk out onto the field and talk to the ref but I felt the long arm of Paul Rachubka go over my shoulder. I also noticed that Hanks was at my other shoulder.

They spun me around and escorted me off the pitch before I could do or say something stupid.

"Can I at least check the scores?" I pleaded with my captors as the frog-marched me into the changing room.

They let me take my phone out of my pocket once I promised not to use it as a weapon.

It was a drawtastic weekend. Leaders Southend drew. 2nd place Rochdale drew with 3rd place Wycombe. Hartlepool drew and moved into 5th because 5th place Cheltenham lost and dropped to 6th.

Sometimes, timing is everything.

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My phone jangled as I was driving back to my flat after the match. It was Paco.

"Paco, how are you?" I answered in Spanish.

"We're great, but you were robbed of all three points!" Paco shouted. I could hear other voices in the background. "Hold on, I'm going to put you on speaker."

"Okay. Why? Where are you."

"The Cadiz Wimbledon Fan Club had our third official meeting and watched your match against Coventry," Paco said.

"Hey, Enrico," the unmistakable voice of Esteban chimed in. "The ref was a **** ******* ** ****** ******!"

"Did you see my coaches restrain me afterwards?" I asked. "Wait. How did you watch the match?"

"Streaming over the internet, you knucklehead," added Javi Garcia. "And, yes, we saw you being led off the pitch like a confused, senile pensioner."

"Wait, you gentleman, wouldn't have been drinking would you?" I asked.

"A toast to Enrico!" exclaimed Paco. "May he scream at refs for many, many years to come!"

I heard much yelling and clinking then silence as they drank.

View attachment 400925"I must apologize as I've nothing to drink in my car," I said. "I'm driving the kilometer or so home from the stadium."

"Kingsmeadow is really small," Esteban said.

"We're working on that," I replied. "You all know the story, right?" I heard a chorus of replies. "Wait. How many people are there?"

It turns out about 20. Mikel Martins, Airam and Perico were there in addition to the coaches. A number of friends of Esteban's that I'd met over the year I lived there.

"I should offer you all my congratulations," I said. "The Yellow Submarine is in 1st place with games in hand. Sounds like Aurelio is really doing the job."

There was a cacophony of agreement.

"The defense is hard," Paco replied. "Dalmau, Belforti, Josete, all of them are gone. Alejandro, the goalkeeper, too. The new defenders are simply better players. It is night and day. We were never going to do anything with the back four we had last year. It was our curse."

"Your numbers show it," I replied. "7 goals conceded is fantastic."

We chatted for a while after I got home. It's always good to reconnect with old friends.
 
Wednesday, 26 November 2014 1:30PM or so

"A word, Enrico," said Erik Samuelson, Chairman of AFC Wimbledon, between drills during training. He often watched training.

"Sure."

"I want to discuss extending your contract," he said quietly so nobody else would hear.

I nodded my approval.

"After?"

"Of course," he replied. "I'll be there with the rest of the DTB. Do you think you can be by at half three? I'll text them."

"Works for me," I said.
 
I had Hanks drop me off at Kingsmeadow. Erik's car was already there as was Ivor Heller's. I have no idea what the other member's Dickie Guy and Nigel Higgs drove.

For those of you who have forgotten or aren't aware, AFC Wimbledon are owned by the supporters. I am to be meeting with the Don's Trust Board. The four men mentioned above are the Directors appointed by the Supporter's Trust Board and oversee the operations of the club. This means that the DTB have gotten permission from the STB to offer me a contract extension and the STB must approve whatever contract the DTB and I agree to before it becomes official.

The door to the conference room was open so I walked in. I shook hands with all four members of the DTB.

"I'd like to start off by saying how pleased we are with what you've done so far in the six months you've been here," Erik began. "Before we start talking terms, we'd like to review our expectations."

View attachment 400631"We expected a mid-table position, we've given you a transfer 70,000 pound budget of which you have 31,000 pounds remaining. We've given you a wage budget of 25,000 per week. We expect you to sign young players for the first team and to play attacking football."

"Do you wish to alter these expectations?" Erik asked.

"Nope."

"Then let's talk terms," Erik continued. "We offer you 775 pounds per week plus the flat and the car maintenance. A 10% increase for promotion and 35% reduction upon relegation. This contract would be through the end of June 2016."

"Okay, I appreciate the offer and thank you for having confidence in me," I replied. "But I have a team that with the addition of a few players can compete in League One once I get them there. Most managers in League One make in the vicinity of two to three thousand per week."

"So with that in mind," I said. "Here's my counter offer. 1,000 per week and a 25% increase upon promotion plus the flat and car maintenance."

"That's too high for our structure," Erik responded. "We could do 825 per week. I know you realize that we're working toward paying competitive League One and Championship wages, but we can't do that until we get a stadium and larger gate receipts."

"Would that include the 25% increase upon promotion?" I asked.

"No."

"What I want you to consider is that I can build a team to get us into the Championship," I replied. "As these kids mature, we can be a Championship side."

While I made the pitch for what I could do for the club, I was also calculating that 825 would become over 1K weekly wage once I got the team.

"Okay, how about this," I continued. "850 per week, flat, car maintenance, 25% promotion increase, 35% relegation decrease. Is that acceptable?"

Erik looked at the other Directors. They all nodded their agreement.

"Excellent," he concluded. "I do believe were in agreement. I'll draw up the terms and present them to the STB. They meet tomorrow and provided they approve this, and I can't imagine they won't, we can announce this extension on Friday."

We all stood and shook hands.

View attachment 400633
 
"What can I get you?" Gwen asked.

"I'll have one of you," I said.

"I'm sorry, sir," Gwen said and turned to examine the menu on the wall behind her. "I'm not on the menu today. Would you like to order something off the menu before you, sir?"

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" I asked.

She groaned.

"I'm off in fifteen, you want an espresso or something while you wait?" she asked.

"Yes, an espresso, please, miss," I replied.

I sipped my espresso and read the latest football and world news on my phone.

"What brings you down here?" Gwen asked sitting down across from me.

"I have good news. Wimbledon and I have agreed to a contract extension and a raise."

"Brilliant," she exclaimed. "What do you want to do to celebrate?"

"That's where I thought you might help."

She suggested high tea, a movie and then dinner. Works for me.
 
Friendly: AFC Wimbledon v. Hastings United

View attachment 400165Our fixture against Oldham Athletic had been moved to mid-week because Oldham were still in the FA Cup.

We needed to break out of our scoring slump, so I scheduled this friendly against the semi-pros Hastings United. Now that Michael Smith and Mark Tomlinson are back, I want to start playing the 442 again.

Everyone would get 45 minutes.

GK: Daniel Lincoln
D: Brad Smith, Kris Thackray, Andy Frampton, James Fenlon
M: George Francomb, Mark Tomlinson, Daniel Barlaser, Simon Johnson
F: James Loveridge, Michael Smith

Loveridge set up Smith for a number of chances. He converted one. I'm still concerned about Lovers, though. He isn't running at the defense like he used to. Also, his shooting is limp and inaccurate.

Back-up defender Pat Baldwin scored from an inaccurate cross that floated over the keeper and nestled into the upper far corner of the net. Everyone but Pat claimed he meant to do that. Pat remained silent on the subject.

The teams who hadn't had their League Two matches postponed. We slipped to 5th after Hartlepool beat Bristol Rovers and moved up from 5th to 2nd. But more important for the bigger picture and Wimbledon's prospects for the season, Southend lost at home. That had to hurt.

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Sunday, 30 November 2014, noonish

"Alright, Lil," I said. "Tell me about Oldham."

"They stank under your predecessor Neal Ardley and they have improved marginally since they sacked Neal and replaced him with Richie Barker," Lil explained. "They still play a 451 with wingers and if we mark their wingers tightly we shouldn't have too much problem."

"If we use 442 I foresee them having real problems with James and Michael," my Chief Scout continued. "And they drop deep when defending so late runs from Daniel or Leandro should be devastating."

"Thanks," I said. "What else?"

"Fabian Rowe has whatever flu you had," Physiotherapist Jon Whitney said. "As you know, he'll be at home until further notice. Probably back in training next weekend. We'll see. He's young. Matteo's groin injury is going to take time. Looks like two more weeks at this point."

"Danny Boy and Mark Tomlinson are improving by leaps and bounds," my Assistant Manager Sean Hankin said. "From strength and endurance to tactics to ball skills, everything. Being in the starting eleven is the key for their improvement. The concensus is still that Daniel's potential is as a League One midfielder and that Mark could play in the Championship."

"On the other hand, Haz and Pat Baldwin's ball skills concern me," he continued. "They seem to be getting worse."

"And Lincoln is also improving rapidly," Paul Rachubka, goalkeeping coach interjected. "His skill set is improving nicely, but he's got top class agility. The lad's like a cat."

"I have news about the possibility of Vinnie Jones showing up for a match," I said. "It's been confirmed. It'll be sooner than we originally had thought during the holidays. Instead it'll be for the Accrington Stanley home match on the 13th. This is also good because Accrington stink and we'll probably take all three points. Would hate to ruin his visit by losing."

"Anything else?" I asked. "Alright then. Focus this week is on attacking. Oldham and Bristol are weak sides and we need to make sure our offense is in top shape. As per usual, we'll work on free kicks prior to each match."
 
View attachment 400160Enrico Pucci @enricopucci - 30 Nov 14
RT @AFCWimbledon It's official! @VinnieJones will attending the 13 Dec home
match v. Accrington. Get your tix now! bit.ly/Hm3p2L #Wimbledon
 
League Two: Oldham Athletic AFC v. AFC Wimbledon

View attachment 400158An afternoon train ride up north to Manchester and then a bus ride to Boundary Park in Oldham. People often moan about the weather in England. I understand. It's damp. Often. But occasionally you get days in December like today. 9 Celsius (48 F) and calm is mighty nice for an evening match. I'll be enjoying it from underneath my hat, scarf and parka.

The Latics are having a tough season. They've been a point or two above the relegation zone since September. Their new manager Richie Barker motivated them to bag a couple of victories, but two straight losses combined with victories for fellow strugglers have dropped them back into the danger zone.

We hope to compound their misery.

GK: Chris Dunn
D: Brad Smith, Kris Thackray, Andy Frampton (C), James Fenlon
M: George Francomb, Mark Tomlinson, Daniel Barlaser, Simon Johnson
F: James Loveridge, Michael Smith

Subs: Daniel Lincoln (GK), Reuben Hazell (D), Cameron Dummigan (D), Steven Gregory (M), Adam Pepper (M), Leandro Depetris (M), Jack Redshaw (F)

Oldham have quick wingers so Cam is on the bench. Also, Dave Wilson, the fitness coach, has mentioned that Cam came back really knackered from his last international trip. Probably partied too hard, but Dave's assessment was he needed a rest.

"As you noticed, this stadium is not even a quarter full," I said to begin my team talk. "And a whole lot of the people in the seats are Wombles up from London. Oldham are hurting and I expect you all to step on their necks and make their misery worse. Their confidence is low. Many of the players were part of last season's relegation. Now they're staring at another relegation and this time it's out of the professional league. It's got to suck to be in that locker room, to turn up to training every day. Let's make it worse for them."

"If we are title challengers, if we are promotion hopefuls, we win today," I said. "I have faith that our defense can shut down the worst offense in League Two. I have faith that we can score against one of the worst defenses in League Two. Go forth an emasculate them."

Oldham started well. Having been relegated, I could tell they wanted to get off to a strong start. We held them at bay without giving them any early chances. Our early counter attacks were toothless.

In the 20th minute, they created the first chance of the match. Left winger Salim Kerkar fed a pass across the top edge of the box. Their striker Adam Rooney had a wide open shot and despite having plenty of time to set himself, fired directly at Chris Dunn.

I can see why they're in trouble.

We started to wake up. We started winning tackles, winning 50-50 balls and getting to loose balls first.

In the 29th minute, Danny played a pass up to Loveridge. Lovers controlled the ball and raced into the left channel. Once inside the box, he cut back onto his right foot and rolled a weak shot well wide of the far post. Everything looked great up until his shot.

'I gotta do something about this,' I thought to myself. 'He's just not playing like himself for a while now.'

Danny unleashed a cannon of a shot, but right at the Latic's keeper in the 31st minute. But this was more like it. We were starting to control the play.

As the clock rolled past 36 minutes, Oldham finally broke out of their end on the counter. Tomlinson ended their chance with a cynical tackle. I was shocked he wasn't carded. But it would have been worth the card regardless as Rooney was about to dribble into the box.

Midfielder Michael O'Connor curled the free kick around the wall and a whisker wide of Chris Dunn's left post. Dunn just stood there and watched it whistle past. We got lucky. But this is what happens against team's facing relegation; they have no luck.

In the 44th, Simon ran into a dead end dribbling down into the left corner. He played a ball back for Fenlon. Fens stepped into it and whipped in a ball to the back post. George outmuscled and out-jumped their left back and smashed a header goalward. Unfortunately, right at the keeper who tipped it over the bar.

I hadn't mentioned Michael Smith up until this point. It's because he'd been waging a personal war against the Oldham backline and midfield. He'd challenged for many headers, held up the ball when he got it and generally taken a beating and given one as well. I could tell he was tiring, but needed the mayhem that he creates at least until halftime. Unfortunately, it was just about halftime and we were still tied.

Anyway, George whipped in a free kick and Smith leapt above two defenders at the far post and headed the ball across the goal mouth. Captain Andy leapt and smashed it off the keeper's hand and into the net for his first goal of the season!

0-1

We'd scored a second goal from a corner after scoring none all season.

We then proceeded to do exactly what drives me absolutely bat**** crazy. We proceeded to fall asleep defensively. We gave them two chances in quick succession that they didn't convert because they are completely and utterly lacking in any attacking confidence. A decent side would have punished us.

Dunn was brilliant to deny them. Our lead is down to him.

"I'm in a quandary, Hanks," I said quietly to Sean Hankin as we walked toward the changing room. "Do I praise them for keeping the ball in their half and attacking? Or do I rip them for the four chances they gave away and especially the two right after we'd scored? Or do I warn them not to get complacent?"

"You're still planning to switch to a 451 and take Smith off?" Hanks asked. I nodded. "Hmmm ... let's just praise them and hope the Oldham collapse in the second half. If we hold them until the hour mark, I think they'll fall apart."

I went with Hanks' advice. Tomlinson dropped into the spot right in front of the defense. Leandro replaced Smith but slotted in beside Danny Boy in the midfield.

When Oldham came out, they'd switched to a 442. Dang. This meant that I'd need Tomlinson to patrol in front of my backline and leave the marking to my backline.

Oldham also came out of the locker room determined. They took the ball into our half from the kick-off and stayed there for a few minutes.

In the 48th, we broke out on the counter attack up the left flank. Simon beat their right back and charged into the box. Their center back swooped in with a powerful tackle that got just about as much of Simon as ball.

"ALL MAN, NO BALL! PENALTY! PENALTY!" I shouted at the ref. All the Wombles behind the goal also had a great view and screamed for a penalty. The ref made the symbol of the ball with his hands to indicate that it was a clean and fair tackle.

I walked up to the fourth official.

"That was ridiculous," I said. "Simply ridiculous."

Oldham took the ball back down managed a long range shot as I continued to moan at the fourth official. Dunn made an easy save and punted the ball upfield. George Francomb ran forward to get underneath it. I cringed as I expected a bone-shattering collision with the left back who was also watching the ball. Maybe their left back noticed George in that split second before the collision because George won the header cleanly and sent it over Lovers head and towards the goal.

The keeper got to the ball first but nearly collided with his retreating center back. Loveridge ran onto the loose ball, took a touch, aimed and filled his pants. He rolled the ball an inch wide of the far post from 20 yards. He could have run the ball all the way into the net.

My palm met my face.

The ball stayed in our half until the 61st minute. Dunn thumped a goal kick over the half line. Lovers won the header to Leandro. Leandro, Tomlinson and Danny Boy passed between themselves until we had it at the top of the Latic's box. Then Leandro played a pass behind their right back for Simon to run onto.

His shot was blocked by a desperation tackle. The ball rebounded to Leandro just outside of the box. He unleashed a thunderous strike that nailed Lovers square in the backside. Lovers barely had time to wince before he got clobbered.

The ref whistled Lovers for being offside.

In the 64th minute, George won another corner down the right. Leandro jogged over to take it. He curled in a near post ball that Brad Smith smashed home.

View attachment 4001020-2

First goal for the club! And Oldham were done and dusted now.

I replaced Simon in the 68th minute. He'd gotten his foot stomped on. Adam Pepper got a few playing minutes. I replaced Loveridge with Redshaw in the last few minutes to waste some time.

As we thanked the traveling supporters they serenaded us with the idiotic little ditty:

"Brad and Andy, fine and dandy! Wombles in second is better than candy!"

I only say it's idiotic because their little ditty stuck in my head all night long. Just wouldn't go away.

But they were right, we were in second. It's so tight up at the top that a win goes a long way when your fellow challengers have the night off or draw or lose.

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I awoke on the bright shining morning of December 4th to math calculations running through my head. We'd hit the 20th match in the League 2 season. 3rd, 4th and 5th positions were all tied at 37 points.

View attachment 399316How many points would these three teams accumulate at the rate they are currently bagging points? If my math was correct, they'd have 85 points at the end of the season.

This meant Wimbledon would need to accumulate 49 more points to finish in an automatic promotion spot. That's 16 wins and a draw in the remaining 26 matches.

This doesn't seem unreasonable.

At home, we are 6W, 3D and 1L. 21 points in 10 matches. That's 2.1 points per match. We have 13 remaining home matches. By my calculations, we'd pull in 27 points in our home matches. In other words, we must win 9 of our 13 home matches. I don't see that as a problem.

That leaves us 21 more points we need to accumulate. Essentially, we need 7 wins in 13 away matches.

Or in other words, we need 16 wins in 26 matches to get us to 48 points. That doesn't seem at all unreasonable.

Ah, math.
 
Thursday 4 December, 2014 noonish

"Is it just me or am I worried for a no reason about our ability to score if we get behind or defend a lead?" I asked.

"What has your doctor said about your meds?" Assistant Manager Sean Hankin asked.

"I hear shock therapy works really well for new managers," Coach Matt Woolley said then started poking away at his iPad.

"It ain't the keepers," Goalkeeping Coach Paul Rachubka added. "Dunn and Lincoln have been keeping us in the matches."

It was clear that Wools was looking up some stats. So we waited.

"Well, we're third best defensively," Wools said finally. "But do consider that we shipped eleven of those 26 goals in two matches."

"We've scored one goal in seven of our last ten," Wools continued. "Of those seven in which we've scored one goal, we've triumphed once, drawn three and lost three. We have not come from behind to draw a match yet this season. Draws have always felt like lost points not a point gained."

"We haven't scored three in a match since October," Wools concluded.

"Thanks, man," I said. "That's not uplifting news but it's interesting."

"I say that sooner or later we're going to bust out," Hanks said. "Our defending is solid. We have the base there. We just need to start scoring."

"Smith has been out, but Loveridge has been stuck since Smith went out," I added. "So I agree with you. I think that once we get them back on form, the goals will start flowing."

"What about Bristol Rovers, Lil?" I asked.

"They'll probably line up with a 451 with wingers," he replied. "They've been hovering in or just above the relegation zone all season. They're one of the few teams near the bottom that haven't fired their manager. They score a decent amount of goals, 29 so far, but have conceded the second most of all teams in the division."

"So I'd play cautiously and count on them crumbling," Lil concluded.
 
WOMBLEblog.co.uk
I don't believe Rover will just roll over

Thrash
5 December 2014 17:28

View attachment 399043I like the city of Bristol well enough. It's pleasant. Been there several times with the wife before the kids. I'm a huge fan of Massive Attack, Portishead and the whole Bristol music scene.

But not their football clubs. City have no redeeming qualities of which I'm aware. We may be visiting them next season as they look certain to be relegated from the Championship and we Wombles are looking good for promotion. But I'm not really interested in them in the least as we don't face them tomorrow.

Maybe it's something in the water but Rovers are in danger of getting relegated as well. Tomorrow, we'll bring our smooth passing game to the poorly maintained pitch surrounded by sheds on three sides and a massive stand on one that the locals call the Memorial Ground.

As away fans, they'll cram us into one the uncovered cattle pen behind one of the goals. Thankfully, the weather is supposed to be rather nice. That would be a change from last season.

And don't get me started on the food. Ghastly. Not fit even for cattle. Which is why they feed it to visiting supporters.

The proposition of playing Rovers in Bristol worries me. We haven't been scoring and Rovers look like a banana peel to me. I think we've rather lost our way of late. I think we've been lucky to stay in the promotion places. It seems everyone is having troubles of late.

I can see Pucci putting out an attacking side and us getting thrashed like at Scumthroat and Roachdale. Yes, I know that those two clubs are much farther up the table, but I'm saying that Pucci has the tendency to naively line up a very attacking side that simply gets shredded.

I'd love to see Smith and Loveridge reunited up top. Love to see them start banging in the goals like back in September and October as we climbed into first. I just can't see it happening tomorrow.
 
League Two: Bristol Rovers FC v. AFC Wimbledon

It's the 6th of December and it's 15C (60F). We had worse weather this time last year in the south of Spain. So I'm loving the weather. We had a nice two hour bus ride to Bristol's Memorial Stadium.

I'm worried about Bristol's ability to score, so I went with a 451. Francomb and Loveridge are tired so Simon Johnson and Michael Smith start. Matteo Nole is still out injured so Adam Pepper starts out on the left wing. Fenlon needs a rest so Dummigan starts at right back and Brad at left. Also, Kris Thackray is suspended so I'm playing teenager Ben Harrison. I've completely lost faith in Reuben Hazell in the center of defense.

Also, Daniel Barlaser will not play a full 90. I think he can manage about an hour.

GK: Chris Dunn
D: Cameron Dummigan, Kris Thackray, Andy Frampton (C), Brad Smith
M: Mark Tomlinson (DM), Simon Johnson, Daniel Barlaser, Leandro Depetris, Adam Pepper
F: Michael Smith

Subs: Daniel Lincoln (GK), Reuben Hazell (D), Jim Fenlon (D), Steven Gregory (M), George Francomb (M), James Loveridge (F), Jack Redshaw (F)

Normally, I give you the exciting highlights. Today was not exciting. Our goal was flukey. 5'7" Mark Tomlinson won a header from a goal kick. He sent it goalward. Michael Smith was first to the ball, fended off two defenders, rounded the goalkeeper and scored.

Tomlinson's screw up led to their goal 3 minutes later. We were camped in their half. The ball had been cleared out and Mark got there first. Instead of passing to any of the several options he had, he held until they stripped it off him. Two passes later and their winger Ellis Harrison was in alone on Dunn.

Suddenly, we couldn't pass. We could barely defend. Rovers could have scored 3 or 4 before half time. Thankfully, their battling relegation for a reason and couldn't convert the chances we gifted them.

Our only other chance in the first half was when Michael Smith dribbled 60 yards but the keeper made himself large and blocked the shot.

"You're playing like strangers," I said at halftime. "Settle down. This is a simple game. Pass to the guys in the same color shirt as you. Seriously."

View attachment 398816Newbie Brad Smith was have a poor match. He had the ball out on the left in our half. For reasons I fail to understand, he decided to play a ball halfway between Andy Frampton and Chris Dunn. A perfect through ball for their striker to run onto. Thankfully, Dunn blocked the shot and saved our bacon.

I immediately replaced Brad with Fenlon.

A minute later, Michael Smith fell clutching his knee. I sent on Loveridge.

As a manager, this was the most depressing half of the season. We collapsed into parked bus formation and defended incompetently. Everyone was ball-watching. When we got the ball we couldn't do anything. Literally.

As I was standing on the sideline fuming about our poor performance, Hanks walked up next to me and handed me his phone. It was the live scores.

"Can you ****ing believe it?" he asked.

I couldn't. If we managed to hold on, all the other teams above us were losing. It made watching the last 20 minutes pure torture.

Fortunately, Rovers were just as poor as we were and the match ended 1-1.

"We got lucky today," I said once everyone was back in the locker room. "We should have lost. We've been working on several fundamental things like working hard for each other so we can play a short passing game. Today was horrible."

"And this is the strangest team talk I may ever give," I continued. "Because despite our horrid performance, we're in first because everybody around us dropped points or lost. ****ing unbelievable."

View attachment 398815
 
There are two things I like about this story. The first is the obvious, the amount of work and actual story telling put into it, miles above most other stories. The second is the way in which you work all those baffling and often annoying FM bugs into the story. That bit about the player freezing on the ball until relieved of it by the opposition. Seen it So. Many. Times.
 
kewlwarez said:
There are two things I like about this story. The first is the obvious, the amount of work and actual story telling put into it, miles above most other stories. The second is the way in which you work all those baffling and often annoying FM bugs into the story. That bit about the player freezing on the ball until relieved of it by the opposition. Seen it So. Many. Times.
Click to expand...

Once again, thanks for reading.

The two other bugs that really make FM14 difficult and annoying are:

1. wingers, outside midfielders and fullbacks won't cross.
When any player beats a defender in either offensive corner, they NEVER curl in a cross. Instead, they dribble into the penalty box. Once in the box and EVEN if the easiest play is to chip in a little cross, they will
a) wait for a defender to come out and try to beat them (if they have good dribbling skills)
b) dawdle aimlessly if they aren't good dribblers then blast a shot with 3 defenders plus keeper in front of them.
c) try to bounce the ball off the defender and hope to get a corner.

2. Referee won't stop game for substitute.
If you have a substitute pending, DO NOT pause the game and make another sub. The game won't recognize the second sub. I've noticed that several times this season for Wimbledon that the ref won't recognize my sub. There doesn't seem to be any pattern.

The other weakness in FM14 is I can't configure a defender to stop a low near post corner or free kick. I get scored on fairly regularly because EVERYONE is out at the penalty spot or back post.

These are annoying bugs that didn't exist in FM12.
 
"I've got news," Gwen said after we've ordered our dinner. "I'm going to the south of France in early January for a photo shoot."

"That's great!" I replied.

"It's for the spring line for [company name redacted]," she continued. "We will be outside of Toulon and guess who's going to be the photographer?"

"Since I get to guess, it has to be John," I replied. As in John, the communications and tech guy for AFC Wimbledon.

"Mmm hmmm," she said. "This could be big. Just found out this afternoon. I'm so excited. I've only done local shoots and, let's face it, small-time shoots. This is the big time."

"Wow."

"Yeah, I know," she said. "I hardly know what to think."

"So John's going to be asking for some time off then?" I asked rhetorically. "Who knew that a simple case of stalking might actually turn into something good. BTW, you haven't seen stalker boy recently, have you?"

"Haven't seen the little ******* since when I called you to the bakery," she replied.
 
Sunday 7 December 2014 9AM

"I'd just like to note that nobody has requested that I get them a ticket until we announced that Vinnie Jones would be in town for the Accrington match," Assistant Manager Sean Hankin announced. "How do I go about getting them in?"

"I have no idea," I replied. "Better ask Erik. Let's start with Lil's report."

"Well, they're a pretty sad lot," Lil began. "They've been toward the bottom all season and yesterday's match against Walsall was dire. Ninety minutes I'll never get back."

"They play a 451 with wingers," Lil said. "But come on. I know everyone wants to be Barcelona, but this 451 fad is so tiresome if you don't have any quality. Sorry. Anyway, their wingers aren't particularly fast nor talented. Their lone striker is fast enough except for being rather useless. At any rate, I wasn't impressed."

"They got one defender, a Scottish lad, Tom Aldred who isn't too shabby, but the rest of the lot are bunch of slow-footed ball-watchers," Lil said. "Seriously, yesterday's match was really that bad."

"So, in summary, Vinnie picked the right weekend to visit," I said. Lil nodded.

"I want to focus on team cohesion," I said. "We'll need to work hard to break them down as I imagine they'll sit back and hope to cause trouble on the counter."

"Matteo Nole should be available for next weekend," Physio Jon Whitney said. "And Fabian Rowe should be back today from his flu."
 
"Enrico, may I have a word," Fabian Rowe said between drills.

"Sure, you feeling better? Energy back yet?" I asked.

"Yeah," he replied looking at this feet. Then he looked me in the eye. "I want a transfer. You're not treating me right and I want first team football."

"Really," I replied. I did not expect this. The kid's been playing well enough, showing a little promise but get's sick so we tell him to stay away until his flu has run it's course. "You've been demanding **** since you got here. You don't work hard in training and yet expect me to put you straight into the first team ahead of guys who work their ***** off for me. When injuries give you an opportunity, you play alright."

"Sure, I'll gladly sell your entitled *** as soon as I can," I said pulling out my iPhone. "But here's how it works. You train with the reserves. Yes, that's right. The reserves. And you'll note that we don't have a reserve team. So go shower and get the **** out of here. I don't want to see you again."

"But ..." he started to say.

"Get the **** out of my sight and take your sense of entitlement with you," I spat out at him.

Then I used my phone to do all the necessary paperwork to put him on the transfer market.
 
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