The Alfa Romeo Metaphor

League One: Oxford United FC v. AFC Wimbledon

View attachment 341960It's a chilly October evening so I'm decked out in my parka. I've got my club scarf on but not wrapped tight. My hat is in my pocket just in case.

Jason Banton just has a sore neck. Whits says we should have the chiropractor we work with adjust him tomorrow after the swelling has subsided a bit. Steven Gregory and Martin Riley are out. Matteo Ricci needs a rest so Mark Byrne will play alongside Leandro Depetris. Like I said, Dylan Griffiths gets his first start.

The stadium is about a third full and there a good number of Wombles who have traveled up to Oxford.

Not much happened in the opening 10 minutes. The Griff shot right at the keeper and Andrea Sbraga collided with their striker Kyle Copp and came away hobbling. Play didn't stop or anything but Sbraga was obviously in pain.

In the 20th minute, Leandro curled a ball out to Matteo Nole on the left sideline. Nole beat his fullback and raced for the corner flag. He whipped in a beautiful cross perfectly into the path of Griff. Griff hits his volley cleanly and I'm raising my arms when the keeper tips it round the post.

Dang.

In the 35th minute, Leandro plays a pass up to Griff. Griff holds it up nicely then gives it right back to Leandro. Nole, Mark Byrne and George Francomb have all advanced up into gaps during this exchange. Leandro plays it up to George who one-times his pass into the middle to Griff. Griff draws two defenders and plays a ball behind the right fullback for George to run onto.

George sees Nole's back post run and delivers the cross right into Nole's path. Nole is too eager and overruns it a bit but manages to whack the cross with his thigh into the net!

0-1

Nole's first goal for AFC Wimbledon. Took for-freaking-ever but it finally arrived. Nole runs over to the Wombles behind the net to celebrate.

Right after the restart, Oxford's Chris Birchall chopped down Leandro rather viciously. Leandro rolls around on the pitch a couple of times, tries to get up then sits down.

As you can probably guess, I'm screaming ****** murder about red cards and violent conduct at the ref then moaning at the fourth official. I know you're going to be shocked, but the only reaction I get is the fourth official tells me to calm down and go sit down.

I wave Mark Byrne over.

"Yeah, boss," Byrne says.

"Take out Birchall since the ref won't," I say. "Spread the word."

Byrne walks over to Mark Tomlinson. Andrea Sbraga and Manny Smith come over. They talk briefly. Eventually, Leandro limps off with supported by Whits and Griff. I send on Matteo Ricci to replace him.

A few minutes later we win a corner. Manny is standing directly behind Birchall. George whips in a cross and Manny pushes Birchall into the path of the onrushing Sbraga. This is in the middle of the mixer so it's a mosh pit anyway, but the ref whistles Sbraga for running poor Birchall over.

My foursome in the middle spend the remainder of the first half giving Birchall the special sauce. Ricci even got in a good kick to his shins.

With time winding down in the half, Nole played a pass to the overlapping Brad Smith. Brad looks up, looks down and drills his cross right at the keeper. I spin a full 360 with both hands over my face. He had Griff making a near post run and George at the far post. What a waste.

Sbraga wins the punt back upfield and Ricci zips a pass up to Griff. Griff smashes a shot to the keeper's right. It looks good but the keeper dives and gets to it. The ball bounces right into the path of Nole. Will it be two in one game after such a long drought?

NO!!! The left fullback slides in and clears Nole's shot off the line.

At half time, I warned my players not to get complacent in the second half. Griff was looking agitated and distressed about his inability to score. I told him to relax and let it flow. He smiled, nodded and seemed to calm down a bit.

Birchall does not come out for the second half.

Not long after the restart, Ricci played a ball down the right sideline for George to chase. He whipped in a cross. It wasn't his best. But Griff and the keeper were in a race for it about 2 yards from the near post. The keeper dives for it as Griff reachs for it with his left foot. It's hard to tell if Griff managed to back heel it toward his trailing right leg or the keeper fumbled it. But Griff was looking down between his legs and did a sort of behind-the-back side foot shot that bobbled over the keeper and into the net!

0-2

First start and first goal for the young man!

Oxford players swarm the ref complaining about offsides and keeper interference. He waves them all away but not before lecturing their Captain. His lecture even included a severe finger wagging.

It was at this point we quit playing. Oxford were without any hope so they didn't realize it for some 20 minutes or so. It all started with giving the Us there first chance of the game which Lincoln fumbled for a corner. A few minutes later after this first chance and Oxford has us running around on defense. Tomlinson eventually gets fed up and chops down Birchall's replacement Simon Mensing. He gets up shouting at his teammates to "wake the **** up."

Lincoln has trouble with the direct shot from the free kick. I'm not sure why. It was from long range and he reacted like he didn't see it until late. He managed to get a hand down and block it. Manny cleared it to safety.

With my keeper shaky behind them, my defense proceeded to try to do everything to give away the 3 points. My midfielders suddenly are incapable of stringing more than two passes together at a time. Luckily, we were playing Oxford United who are in the relegation zone for a reason.

In the 83rd minute, Byrne gives the ball away at midfield. Oxford quickly played a long ball behind Manny for their striker John Constable to chase. Manny wasn't paying attention and Constable got the drop on him. He lined up his shot and didn't hit it all that well but it managed to sneak under Lincoln's armpit as he went down.

1-2

Hope for Oxford. I'm ****ing fuming. Rather than making a spectacle of myself and screaming at my players, I begin pacing up and down my technical area.

Our passing gets worse but someone always manages to intervene with a desperation tackle to prevent any real chances. Our play is getting embarrassing, though. I'm getting more and more angry.

The fourth official signals 3 minutes of extra time. Can we survive? Maybe. Oxford are that incompetent. But we try our best to give the points away.

In the 92nd minute, they break down our left after we give them the ball. I have my hands over my face and I'm looking through my fingers. Thankfully, Lincoln comes to his senses and snares the cross.

Lincoln rolls the ball out to Jim Fenlon, my left back. Fens has loads of options. Nole is up the line. Byrne is inside and jogging towards him to take a pass. He could play it square to Manny. He could even play it back to Lincoln. Instead, he waits for the defender to run up. At this point he realizes he's in trouble and kicks the ball out of bounds gifting Oxford the ball deep in our half.
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At this point I'm just standing there, hands in my pockets, expecting the equalizer. We really are playing that bad.

But the Oxford player dilly-dallies over the throw. His teammates aren't doing much to get open. He eventually throws it in and Fens lunges in and kicks it right back out of bounds. They do a better job of inbounding the ball, but they end up passing the ball backwards until they have it in their own half. Sbraga clears two of the three long balls and Manny clears the last one.

I'm keeping an eye on the ref and on play. I see the ref check his watch. I see substitute midfielder Stuart Lewis catch Manny's clearance on the short hop and unleash a heat seeking missile bound for the upper corner to the left of Lincoln.

I realize I'm crouching down in anguish, expecting it to rip the netting clean off. Instead, Lincoln comes flying across the net and manages to tip it over the bar.

The ref looks at his watch and let's Oxford take the corner. After Lincoln snares the cross, he blows three long blasts on his whistle and ends my agony.

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Enrico Pucci @enricopucci 21 Oct 15
Congrats to @MatteoNole and @SmithManny for making the Sky Bet League One
Team of the Week wimb.le.don/U4eK4y #Wimbledon #TOTW
 
For once there were manager job openings and I was not among the likely candidates. What a ****ing relief.

I should give you an update on the new flat. All we managed to do on Saturday was get in a fight about the layout of the living room, make-up and then get the bed set up. On Sunday, we talked more about the living room and both made some concessions. Well, mainly I made a number of concessions. You know how it is. Or maybe you don't. Let me explain it this way: if a man is alone in the woods, is he still wrong? Alright, I'll admit that I'm a little bit grumpy about not getting my way and being a wee bit cynical.

Then I struck upon a brilliant idea.

"Why don't we get one or two of your gay friends over," I suggested. "Have them suggest what we ought to do with the living room and go with whatever they say. They have more style in their pinky fingers than we do."

"Hmmm," Gwen grunted but she eventually agreed.

So on Monday, we got my den mostly set up. My old TV is in here along with one of those freakishly comfortable scandinavian ergonomical chairs and matching couch. I hope I hung the TV right. It'd suck if it came tumbling down.

The dining room was easier as the table goes in the middle. Duh. Much less possibilities for disagreement about where to put the dining room table so on Tuesday morning I put it together and we unwrapped the chairs.

Tuesday, Greg and Aaron stopped over to assess our living room and make their recommendations. It went well. I kept my big yap shut and let them talk it all over with Gwen. In the end the three of them settled on a lay-out.

"But seriously, Gwen," Greg said. "What's missing is that you have these vast empty walls. They need something on them."

"He's got a point," Aaron concurred. "And I'm not talking some Monet print ****. No, you need some big pieces by some local artists."

"Yeah, something edgy, something modern," Greg added. "Some pieces to pull this all together."

"And I hope you two have some suggestions about where we should look?" Gwen said. "Or should I have my Mum along for that."

"Ooh," Aaron said. "I'd completely forgotten about Mumsy."

"Yes, talk to Mum," Greg concurred.
 
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League One: AFC Wimbledon v. Burton Albion FC

View attachment 341592Tuesday I was prepared for winter, today I'll sit in the dugout and try not to feel the need to harass the fourth official -- it's raining. It's been raining all day. This is the England that I expected when I took the job.

Mark Byrne and Leandro Depetris need to rest and Jason Banton is fit again so I moved Matteo Nole into the middle of the park. Also, I told Jason to shoot more. We'll see how that works out. My Chief Scout Lil Fuccillo tells me they'll play a 4141 so my central midfield trio will mark their trio.

"We tied against these guys twice last year," I said to begin my pre-game talk. "As many of you will recall, we let a three goal lead slip away. Now after how bad we played at the end of Tuesday's game, I don't want to see any of that **** today. Clear? Okay. We just have to relax and play our game. Get in their faces, don't give them any time on the ball. Let them hoof it forward, Andrea and Manny will eat that weak-*** **** up all day long. When we have the ball, relax and keep the ball moving. Don't be a hero with the ****ing Hollywood ball, keep it simple. We're playing great, we're on a great run, I have faith we'll keep it going."

So much for staying in the dugout. By the fifth minute, I'm out in the rain yelling at Nole and Ricci (the Matteo brothers) to mark tighter. Burton are just walzing straight through the middle of the park.

"Hey, don't get us wet," Assistant Manager Sean Hankin says as i set down next to him.

"Oh, terribly sorry," I apologize and flick some water off my dome onto him.

In the 20th minute, we clear a corner and Nole picks up the ball. He takes off with it up the left flank. He nimbly evades a cynical rugby tackle attempt and has acres of empty space ahead of him. Everyone piles forward. As he nears the box he tries a shoulder fake on the Burton player who has just sprinted back. He bites and Nole takes off for the corner flag. He doesn't play in the greatest crosses and looks down at the turf in disgust.

The ball is slightly behind Ricci so instead of trying to control it, he deflects back upfield and into the path of the hard-charging Mark Tomlinson. Mark steps into it and crushes it. It doesn't hit anybody and bulges the back of the net.

1-0

Another first! Mark's first goal! The entire bench empties and we're all jumping up and down and shouting and generally carrying on like we've won the Cup or something.

Burton respond by bringing the ball down into our end and set up camp. After a couple of minutes of pressure, we finally get the ball but Nole passes right to a Burton player as we're trying to work the ball into the opponent's half. Andrew Tutte hoofs a long ball over Sbraga's head. Their lone forward Billy Kee sprints after it. Kee isn't exactly what you would call quick or fast. So Manny easily catches him. Kee shoots high as Manny arrives.

The game falls into a rhythm of we work the ball upfield into the Burton half, lose possession and Burton hoof it long trying to catch Manny or Sbraga napping. This makes for rather dull football. But what the ****, we're winning.

"You need to have a word with Nole," Hanks says as we walk to the locker room. "His passing is embarrassing."

I have Leandro up and warming up to start the second half. This only makes Nole more nervous apparently, as he gives the ball away in the 46th and 47th minutes. So at the 48th minute, I replace him with Leandro. Ricci moves back to play alongside Tomlinson and Leandro plays in the hole.

In the 52nd minute, Burton right winger Ryan Flynn smashes a drive against the post and out for a goal kick.

In the 62nd minute, George races down the right flank. I look across and Michael is heading towards the near post and Jason is heading towards the back door. Michael smashes the volley home and everyone starts celebrating.

2-0

Everyone except George. He is begging and pleading with the linesman who has his flag up. Dagnabbit, offside.

1-0

Now Ricci is starting to look gassed. I replace him with Mark Byrne. The two Marks will protect our lead.

In the 71st minute, Mark Tomlinson has the ball on the Burton side of the center circle. He's facing the left half of the pitch but doesn't have any options over there. He spins and zips a pass out to George. Here we go again. George races past the fullback and whips in a cross. Michael comes storming through and smashes another volley into the back of the net.

Everyone in the stadium looks over at the linesman. George has his hands up to pantomime 'Well then?' The linesman has his arms at his sides and it's a goal!

2-0

A minute later, George and Michael do the same routine. As the ball nestles into the back of the net yet again, everyone looks over at the linesman. His flag is up. George just shakes his head and trudges back toward our half.

In the 76th minute, Jack Dyer dives in with a high tackle and studs up from behind Leandro. He got all Leandro, no ball. Leandro is lying there on the ground screaming as I launch myself toward the fourth official. I'm not even going to bother with the ref.

"Please explain how that wasn't a red card, please?" I ask politely.

Crickets.

"I am asking you a question," I continue. "I want an explanation. How is that Dyer isn't walking toward the showers right now?"

"He got the ball," the fourth official replied.

"Give it a break, Enrico," Sturrock said. "You're winning."

"So now that we're winning, there's no need to protect the players from studs up tackles?" I ask rhetorically. "Did the FIFA manual change and nobody let me know? And, by the way, no he did not get the ball. The force of his studs up, ankle-high tackle moved Leandro's leg causing the ball to roll."

View attachment 341591"I'm reporting you clowns to the FA," I continued. "That was clear malicious intent and you all are not doing your **** jobs."

"Watch yourself, Enrico," the fourth official warned.

"I'll stop moaning when you all start doing your jobs and start protecting my players," I replied. "I want it noted in the match report that I am officially complaining to the FA and that you are not calling the rules of the game and protecting my players."

I felt two sets of hands grab me from behind by the arms and shoulders and pull me back. I knew this would be goalkeeping coach Paul Rachubka and Alex Inglethorpe who replaced Hanks on the Drag-The-Manager-Away-From-A-Possible-Fight/Conflagration squad because he's a lot bigger than Hanks.

"You can let go now, I'll go sit down and be a good boy," I said after they'd dragged me ten or so yards.

I was out of midfielders. So I sent on Andy Frampton to play defensive midfield and switch to a 4141 formation.

That was until Michael just tipped over clutching his knee in the 89th minute. ****, **** and God **** it all. Just when he'd started scoring.

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Sunday, 25 October 2015

So I'll start out with the most depressing part which could actually be worse. Michael Smith has strained his knee ligaments in his right knee. To try and think positively about this, he doesn't need ACL surgery. But he will be out until January at the earliest.

The question is can James Loveridge carry the load. Lovers has so much potential but he's not working at it like I want. He's not doing extra training and hasn't really improved since he signed in the summer of 2014. And it's not just me. My coaches corroborate what I'm seeing. I left it until late to sign him last spring and only offered him an extension when he had a great spring.

My other options are Jason Banton and Dylan Griffiths.

This might be the Griff's big chance. Then again, it might not. He's got a quick first step, but he's not fast. He's getting better at being the Target Man and doing the link up play that Michael does so well. He's got his first start and his first goal under his belt so anything's possible.

Jason can play with either foot, he's fast and he's shown a decent enough scoring touch. He'll probably do fine up top. It comes down to the long-term: I want Griff and eventually Chris Williams once he arrives in January to get their chances.

Michael and Lovers are not my long-term strikers. I don't think they can play in the Championship. Griff and Williams have the potential to be Premiership strikers. We'll see how this develops. Don't be surprised if Michael and Lovers are on the bench come the end of the season.

Also, we found out who we'll be facing in the First Round of the FA Cup: Kidderminster or Tamworth. Both clubs are in the Conference.

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AWESOME STORY! You have a very entertaining Wrtiting Style.
Keep it up !
 
View attachment 340741I had to get out of the flat. Gwen was organizing it and was going to drive me bat****. So I hopped in the Alfa and drove up to Tamworth, a wee bit northwest of Birmingham, to see them play Kidderminster in their FA Cup replay. We'd be playing the winner.

It made me remember that i don't drive all that much. The Alfa is really fun to drive, so responsive. It's just too bad that it's cool and drizzling or I'd have the top down. I guess it is almost November.

Anyhoo, the Lamb Ground is tiny. While it's only a thousand seats smaller than Kingsmeadow, but it just feels smaller. I buy a ticket, get some popcorn and a cup of tea and find my seat. I'm right near the edge of the covered, main stand and my seat's damp. Since the stadium is only half full, I wander over toward the middle of the stand and find a empty seat where I'll remain dry regardless.

Both teams are in the Conference, the Skrill Premier League, and the quality difference between League One sides and them is obvious. First, there's the speed. From footspeed to speed of thought, League One is just quicker. And League One is markedly slower than the Premier League.

Or to put it in other terms as the wet, boring first half grinds to it's inevitable, moist conclusion, my Wimbledon squad is faster than either team and our passing should tear them to shreds.

View attachment 340740 Soon after the break, the Kidderminster right back hoofs a speculative ball forward. The Tamworth center back misjudges it and it gets over his head. Half time substitute Ryan Rowe gambled that he'd miss it and nicely controlled the 50 yard kick and hit a decent shot into the keeper's upper right corner.

0-1

Kidderminster kept pressing and were rewarded on the hour mark. A cross from their left back was headed clear and Alex Smith thumped a shot goalward from 25 yards. It looked like the Tamworth keeper didn't see it until late. As the ball sailed past the last defender, he flailed at it to no avail. The ball hit the underside of the crossbar, hit the poor keeper in the back of the head and went in.

0-2

I'd seen enough. If we mark their central midfielders tightly, they won't be able to do **** against us. I can't see our defenders having any trouble with this lot. This FA Cup tie will be a good opportunity to rest some players. Not to sound overconfident or anything.
 
League One: Tranmere Rovers FC v. AFC Wimbledon

[editor's note: sorry folks, I'm unable to upload pics. I'll upload them as soon as possible]

We were on the bus early today to catch the train up to Liverpool. Our bus from the train station arrived in plenty of time for us to mentally get off the bus as well. Tranmere are 7th and victory over us might put them into the play-off places.

Our voices echoed around an empty Prenton Park as we warmed up. It seats over 15K, but had a mere thousand in it during warm-ups. 500 of the people in the stadium were Wombles getting some beers in and the vocal cords warmed up.

I told my players to relax because we were the underdogs and nobody expected us to come here and take the points.

The stadium was only a third full as we walked out for the kick-off. The Wombles sounded really loud in the Cowshed end of the stadium.

The game got off to a dull splat. Inside four minutes, the Rover's physio was out to treat their right midfielder John Bostock. It was all stops and starts, missed passes and poor control from both sides. And it started to **** on us. Gusts of wind occasionally drove the misty rain right into your face or down the back of your neck. At least it was warmish.

The first real shot in anger occurred in the 26th minute when the ever-young, but not quite so quick anymore Matthew Etherington crushed a shot that grazed the crossbar.

In the 38th minute, our hard work pressuring Rovers finally paid off. Mark Byrne, George Francomb and Matteo Ricci forced a turnover. George tapped it to Ricci who started jogging forward with it looking for options. Rovers just backpedaled. Their left back failed to notice George's 30 yard sprint. How he failed to notice this I'll never understand, but he was nonetheless shocked when the pass that Ricci hit rolled right into George's path. George's first touch wasn't good, but I could tell he was going to shoot regardless of the angle.

He absolutely smote it. Howitzer. Tomahawk missile. Nearly broke the sound barrier. Rover's keeper wasn't tight enough to the post and let it get over his shoulder. Not that he had much time to react as George was only 10 yards away.

0-1

The only sound in the stadium aside from a few groans were the Wombles in the opposite end going nuts, Tranmere manager Gary McAllister kicked the turf and looked displeased. I wonder how many times they'd talked with their left back Andrew Halliday about not ball-watching. Halliday was moaning at the linesman for missing the call.

We did a nice job of keeping possession and harassing Tranmere into giving it back when we lost it. It looked like we were going to play out a boring first half and go into the locker room up a goal.

Until Ricci decided to lose his mind and make the game more interesting. He held onto the ball inside the center despite having plenty of options. When the pressure came, I could tell that he wanted to roll the defender and head upfield. But he suddenly panicked and decided to play a back pass to Manny Smith. Except the pass was nowhere near Manny. Ricci hit it hard enough that it looked like a back pass to Daniel Lincoln. Manny jogged back pointing to the ball and yelling for Lincoln to get it. Except Lincoln just stood there. I swear I heard Rover's striker Harry Cardwell say 'thank you very much' as he sprinted past Manny for the loose ball which was now entering our box. Thankfully, his first touch let him down and he ended up shooting from a bad angle and Lincoln blocked it out for a corner.

Suddenly, we completely forgot how to play. Thankfully, the ref saved us by blowing for half time a bit early.

"What the **** was that?" I asked calmly once we were all in the locker room. "How is it that we all suddenly forgot how to play for those last two minutes of the half? Don't get complacent out there. Tranmere are a good side. A veteran side. They deserve to be level considering how badly we collectively lost our minds out there. I have faith that from here on out. From the restart, you will play smart, hard-working footie. Play the simple easy pass when you have it. Don't let yourself get into a situation in which you will panic. C'mon guys!"

In the 47th minute, Jason Banton lost control of the ball just over the half line. Matteo Nole came charging up to help. The two of them and two Rovers players all collided. Rover's Chris Lines crumpled to the turf. I think Nole ended up kneeing him right in the middle of the thigh. They stretchered Lines off. I had no idea Nole was such a thug!?!

From the restart, Rovers worked the ball down the right flank. Abdullai Bell-Baggie hit a long high cross towards the far side of the penalty area. Normally, you'd think this was an over-hit cross that would bounce across the far touch line. Nope, not this time. Matthew Etherington was standing there in acres of space and had plenty of time to line up his volley.

1-1

Cameron Dummigan had completely forgotten to check on where his man was. Oops. Etherington is a class player who isn't about to flub a volley when given that much time.

Tranmere then put us under pressure. We coped, but barely. Thankfully, Andrea Sbraga kept the defense organized and we just parked the bus and hoped for the onslaught to end.

Lovers wasn't doing much to help the team so I sent on Dylan Griffiths just after the hour mark. Tranmere were having no luck and finally, we managed to get the ball out of our defensive third and the game was mainly played in the middle of the park which was fine by me. I was perfectly content with coming away from this match with a draw.

In the 82nd minute, we had a throw deep in the right corner of Rover's half. Cam threw the ball back upfield to Nole. Nole gave it right back to him. Cam whipped in a cross which fell right to the feet of Griff. Griff heard Brad Smith's shout and rolled the ball into the path of the charging left fullback. Now, I'm not sure what inspired my left back to charge all the way into the box and to the right side of the goal, but I'm glad he did. When I think about it, it might have been his parents in the Cowshed watching him play.

1-2

He had half of the net to shoot at from 6 yards and he didn't miss. The players all charged the Cowshed to celebrate with their fans.

Rovers worked hard but were too eager to peg us back. Sbraga took advantage of their eagerness and caught them offside about 5 times in the last 5 minutes to seal the victory. Those were some big points against a possible play-off contender. We had quite a celebration on the train ride to London.
 
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I want to apologize for the lack of updates. I'm having major internet connectivity issues. I'm switching providers and should be online Thursday with a slew of updates.
 
Rog: Davo, enough of this doom and gloom. Here at Men in Blazers, we don't just discuss how **** everything is.



Michael: Is it possible to do a group hug on a podcast?


Rog: With the technical innovations available to us, no. But don't let that bring you down, Davo. We'll just talk about something that will warm everyone's heart.


Michael: We love a heart-warming story.


Rog: Specifically, we're going to talk about the club that nobody can hate, AFC Wimbledon. The team founded by the fans after Wimbledon FC moved to Milton Keynes.


Michael: Risen from the ashes, Rog.


Rog: They joined the Combined Counties League in 2002. As far down into the depths of English football as you can possibly get. They held try-outs, Davo, try-outs to put together their first squad.


Michael: They had nothing except hope.


Rog: This began a climb up through the leagues. They clawed their way up into the Conference and in 2011 won promotion into League football.


Michael: I'm getting teary just listening to you.


Rog: Their current manager is on the line with us right now to discuss the latest with Wimbledon and their maiden season in League One.


Michael: We'd like to offer a special Men in Blazers welcome to Enrico Pucci. How are you, Enrico?


Enrico: I'm good. It's great to talk to you two again.


Michael: So let's just start off and get the important things out of the way first, you're a baldy, right?


Enrico: I am.


Rog: As you may or may not know, hair is a really important topic for us.


Michael: Mainly due to our genetic lack of much of any of it. Please tell us and our listeners about the history of your hair and the current lack thereof.


Enrico: When I played in Serie A, I proudly wore a wild mop of curly hair. But on the day I was to interview for what turned out to be my first manager job, I walked past a store window and saw my reflection. I think that the next storefront was a barbershop. So I walked in to get a haircut and the barber insisted I shave it all off. I was losing a bit on the top. I got the job and the rest is history.


Rog: Wow. Wow. Right before the interview. That's brave. Commendable, too. Did you ever thank that barber for the assist?


Enrico: Yes, in fact, we've become good friends and we stay in touch. Esteban founded the first Spanish Wimbledon Fan Club.


Michael: Football really has become a global game when even a League One team has an international fan base.


Rog: In case any GFOP out there doesn't know, Enrico is an American of Italian extraction. You have dual citizenship isn't that correct?


Enrico: True.


Rog: Who finagled himself a try-out with Bologna and ended up playing for them in their first team for six seasons. That first manager job was with Cadiz in the south of Spain.


Enrico: They sacked me.


Michael: Enrico, this is supposed to be an uplifting, the uplifting part of the show.


Enrico: Well, they did.


Rog: But your record with Cadiz was quite admirable. You had a winning record, were in with a shout for a play-off spot. Right?


Enrico: The main requirement was that I get into the playoffs. I'd been called in front of the board because, well, they were worried. I explained that in the ten or so matches we had left, I needed to win six to get into the playoffs. When we lost an away match to the league leaders, which I'd told them I didn't need to win to make the playoffs, the sacked me. Well, one of my players told me. They read about it online on the bus ride home.


Michael: Wait. Paul Carr is going to save us.


Rog: Paul Carr blows your mind, Paul Carr blows your mind.


Michael: Here's an interesting statistic. You've won fifty percent of your matches. Plus, you've drawn a decent percentage. Your ratios are the same at both Cadiz and Wimbledon.


Rog: So we'll let you, Enrico, tell us about what is happening with Wimbledon.


Enrico: Well, first off we won the League Two so we're in League One this season. We just finished upgrading our training facility and we'll be moving back to Wimbledon into our spiritual home on Plough Lane starting next season.


Rog: Just up the street from the original stadium location, correct?


Enrico: Yes.


Michael: Go on, how's this season going? No struggles adapting to the new league?


Enrico: We added some pretty talented young men to our squad this year and no, we're kicking some ****.


Rog: Wimbledon sit fourth in the table which is a playoff spot. So it could return full circle inside fifteen years. Fifteen years after the owner complained that they couldn't build a new stadium and needed to move the team, you'll be moving Wimbledon back to Wimbledon proper into a new stadium.


Michael: And possibly while playing in the Championship. Is there no ceiling to your ambitions, Enrico? Can anyone or anything stop you?


Enrico: Heh, I don't know about that. We just need to keep our head's down and keep working. The players have bought into the system.


Rog: So humble. That's a positive, too. Now as you may know we really like the demonstrative managers.


Michael: Miguel Ernesto Herrera, Mexican National Team Manager, is a particular hero of ours. We've been fans of his since the 2014 World Cup.


Rog: And we've seen the highlights of you on the sideline.


Michael: We're impressed.


Rog: Talk to us about your demeanor, give some insights into your demeanor on the sideline.


Enrico: Ohmygod. Um ... actually, my girlfriend pointed out just the other day that I often look like a manic ape. I mean, she said it nicer than that, but, ya know, I'm uh I'm uh I'm not really sure what I'm doing out there. Recently, I've been trying to be more calm.


Michael: Did she suggest anything?


Enrico: No, she just said she thinks I'm cute when I get mad at the refs.


Rog: To me, and I hope you'll pardon me for suggesting this, it sounds like she approves.


Michael: And as everyone knows, we don't do much of anything without getting our wives approval.


Rog: Don't change that, Enrico. We love a manager who kicks every ball and cavorts around with maniacal glee when his side score.


Enrico: Last match it was raining and cold, that prototypical English weather. So I had additional motivation to just sit on the bench like a real bench boss, like a leader of men, you know, calm yet fierce.


Rog: And that lasted ...


Enrico: Five minutes. I was out there, flailing away, shouting at my midfielders.


Michael: Well something is obviously working, Enrico.


Rog: Thanks for joining us and don't go changing.


Enrico: Always a pleasure to talk to you guys.
 
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