The Alfa Romeo Metaphor

"Howdy," I said walking into the conference room at Kindsmeadow to meet with the U18 coaching staff. We all shook hands again. I'd been introduced to them on Friday. "I want to apologize for being unable to remember your names, but I'd just driven all night to get here last Friday. Would you all tell me about yourselves?"

View attachment 426960"I'm Mark Robinson, I'm the U18 manager," said the young man next to me. He couldn't be 25 years old. "I was a trainee at Charlton, I'm from Romford. That's in the northeast of London. I played for Havant and Waterlooville, Gloucester and Maidenhead. I ruptured my ACL in 2011. I couldn't keep playing so I got my B certifications. I'm working on my A right now."

"I can relate to the ACL thing," I said.

View attachment 426959"I'm Walsh, Dave," said the crusty looking character next to him. "I quit playing probably around when your were born. 1912 to be exact. I'm The Kid's assistant. I change his nappies, wipe the drool, etc. etc. Actually, I'd been out of football a while. I'd been been working for the Post for many years and volunteered to help out with the kids back in '03. I took my pension and now I'm actually a paid employee. I played for Braintree, Dartford, Lincoln, Wrexham and Burton if I haven't forgotten someone."

View attachment 426958"I'm Dave Turner, Young Dave, I'm the Head of Youth Development. I was an Arsenal schoolboy, but washed out. I played in school and at University while I got a degree in Early Childhood Education. I applied when this post opened up last July and got it. I play for a pub team now."

View attachment 426957"I'm Michael Hamilton. Nobody calls me that. Everyone calls me Hammy. I mean, I will respond to it after you say it three or four times. I'm a coach. I played for Exeter and Hartlepool then York then Barrow then Boston and then Histon. I moved down here with the wife when she got transferred. I hired on coming up on two years ago."

"Thanks, I look forward to working with you," I said. "As you know all the senior team staff left or just got let go. From everything I've heard you all are doing a great job with the youngsters so you're staying. Plus, I think continuity is good with them."

"I'm going to bring in younger players, possibly some teenagers if they're quality," I continued. "I want to rely on youth. It's a two-fold deal. First, if a bigger club comes in for some young star, we get a nice windfall. Secondly, if a teen has the skill set, he'll be cheaper than a thirty-something."

"I need to know if there are any kids I should promote to the first team?" I asked.

"There are two," Young Dave said. "Mark Tomlinson and Daniel Barlaser. Mark is a central midfielder. He's tenacious and he's big potential. He's only 16. Daniel is a winger. His first touch and dribbling as well as his passing and long range shooting are rather good."

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Oh, the drudgery

I scoured the League Manager Association's CVs and I had a list of:

  • 9 Assistant Manager candidates
  • 4 Goalkeeper Coach candidates
  • 8 Physios
  • 8 Fitness Trainers
  • 7 Defense coaches (two of which were also Assistant Manager candidates)
  • 8 Offense coaches (one of which was also an Assistant Manager candidate)
  • 9 Scout candidates
This was a bit of a tough juggling act. The FCB said I could only have an Asst Mgr, 3 coaches and a U21 Manager. One of my 3 coaches was going to have to be the Physio as they aren't allowing for me to hire for a Physio position.

Between these 4 I needed the following training taken care of:

  1. Fitness (Strength)
  2. Fitness (Aerobic)
  3. Tactics
  4. Ball Control
  5. Defending
  6. Attacking
  7. Shooting
  8. GK - Shot Stopping
  9. GK - Handling
Obviously, my fitness guru and GK coach would take care of items 1, 2, 8 and 9. This left two hires to help with the rest. Obviously, I would be doing plenty of hands on training. No watching training from my ivory tower and texting my minions with pointers to teach the players.

I called 50 candidates. 8 weren't interested in talking, Wimbledon were below them. That makes 42 phone interviews. I finished by Friday. Yes, that's right. 42 hours of talking on the phone. While it's vital and it's important, IT ****ING SUCKED!!!

I have 4 Assistant Manager/Coach candidates coming in next week, 2 fitness guys, 1 GK coach, 3 Physios and 3 scouts.

WILL THIS TORTURE NEVER END!?! Oh, wait, it's Friday and May turns to June this weekend. And I'm in London. Yes, it just did get better. And the forecast for the weekend is splendid.
 
In addition, I spent my evenings using the FA's friendly scheduling capabilities to arrange some money-making friendlies for the preseason. The secret is to arrange Cup competitions.

Wimbledon Kickoff Challenge
Birmingham, Blackburn and Bolton on Friday, July 11th and Saturday the 12th

Wimbledon Summer Cup
Arsenal, Liverpool and Totteham on Friday, July 18th and Saturday the 19th

Wimbledon Summer Challenge
Everton, Newcastle and Wigan on Saturday, July 26th and Sunday the 27th

Plus, I convinced Celtic to come down to kick our preseason off. Toss in AFC Dunstable, Braintree (away) and Luton (away) and that's a complete preseason.

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Saturday afternoon I wandered around Temple and the Inns of Court then walked upriver to Parliament. Next I wandered over to Trafalgar Square. I had some sushi then caught a movie. I was hungry after the movie so I looked for something interesting and settled on a Middle Eastern kabob joint.

It was 10:30pm and I wasn't exactly in the mood to go home. After a little searching on my iPhone I discovered that one of the top nightclubs in London, Borderline, wasn't that far away. So I dawdled at the restaurant read about the upcoming El Segundo playoffs. Cadiz were not favored to beat Racing Club Santander.

Around 11 I walked over. I figured I'd have a couple of drinks and listen to some of the latest music. Bologna and Cadiz are not exactly hubs for culture.

"Bourbons on the rocks," I yelled to the bartender.

After I got my drink I searched out and found a good place to people watch. I really hadn't heard any of the tunes the DJ was playing and some of it was good. I'd installed the app Shazam when I first got my iPhone but finally used it tonight.

It took me a half hour, but I'd nursed my bourbon until all the rocks had melted. So I sacrificed my vantage point to get another drink.

"Martini, dirty," I yelled at the bartender over the music.

I got my drink, turned and was face to face with a gorgeous tall, brunette.

"I know you," she yelled over the music. "You're that famous soccer manager."

"I'm famous?" I yelled back. Soccer? Nobody over here calls it that. I should better describe the young, very young woman before me. The hemline of the thing she was wearing that some might call a dress was immorally low.

"Yeah, all the boys in my family are Wimbledon fans," she yelled. "My brother says you're a ******."

"Does he." I replied working incredibly hard to maintain eye contact and not let my eyes wander downward. Blue eyes.

"Yeah, but he's got shiite for brains. The intellectual capability of a pebble. I'm Gwen."

"Enrico, nice to meet you." Then there's her earrings. They were huge and looked amazingly expensive.

"So you're both Italian and American then?" she yelled. I shrugged. "That's good in my book. Brit boys are so desperately, desperately boring and of course this horrid island is filled with them."

Was I getting hit on? I wouldn't be shocked if it turned out she was still a teenager. Eye contact was the key.

"But this is London, isn't that cosmopolitan enough?" I yelled.

"I'd rather be in Milan," she yelled back.

"Oh, they'd love you there," I yelled.

"And why would that be newly acquainted Italian friend?"

"You have got to be a model," I yelled back. She was playing coy. I'm not nearly as dumb as I look, though. "My ex-wife spent a lot of time and money there. I know enough about what she'd bring back that what you're wearing is really expensive, designer stuff."

"And why would they like me?" She didn't deny that she was a model.

"Tall, pale," I replied. "They don't get all that much of that there. You'd stand out even more there than you do here."

"But you're American, too," she added. "That makes you extra interesting."

"It does?"

"Of course. First, you're not British. Secondly, you're Italian and that's so sexy. Third, you're an American who's not a businessman and you go to clubs. And I'll forgive you for being a footballer since you're managing my brother and Dad's favorite club."

"Need a drink?" I yelled. She nodded. I didn't catch what she ordered but she got something neon blue with an umbrella in it. "What the **** is that?"

"Smurf ****."

I looked down at my martini. Took a sip.

"Name is Pucci, Enrico Pucci," she yelled at me pulling me toward the dance floor. "You dance, don't you?"

Badly.

"Meet my friends," she shouted in my ear. "Alicia and Darcy."

They both smiled cold, icy smiles. Boy, did I feel welcomed. Both were most likely also models and clad in skimpy black dresses.

"They're so charming, where did you find them?" I asked in her ear. "A department store window?"

She laughed.

She wasn't that much of a dancer, either, but has the advantage of being beautiful and scantily clad. Furthermore, the fact that she doesn't fall over wearing heels that high indicates she's quite athletic. Put that combination together and who gives a ****.

The witty dialog went on all night except for when we were dancing. Well, at least between Gwen and I. Her friends were shockingly dull and. I know. Surprising.

At around 2AM, I just couldn't take it any more. This was way past my bedtime. The three young women huddled in conference.

"Shall we get some air?" she yelled. I nodded. "You look knackered."

"Can I offer you a taxi ride home?" I asked once we were outside. She nodded. "Your friends off to the next club?" She nodded.

"Listen," she said quietly while we were heading southwesterly. "I know it's crossed your mind that why would a young woman such as me be as forward as I've been. Well, here it is. I have a mutually beneficial proposition. As a modal, I need to raise my profile. Be seen with people. And what new football manager doesn't need a modal on his arm occasionally. Plus, you're not a boring ***."

"I can agree to that."
 
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Welcome to June 2014! There's nothing like spending a Sunday morning watching game tape. I need to watch some matches from last season to get an idea of I want to keep any of the player's with expiring contracts. After watching three matches, I can confidently say none of them. I didn't see a couple of them play, but if they're not featuring, that's likely for a reason, right?

There's also a good number of player's with another year on their contract I'll want to sell, loan or release.

It might be more accurate to determine what players I actually want to keep. I'm going to need to add a whole bunch of players to fill out the squad.

By afternoon, I was feeling squirrely. I decided to go and see Hampton Court. I'm at a loss for words to describe it.

In other news, bad day at the office for Cadiz. They lost two-nil at home to Racing Club Santander.

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Sevilla Atletico scored two invaluable away goals and dramatically increase their chances of promotion. Albacete tied, but conceding 2 goals at home makes their next leg very tricky.
 
This first week in June will be a big week. The FA release the League Two schedule, the FTB (Football Trust Board) will approve the transfer budget which I am expecting will be 50,000 British Pounds Sterling and I should have a staff by the end of the week.

Here's my squad as of early June:

Goalkeeper: need one

Defense:
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I've got an experienced but slow pair of central defenders. Speed is nearly as important as you'd think. We'll just play a deep line so nobody can beat us over the top.

Frampton and Hazel aren't that tall, 5'11', but I plan on adding two more central defenders.

But here are my Captain and Vice Captain.View attachment 426656

But Jim Fenlon looks like he'll be awesome. Young, fast and good with either foot. He can play either fullback position. He doesn't read the game all that well, but he makes up for it with his speed. I can't teach speed, I can teach positioning, anticipation and work with him on his decision-making.

Furthermore, I can't teach determination and Hazell and Fenlon are very determined. I'll add two center backs and a few fullbacks and make sure the average level of determination at the back is high.

Midfield:
View attachment 426655View attachment 426654
My problem in the midfield is I don't have much to work with.

Harry Pell is a decent prospect. He's okay at the things I need in a central midfielder, but doesn't excel at anything.

George Francomb will do just fine as my right midfielder or winger, depending on what system we use.
View attachment 426653
View attachment 426652Forwards:

I don't see Jack Midson or Charlie Strutton as forwards who can lead Wimbledon to the next level.

However, they're both determined players and that can go a long way in a lower league.

I'll bring in two forwards.
 
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Assistant Manager

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Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Sean Hankin is going to be my Assistant Manager. He's just hung up his boots and gotten his B license. His primary responsibility will be the defense.

During our conversations, we got to talking about technique. Like me, he knows how to strike the ball correctly and how to teach it, it's just that neither of us are any good at it for whatever reason.

Like me he's a fan of the passing game and thinks that even a League Two side doesn't have to be an embarrassing and boring Route One machine. We talked extensively in our interview about how to get whatever team I assemble to pass the ball out of the back and maintain possession.

Hoofing it forward as a general principle is anethema to us, so we'll get along great.

Defensively, he prefers a mix of marking and zonal. From my experience last season with Cadiz and his experience playing in the lower divisions, we both realize that a strict, tight marking scheme just doesn't work all that well because of players' ability to read the game, communicate and pass assignments around.

For example, if you're a center back and the striker has drifted out wide you have a several responsibilities aside from the game in front of you. You need to both talk to the fullback on that side and keep an eye on that striker. The keeper can help with that, but that all depends upon the three of you talking about that striker. This is easier described than done.

We have some ideas about how to pull this off for a League Two side with the players we'll have available
 
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U21 Manager

View attachment 426601
Matt Woolley is going to be my U21 Manager. He's young, too; 32 and recently completed his B license. After reading the reports on all the U18 players who are graduating and the U21 players who are out of contract, I'm considering not even having a U21 squad. If we have any decent U21 players, they'll be in the senior side. Matt knows this and agrees with my assessment. He understands that hiring him in this position is just a sneaky way to get a coach for the senior side. He'll also help out with the U18s and he's excited about this. He said he really likes working with the "kids."

Matt will be responsible for coaching the offense. He prefers a high pressure, defend from the front system. Attack-wise he prefers to give the players the liberty to figure it out as they go and talk to them about strategies and tactics for breaking down defenses. He wants the players used to figuring it out on the fly. He wants to coach them to think for themselves.

We talked about the difficulties of playing a high pressure, defending from the front system when we have a center back pairing like Frampton and Hazell who are slow. He asked if I planned to sign a speedy fullback to complement Fenlon. I said I would do my best. I said if he wasn't the fastest, he'd be young and bursting with energy.

He thinks the forwards and midfield can pressure high up if the fullbacks are quick. Then can cheat inside then race outside if the ball is played out there.

He brought up that he thinks the best way to beat League Two defenses is by catching defenders ball watching. I agree. From the vids I've reviewed so far, exploiting ball watching should generate more than enough chances.

Furthermore, he's also a firm believer that League Two defenses simply cannot cope with runs from deep. In a more defensive 451, this means the two center midfielders are given liberty to get forward whenever they want. In a standard 442, the more attacking center mid is free to join the attack with deep runs.

He made me promise to sign at least a couple of fast players for the wings.
 
Goalkeeping Coach

View attachment 426600
Getting Paul Rachubka to sign on as Goalkeeping Coach is quite a coup if you ask me. The former Manchester United trainee just decided to hang up the gloves and boots. If I wasn't the first to call him, I'd be surprised. He only just announced his retirement and put his CV up.

He's also a fellow Yank. Well, at least a little bit. He was born in San Luis Obispo, California which is 250 or so miles north of Los Angeles just a few miles from the coast. His family moved to England when he was 7.

He is excited about the prospect of getting Wimbledon up a division or two. He's also seen up close and personal what the vaunted Manchester United Academy is like. That will be invaluable as Wimbledon attempt to grow ours.
 
Fitness Coach

View attachment 426598
Dave Wilson will be my Fitness Coach. Don't confuse Dave with the other Dave Wilson who played for Manchester United, Charlton and Bristol Rovers. Or the Dave Wilson who played in Sweden and now is a scout for Chelsea.

Wimbledon's Dave Wilson was born in Liverpool to a family of Everton fans. His heart was broken when Everton wouldn't consider him for their youth academy. Blackpool took him on, though. He never featured for Blackpool. He spent varying amounts of time with Barrow, Chorley, Halifax, Stalybridge, Eastleigh, Sutton United and finally Woking.

He earned a degree in Kinesiology after hanging up his boots. The gist of his degree is that he will tailor training to the player based upon his size, bone structure, running style, old injuries and recent injuries.
 
Physio

View attachment 426597
Jon Whitney will be the Physio. He is 43 and was born in Nantwich which is near Crewe in Cheshire. He played for Huddersfield (twice), Wigan, Lincoln (twice) and Hull. He was recently Walsall's Physio.

Between Whitney and Wilson, the Wimbledon players will be in pretty good shape.
 
When I wasn't interviewing my final candidates, getting their paperwork straightened away with Erik, I watched videos. I watched League One, League Two and all three Skrill divisions. My goal was to discover some players whose contracts were ending that I would want to sign or at least invite for a trial.

I was watching Bradford PA v. Stalybridge Celtic in the Skrill North. Celtic had this diminutive midfielder with solid passing, decent first touch and dribbling skills. He could use either foot and was clearly better than anyone else on the pitch. I checked and he was also out-of-contract in July.

I immediately called Lil Fulcillo.

"Boss, how can I help you?" Lil answered.

"Adam Pepper, played for Stalybridge last season, you got a file on him?"

"Sure do, I'll email it right now."

"I am watching him in the Skrill North and I have no idea why he's in that division," I enthused. "I might even pay Stalybridge money to get to talk to him before any else."

"A second, boss," Lil replied. "I'm pulling up the file. One moment ... okay ..." Lil told me all I'd already described about him but in addition that he had a pretty good instinct in front of goal.

"So you're assessment?"

"Buy him. Spend money now. He'll be worth it."

"Thanks. Talk to you later."

"Cheers, boss."

Click.

After a little more digging, I had all the contact information for Stalybridge. Then I checked at the FA for how much it would cost me if I just negotiated a contract with Pepper. 18K. Heck. That was worth it.

Here's why:

View attachment 426530
 
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Monday, June 9, 2014

"Welcome to our first coaches meeting," I said. "Everything going okay getting settled?" Everyone nodded. "No, seriously, if something isn't going well talk to me or Erik. We're here to do what we can to help you."

"Okay, as I mentioned when we talked individually," I continued. "We have a lot of work to do. We have to build a squad. I want a knew keeper and backup, We only have three defenders of sufficient calibre. In midfield, I have a right midfielder and a young prospect I'm not sure about. Finally, we need two strikers to lead the line. There are two with a year left on their contracts that are sufficient for back-ups."

"So we've got a transfer pot of 50,000 and I'm going to spend 18 on a midfield lynchpin," I said. "So we need to look for free transfers."

"Who's the midfielder?" Assistant Manager Sean Harkin asked.

"Adam Pepper," Lil Fulcillo replied. "I've been tracking him and the Gaffer saw him watching vids."

"I should have him signed this week," I added.View attachment 426511

"You said a keeper, yeah?" Paul Lowe said. "Yeovil's backup keeper looks interesting. Chris Dunn's his name. He's a big lad. I've seen him train and he's good. I think he's got to be getting desperate to be a starter. I'll get you his cell number and my file on him."

"What are you looking for in defenders?" Andy Walker asked.

"Fast fullbacks and the best central defenders we can get," I replied. "Pace isn't the most important thing in the middle. Good reading of the game, solid tackling, good in the air, the usual."

"Since you're going to ask anyways," I continued. "In the midfield we need a defensive midfielder and wingers. I want fast wingers. For forwards, I'd prefer to find a good target man and a fast player with good dribbling."

"You know we loaned out a young man named Michael Smith," Lil said. "He never impressed the previous Gaffer but I discovered him and I think we should offer him a new contract.

The staff all got talking, we all logged into the FA and we started compiling lists of free transfer possibilities.

"Alright then," I said once we'd been at it for two hours. "I think we have decent enough lists to get started. Let's divide it all up. Paul Rachubka, you watch some vids of Dunn. If you approve, you and I will go and talk to him. Sean and Andy, you two watch vids of the defenders. Matt and Lil, you watch vids of forwards. Paul Lowe, you and I will watch vids of midfielders."

"Dave and Jon, enjoy yourselves," I concluded. "Your hard work comes later."
 
Cadiz CF's season is done. They didn't concede a goal away at Santander, but could only score one.

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What must have been torture to the fans and coaches, as Kike Lopez scored early but the Yellow Submarine only managed ONE additional shot the entire game. But that makes sense as Jorge Luque got injured and had to be replaced in the 19th minute.

I can tell you one thing, I hope Adam Pepper has some of whatever it is that makes Luque awesome.

"Enrico," Paco Leal said answering his phone.

"Sorry to see you couldn't overcome the two goal deficit yesterday."

"Thanks. What an excruciating way to end it all. What a wild ride."

"You going back for another season?" I asked.

"Yeah," Paco replied. "The boss like us enough as his coaching staff and I don't think the club has the money to terminate our contracts. We had another incident of not getting paid after you were sacked. It's just chaos week after week."

"Yeah, I miss Cadiz. I miss you all, I miss Ana Maria."

"But it's your team, your system, Enrico," Paco replied. "Gay is smart enough that he didn't change your system much. He'll bring some new players and we'll see if he can do any better."

"You've got a month off now?"

"Yes. That will be nice."

"Going to do anything with the kids?"

"No, not really. Days at the coast, but nothing special. How's London? Wimbledon?"

"I have a staff now, an apartment and we need to build a team nearly from scratch."

"Just what you love to do," Paco replied.

"Yeah. Enjoy your vacation, Paco."

"I will, Ciao."

"Ciao."
 
I have a feeling you're going to bring Ana Maria back into this somehow...

(Or maybe I'm just overly-hopeful.)
 
World Cup Begins!!!

It's June 13th and it's the favorite time of year for me and 2 billion of my closest friends. Chairman Erik invited all of we staffers over for a party at his house to watch the opener with Brazil vs. Cote d'Ivore. Despite all the pomp and circumstance and expectation it was a drab match. Well, on the pitch anyway. We had fun.

Group A was most definitely the Group of Death this World Cup.

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At least the France-Mexico match was entertaining. Here's the Saturday results from the first round:

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On Monday London came to a standstill. Steven Gerrard was awesome!!! The end of the match got ugly as the Iranians became dirty and petulant as England gloated. USA were dreadful and were soundly thrashed by the Russians.
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Tuesday: Nobody expected the reigning champions to come out flat. But the other two matches were thrilling.
View attachment 426219Wednesday: Forza Italia! Colombia had a great qualifying but the Italians were focused and Mario was Mario. The Belgians look bad *** as do the Swiss.
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Thursday: The Kiwis played a 6-3-1, or at least that's what it looked like as I missed the pre-game. Germany cruised and Croatia-Paraguay was fabulous entertainment.
View attachment 426217That's round one, folks. I made bets with anyone who would that Italy would make the final and side bets about how many England would score. Everyone I know has written off the US of A. Sigh.
 
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Now you may think that I only spent my time watching the World Cup. Well, you would be wrong. Adam Pepper and Chris Dunn signed. Now I have my midfield maestro and my keeper. Dunn was especially excited to work with Paul Rachubka whom he knew from reputation. Both wanted to be part of my plans to get Wimbledon up two more divisions.

Check out some of the other new boys who will be moving to southwest London this July!

I said I wanted a fast, young striker with excellent dribbling skills. I got James Loveridge. He's also rather tall. Hopefully, Dave Wilson can put some muscle on those scrawny bones, but he'll do great in League Two. The debate amongst staff is will he top out at League One or The Championship.

He'd washed out of the Swansea system whom he'd joined as a teenager. He's Welsh and really excited to move to London.
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Simon Johnson featured for Eastbourne Boro since he was a teen, but wanted to move to a bigger club. We're that bigger club. I'm not sure he'll help us much when we reach League One, but he will certainly help this season.
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I'm finding it remarkably hard to find a left fullback who is willing to talk to me.

Also, we're in negotiations with Michael Smith, the so-to-be former Wimbledon player who was shipped out on loan. I'll keep you posted.
 
2nd Group Matches of the World Cup

Group A just got interesting. Mexico are pretty much guaranteed a spot in the second round. If Brazil beats France they are in the second round unless Ivory Coast beats Mexico by two or more goals. If France beats Brazil, they are in the second round. Ivory Coast are in the second round if the Brazil-France match is a tie and they beat Mexico. Goal differential is huge for them.
View attachment 426209Costa Rica stunned Ronaldo and Portugal. Holland got their **** together and beat Egypt, but barely. All the Dutch care about is getting to the second round. Or at least that's what all the pundits say.
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****** old England. Samuel Eto will now be booed throughout England for at least a year for punishing the horrid English defense. Of course, once the Indomitable Lions had the lead, it was as if there were snipers in the stands. Every time a English player came into contact with an opponent, it was as if they'd been shot. Iran kept the game interesting, but it was never really a competition. Messi being Messi and all that.
View attachment 426207USA's World Cup is done. Russia beats Tunisia to go top. Tunisia will be in the second round if beat the USA. Uruguay need the USA's help.

Spain and Slovakia put themselves in the driver's seat in Group E. Nigeria needs Spain's help to advance.
View attachment 426206
Belgium look awesome and defeated a solid and determined Chile. Japan were smooth, too. Both are through to the next round. The final matches in this group are meaningless.
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Why is it that Italy always always always have to keep everything hanging on the outcome of the final matches in the group stage? Mario was Mario and Italy looked to be through after his 65th minute goal. But then Italy fell asleep and let the Aussie left midfielder dribble all the way from the half line into the box and allow him to shoot? Where was the desperate/cynical foul just outside the box? At least make theme earn it. Sheesh.

If Australia or Colombia win in their head-to-head, the loser of the Italy-Switzerland match might go home.
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Germany are through. If Paraguay beat New Zealand by enough and a combination of a win and Germany beat Croatia by enough, Paraguay are through. However, odds are in Croatia's favor now. Paraguay and Croatia's hopes all hinge on the final group matches.
 
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