Minnows No More 2015 - Story and Bios Thread
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Bowieinspace26
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David Jeronimo, the Faroese reincarnation of Goliath. Son of two professional basketball players, David developed the ability to flatten strikers from an early age while playing for his local under 5s kick around side. He later developed an ability to locate the ball. However his 'good touch for a big man' reputation, and silky passing skills are hindered by his inability to see anything further than the halfway line. His biggest issue however, is his love for the easy life. David realised early on, when he was measured at a whopping 6ft 8 inches tall at only 14 years old, his arms were easily long enough to reach the tv remote from as far away as the bedroom, and this didn't help his determination to succeed. None the less, he's managed ten appearances for his first professional club of Helsingborg, and has already hospitalised 57 opposition players and 23 supporters.
David Jeronimo, the Faroese reincarnation of Goliath. Son of two professional basketball players, David developed the ability to flatten strikers from an early age while playing for his local under 5s kick around side. He later developed an ability to locate the ball. However his 'good touch for a big man' reputation, and silky passing skills are hindered by his inability to see anything further than the halfway line. His biggest issue however, is his love for the easy life. David realised early on, when he was measured at a whopping 6ft 8 inches tall at only 14 years old, his arms were easily long enough to reach the tv remote from as far away as the bedroom, and this didn't help his determination to succeed. None the less, he's managed ten appearances for his first professional club of Helsingborg, and has already hospitalised 57 opposition players and 23 supporters.
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Simone Simoncelli
Born 25th November 1994 is this Sammarinese 14 year old Centre Back come Striker about to take the world by storm?
Simone hails from the small Sammarinese municipality of Montegiardino of which there are only 910 inhabitants. His father is a Sammarinese Fishermen and his mother a failed Opera singer. Simone grew up playing Football on the streets of Montegiardino and due to his country's poor standing in the Footballing world his road to the professional game was not an easy one.
However luck was to change in 2012 when while at a Sammarinese youth tournament he was spotted by scouts of Italian team Empoli. Naturally a Centre Back but due to his height and physical presence he has been asked on occasion to lead the line as a Targetman throughout his young career. This has lead some to believe that paired with his exceptional determination levels that Simone Simmoncelli could possibly become a mainstay of the San Marino National team and perhaps one day play for one of Europes Elite.
Simone Simoncelli
Born 25th November 1994 is this Sammarinese 14 year old Centre Back come Striker about to take the world by storm?
Simone hails from the small Sammarinese municipality of Montegiardino of which there are only 910 inhabitants. His father is a Sammarinese Fishermen and his mother a failed Opera singer. Simone grew up playing Football on the streets of Montegiardino and due to his country's poor standing in the Footballing world his road to the professional game was not an easy one.
However luck was to change in 2012 when while at a Sammarinese youth tournament he was spotted by scouts of Italian team Empoli. Naturally a Centre Back but due to his height and physical presence he has been asked on occasion to lead the line as a Targetman throughout his young career. This has lead some to believe that paired with his exceptional determination levels that Simone Simmoncelli could possibly become a mainstay of the San Marino National team and perhaps one day play for one of Europes Elite.
Bio
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Originally from England, Lucock moved to San Marino at the young age of 3 years old with his parents after they craved a change of scenery, after playing for various school teams and sunday league sides, Lucock traveled to Italy to take his chances at the youth trial day that Cagliari had set up. Impressing the coaches there, he secured himself a long term contract with I Rossoblu.
Determined to make a name for himself on the professional stage, Lucock also wants to contribute to the development of the San Marino national team, which he has developed a passion for since moving to the country.
Originally from England, Lucock moved to San Marino at the young age of 3 years old with his parents after they craved a change of scenery, after playing for various school teams and sunday league sides, Lucock traveled to Italy to take his chances at the youth trial day that Cagliari had set up. Impressing the coaches there, he secured himself a long term contract with I Rossoblu.
Determined to make a name for himself on the professional stage, Lucock also wants to contribute to the development of the San Marino national team, which he has developed a passion for since moving to the country.
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Daniele Del Conte was born in the capital city of San Marino, unimaginatively named San Marino as well, in September of 1999. As the son of a preacher man, Daniele soon found that contrary to the popular country song, it was not his destiny, but instead that it was to play football. Or be an artist. Or a musician. Or a race car driver. Daniele found it hard to concentrate on pretty much any one thing, but eventually he found himself scouted for the Serie A side Sassuolo's youth setup.
A born leader, even if distracted by pretty much anything, the young playmaker could potentially have the world at his feet, if only he could keep his mind on the game. But, never ask him to take a penalty in a shootout.
...Oh look, they're selling pies at half time!
Daniele Del Conte was born in the capital city of San Marino, unimaginatively named San Marino as well, in September of 1999. As the son of a preacher man, Daniele soon found that contrary to the popular country song, it was not his destiny, but instead that it was to play football. Or be an artist. Or a musician. Or a race car driver. Daniele found it hard to concentrate on pretty much any one thing, but eventually he found himself scouted for the Serie A side Sassuolo's youth setup.
A born leader, even if distracted by pretty much anything, the young playmaker could potentially have the world at his feet, if only he could keep his mind on the game. But, never ask him to take a penalty in a shootout.
...Oh look, they're selling pies at half time!
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Originally known as Mason Snow due to the fact that noone actually knows who his legitimate father is, Mason is most likely the ******* child of the great Carlos Valderrama, a theory Mr. Valderrama had always denied due to not wanting to pay child support. Mason and his mother had regularly fought court battles to try and get some child support money from Mr. Valderrama but with not even enough money to pay for a paternity test to get any proof, Mason and his mother were left broke for a long time. Eventually Mason started to show real promise as a footballer in a somewhat similar mould to his famous "father" and Valderrama came calling asking Mason to choose to play for Colombia and he would pay all the back dated child support and accept him as his son.
Mason, unbeknownst to Carlos Valderrama, taped the conversation of him admitting to be Mason's father, sued him for $4million and then said he would choose the Faroe Islands, his mother's country of birth but the last name Valderrama as it is more recognizable and just simply cooler than Snow. Just after this, in 2014 he was snapped up by Djurgarden and quickly made an impression due to his awesome last name and playmaking abilities
Originally known as Mason Snow due to the fact that noone actually knows who his legitimate father is, Mason is most likely the ******* child of the great Carlos Valderrama, a theory Mr. Valderrama had always denied due to not wanting to pay child support. Mason and his mother had regularly fought court battles to try and get some child support money from Mr. Valderrama but with not even enough money to pay for a paternity test to get any proof, Mason and his mother were left broke for a long time. Eventually Mason started to show real promise as a footballer in a somewhat similar mould to his famous "father" and Valderrama came calling asking Mason to choose to play for Colombia and he would pay all the back dated child support and accept him as his son.
Mason, unbeknownst to Carlos Valderrama, taped the conversation of him admitting to be Mason's father, sued him for $4million and then said he would choose the Faroe Islands, his mother's country of birth but the last name Valderrama as it is more recognizable and just simply cooler than Snow. Just after this, in 2014 he was snapped up by Djurgarden and quickly made an impression due to his awesome last name and playmaking abilities
Tiberio Mercuri, son of the simple lumberjack was born in the City of San Marino in October of 1999. He never liked football, his passion was cutting wood with Augusto, the father of Tiberio. One day teacher finally forced him to play a single football match with other kids. He just outmuscled everyone and scored many goals like it was nothing. Tiberio started to liked it, bah! He loved it. Few months later he showed great potential in sunday leagues, where one of the Cagliari's scouts approached him and told him that he is really impressed with his bravery on the pitch. With the invitation, Tiberio went to Sardinia where he met the Cagliari coach, Massimo Ficcadenti. He told him that Tiberio is an uncut gem of football, and he really want him in the U-18 squad. Mercuri decided to sign an youth contract. The young lumberjack has a bright future.
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Jonas Naterr - The Man Mountain from Vaduz
Jonas had a simple childhood, growing up in the heart of Vaduz with his brothers and sisters. Their parents died at a young age and they were taken in by Muay Thai masters (obviously lost) The children grew up learning the ways of "the art of 8 limbs" from their masters. After drinking what seemed like litres of growth hormones he grew to an enormous height and their masters or "Kru" decided he was too greater a threat for the other children and he had to train on his own.
He grew angry and aggressive (17) whilst on his own. He worked on his strength(11), agility(16) and balance(16). He was a brave boy (13) but his decisions were not the best(11).
After being in confinement from the others for so long he challenged their tyranny and attacked his masters. Unfortunately his Concentration(6) and Tendency to punch(7) were low and he was easily beaten. His technique(2) was so bad that he managed to beat himself in the eyes and nearly blind himself (vision 1)
He left his home and struggled to get any food to eat until he stumbled across Vaduz's youth team. There was a trial taking place, he stalked one of the lads and took him out before he made it and stole his jersey. The coaches noticed his size and assumed he was a keeper.
One kid tried to question where he came from....he was never seen again
Jonas Naterr - The Man Mountain from Vaduz
Jonas had a simple childhood, growing up in the heart of Vaduz with his brothers and sisters. Their parents died at a young age and they were taken in by Muay Thai masters (obviously lost) The children grew up learning the ways of "the art of 8 limbs" from their masters. After drinking what seemed like litres of growth hormones he grew to an enormous height and their masters or "Kru" decided he was too greater a threat for the other children and he had to train on his own.
He grew angry and aggressive (17) whilst on his own. He worked on his strength(11), agility(16) and balance(16). He was a brave boy (13) but his decisions were not the best(11).
After being in confinement from the others for so long he challenged their tyranny and attacked his masters. Unfortunately his Concentration(6) and Tendency to punch(7) were low and he was easily beaten. His technique(2) was so bad that he managed to beat himself in the eyes and nearly blind himself (vision 1)
He left his home and struggled to get any food to eat until he stumbled across Vaduz's youth team. There was a trial taking place, he stalked one of the lads and took him out before he made it and stole his jersey. The coaches noticed his size and assumed he was a keeper.
One kid tried to question where he came from....he was never seen again
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Nemanja Donnelly
The year is 2000 and the footballing world is looking for its next star to usher the game into this new century. Cometh the hour, cometh the man! And young Nemanja definitely came a man.....straight from his mother's womb at towering 6 ft 4 inches and scale tipping 13 st 12 lbs! At the age of 14 this determined youngster sent off for Madrid to put on his bravest face and go toe to toe with his idol, Ronaldo before realising he is lacking in bravery, chicken out and settle for Halmstad of Sweden instead.
The only crossing you'll see from Nemanja is his legs when he really has to pee. The boy can't even finish his sentences nevermind clear cut chances. He dribbled once, when he was 2 1/2 years old, but his mother soon wiped the drool away from his mouth. Nemanja is as fit as a fiddle.... if that fiddle was wrapped in bacon, dipped in chocolate and fried! He was substituted 5 mins into his trial match due to too much pyhsical exertion leaving him gasping for air. Halmstad had seen enough of his speed, finesse and power to offer him a contract. The coaching staff believe Nemanja can be the greatest defender possibly even greatest player of all time......
........once he gets his second wind!
Nemanja Donnelly
The year is 2000 and the footballing world is looking for its next star to usher the game into this new century. Cometh the hour, cometh the man! And young Nemanja definitely came a man.....straight from his mother's womb at towering 6 ft 4 inches and scale tipping 13 st 12 lbs! At the age of 14 this determined youngster sent off for Madrid to put on his bravest face and go toe to toe with his idol, Ronaldo before realising he is lacking in bravery, chicken out and settle for Halmstad of Sweden instead.
The only crossing you'll see from Nemanja is his legs when he really has to pee. The boy can't even finish his sentences nevermind clear cut chances. He dribbled once, when he was 2 1/2 years old, but his mother soon wiped the drool away from his mouth. Nemanja is as fit as a fiddle.... if that fiddle was wrapped in bacon, dipped in chocolate and fried! He was substituted 5 mins into his trial match due to too much pyhsical exertion leaving him gasping for air. Halmstad had seen enough of his speed, finesse and power to offer him a contract. The coaching staff believe Nemanja can be the greatest defender possibly even greatest player of all time......
........once he gets his second wind!
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Kevin Berger was born in Schaan in early 2000. His mother was a chef, his father owned the burger making company she worked for. They moved to the UK a year after Kevin's birth, with the plan of making a better life for their son.
In school Kevin was constantly teased as everyone mispronounced his surname (It's not burger!) but he found peace on the football pitch. He wound his way past defenders for fun, driven to prove them wrong. Yet as soon as he lost the ball he had no idea where to go to get it back and full backs could run past him at will (they don't because he's never in the right place).
Coaches were able to spot his potential early and he had a trial at lower league English clubs. What followed was an unimaginable experience - it started well enough but Kevin soon tired and it became even more obvious that he can't read a comic, let alone a pass from a teammate. He was quickly told he had no chance.
Bullied by everyone, and his father turning slowly more abusive, Kevin ran away to Switzerland as it was close to his homeland and no-one would think to look there. An adopted family took him in but was soon forced to move to Vaduz in Liechtenstein after the government introduced stricter laws on adoption.
He went to a trial with FC Vaduz and they saw his potential and gave him a youth contract. Having been through so much, can Kevin put all that behind him and focus on his football?
In school Kevin was constantly teased as everyone mispronounced his surname (It's not burger!) but he found peace on the football pitch. He wound his way past defenders for fun, driven to prove them wrong. Yet as soon as he lost the ball he had no idea where to go to get it back and full backs could run past him at will (they don't because he's never in the right place).
Coaches were able to spot his potential early and he had a trial at lower league English clubs. What followed was an unimaginable experience - it started well enough but Kevin soon tired and it became even more obvious that he can't read a comic, let alone a pass from a teammate. He was quickly told he had no chance.
Bullied by everyone, and his father turning slowly more abusive, Kevin ran away to Switzerland as it was close to his homeland and no-one would think to look there. An adopted family took him in but was soon forced to move to Vaduz in Liechtenstein after the government introduced stricter laws on adoption.
He went to a trial with FC Vaduz and they saw his potential and gave him a youth contract. Having been through so much, can Kevin put all that behind him and focus on his football?
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Mario Frick Jnr
Everyone knows of Mario Frick. The Liechtenstein legend, holder of 119 caps, and scorer of 16 goals. What everyone didn't know until now was the existence of one of his other sons, Mario Jnr. Having partied a little too hard after scoring against Germany, Mario was caught in the act. Quite literally, the press had a field day. The indiscretion was buried, the son forgotten about.
Until now. With a steely determination and resolve to better his careless father, Mario Jnr upped sticks and went to Aarau, signing a youth contract with them. With a keen eye for finishing, and very capable of running around, he is seen as a good prospect. Unfortunately, Jnr has a fear of heights, and refuses to jump anywhere at all. That, combined with an unique ability to not pay attention to anything at any time, and the fact that he is an 11st pushover, could severely undermine him.
Can Mario Jnr put his father in the shade? Can he be the true hero of Liechtenstein?
Mario Frick Jnr
Everyone knows of Mario Frick. The Liechtenstein legend, holder of 119 caps, and scorer of 16 goals. What everyone didn't know until now was the existence of one of his other sons, Mario Jnr. Having partied a little too hard after scoring against Germany, Mario was caught in the act. Quite literally, the press had a field day. The indiscretion was buried, the son forgotten about.
Until now. With a steely determination and resolve to better his careless father, Mario Jnr upped sticks and went to Aarau, signing a youth contract with them. With a keen eye for finishing, and very capable of running around, he is seen as a good prospect. Unfortunately, Jnr has a fear of heights, and refuses to jump anywhere at all. That, combined with an unique ability to not pay attention to anything at any time, and the fact that he is an 11st pushover, could severely undermine him.
Can Mario Jnr put his father in the shade? Can he be the true hero of Liechtenstein?
Biography of Abdon Claude
Abdon Claude
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Passing By
"The more possession you have, the better the chance of you winning," said Mrs. Claude, Abdon's mother, while they were watching a football match together. Young Abdon was only 5 at the time, but that saying has stayed with him ever since.
Abdon was born in a family that loves football. In fact, the very first present that he received from his parents was a football. "Our dream is for you to leave a mark in football," said Abdon's father. So, day by day, Abdon sought to mold himself bit by bit, to fulfill his parent's dream. He trained himself, first of all, in the art of passing, as passing is the very foundation of possession in football. Next, he learned instinctively that to have possession, he must take it from the opponent. Therefore he also pushed himself in learning how to defend.
Seeing their son so devoted to football delighted the parents, and so they applied him into the Torino U18s, where he starts paving his way into professional football. Although one question remains:
Will he find his own love for football?
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Passing By
"The more possession you have, the better the chance of you winning," said Mrs. Claude, Abdon's mother, while they were watching a football match together. Young Abdon was only 5 at the time, but that saying has stayed with him ever since.
Abdon was born in a family that loves football. In fact, the very first present that he received from his parents was a football. "Our dream is for you to leave a mark in football," said Abdon's father. So, day by day, Abdon sought to mold himself bit by bit, to fulfill his parent's dream. He trained himself, first of all, in the art of passing, as passing is the very foundation of possession in football. Next, he learned instinctively that to have possession, he must take it from the opponent. Therefore he also pushed himself in learning how to defend.
Seeing their son so devoted to football delighted the parents, and so they applied him into the Torino U18s, where he starts paving his way into professional football. Although one question remains:
Will he find his own love for football?
| At a Glance With good stats in passing, technique, marking and tackling, he is a boy made for one thing: possession. Although he's good at decision-making, his lack of experience meant that he might not be able to apply his decisions on the pitch. Lack of any jumping power also meant he's a liability aerially. Will he be able to overcome these weaknesses? We'll see. |
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Omer Kaufmann
He's big. He's quick. He's aggressive. He's brave.
He got charisma oozes out of his ****. And he's coming for you motherf.. sorry.
Nicknamed "The Turk Tower" a.k.a. Three-T (not to be confused with Treaty), his father was a basketball player, and his mom was a nice and obedient woman, well.. until she died in a roller-coaster accident, poor little Omer watched that traumatic view right in front of his face. So he always tried to keep his eyes shut since age 8.
Although he was just 14, he got several criminal record, mostly drunk driving, before signed to Vaduz, he confessed that he never got drunk, blaming his poor balance to be a factor for him to fail to walk on a straight line during the test.
He's potentially going to be a David Luiz rip-off, or a Nyeck Nyobe (oh you didn't know about him? cool then), who knows?
Omer Kaufmann
He's big. He's quick. He's aggressive. He's brave.
He got charisma oozes out of his ****. And he's coming for you motherf.. sorry.
Nicknamed "The Turk Tower" a.k.a. Three-T (not to be confused with Treaty), his father was a basketball player, and his mom was a nice and obedient woman, well.. until she died in a roller-coaster accident, poor little Omer watched that traumatic view right in front of his face. So he always tried to keep his eyes shut since age 8.
Although he was just 14, he got several criminal record, mostly drunk driving, before signed to Vaduz, he confessed that he never got drunk, blaming his poor balance to be a factor for him to fail to walk on a straight line during the test.
He's potentially going to be a David Luiz rip-off, or a Nyeck Nyobe (oh you didn't know about him? cool then), who knows?
June 2015 Screenshots:
San Marino Players:
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Liechtenstein Players:
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Faroe Islands Players:
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San Marino Players:
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Liechtenstein Players:
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Faroe Islands Players:
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Telstar
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SIMAO SALAZAR
Simao was born in Torshavn. He has got nationality of both Portugal and Faroe Islands. His father is from Faroe Islands and mom from Portugal. He chose to represent Faroe, cause his papa told him he would f*** him up, if he'd represent Portugal.
Salazar was an arrogant boy since the time he was born. When he was born he didn't cry or nothing. He was just showing his parents the middle finger. In kindergarten he did what he wanted. He slept while others were playing and played when others were sleeping. At school he never did any homework. When a teacher asked something from him, he just replied "I'll f*** you up, b****". I guess that he got from his father. However, he never lived up to his words. Even when he tried to study, a mere few seconds later he was playing with his toy cars and dolls.
At the age of 13 he decided to take up football. He just walked to Helsingborg's HQ and told them he was going to play for them and they were going to pay him to do so. The men at Helsingborg didn't even get a say in it, cause Salazar's dad was one of the richest people in Northern Europe. That's the story of Simao Salazar.
SIMAO SALAZAR
Simao was born in Torshavn. He has got nationality of both Portugal and Faroe Islands. His father is from Faroe Islands and mom from Portugal. He chose to represent Faroe, cause his papa told him he would f*** him up, if he'd represent Portugal.
Salazar was an arrogant boy since the time he was born. When he was born he didn't cry or nothing. He was just showing his parents the middle finger. In kindergarten he did what he wanted. He slept while others were playing and played when others were sleeping. At school he never did any homework. When a teacher asked something from him, he just replied "I'll f*** you up, b****". I guess that he got from his father. However, he never lived up to his words. Even when he tried to study, a mere few seconds later he was playing with his toy cars and dolls.
At the age of 13 he decided to take up football. He just walked to Helsingborg's HQ and told them he was going to play for them and they were going to pay him to do so. The men at Helsingborg didn't even get a say in it, cause Salazar's dad was one of the richest people in Northern Europe. That's the story of Simao Salazar.
September 2015 Transfer News:
> Juventus, Roma, Napoli and Inter chase a number of Sammarinese wonderkids.September 2015 Transfer News:
> Lewie Roberts seals a deadline day £1.5m move from Empoli to Inter Milan, rejecting Lazio in the process.
> Juventus' £858k move for Calgari's Matthew Harrison falls through at the last minute due to deadline day.
> Daniele Del Conte rejects a £2.4m move to Serie A newbies Avellino.
> Fellow Sassuolo player Callum McCairns moves from the club to Juventus for £2.15m.
> Faroese goalkeeper Hans Christian Pedersen will join LOSC Lille in March 2016 for £325k
> Fellow Faroes Centre-Back David Jeronimo will move from Helsingborg to Red Bull Salzburg in January 2016
Bowieinspace26
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Woo move to Austria. David Jeronimo loves a bit of weiner schnitzel