The story of a failed footballer

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It was the turn of Martin McNiff and Sean Higgins to sit this game out as both lads served a suspension. Youngster Kyle Barr came in to make his senior debut, in place of Higgins upfront, at the age of seventeen while Ross Perry returned at the back in place of McNiff. After Conor Bell's cross was headed away by the Forfar defence Matty Flynn let rip with a terrific dig from the edge of the box that boomed past the Loons goalkeeper. We went in to the break deservedly leading a distinctly average side who were supposedly the favourites to be champions. Not long into the second half and we got goal number two as Peaso netted his fourth of the season from Stephen Maher's long raking ball through the middle of the park. Our entire defence, goalkeeper and infact our team in general were incredible today. Really solid performance as we get the league campaign off to the best possible start with a 2-0 victory.
 
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We don't seem to have much of a break between games at the moment but despite that, the lads are still raring to go and to start every match. Subsequently, we only had to make one change to the line up as Craig Easton unfortunately picked up an injury and will be a big miss to the side, trialist Isaac Osbourne comes in for him. Ewan McNeil returned to the bench after injury too. The lads were told that I expected them to carry on where they finished off last time out. Montrose scored on 20 seconds. Thirteen minutes later, after being laid off by Osbourne, Stephen Maher evened things back up with a strike just outside the box. Maher then had to come off at half time through injury and was replaced by Sam Evans. Lady luck was on our side fifteen minutes into the second half as a defensive mix up by Andrew Steeves and Ryan Ferguson resulted in an own goal by the former. That wasn't an ideal performance but we recovered well from that really early lapse of concentration in the game to go on and win 2-1 to send us top of the league after two games.
 
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With Isaac Osbourne having played four games for us his trial comes to an end. Another two players joined on trial though; Jacob Esposito and Steven Ross. Ewan McNeil makes a return to the side at wing back as he replaces Phil Johnstone. Esposito and Sam Evans come into the midfield in place of Osbourne and the injured Stephen Maher while Ross takes the place of young Kyle Barr upfront. Mark McMillan's three game clean sheet run came to a halt when Jordyn Sheerin let fly from outside the box to give Berwick the lead. A lead that lasted the full game as the match finished 1-0 in Berwick's favour. We just weren't at the races as Berwick dominated today.
 
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We managed to get a player in on trial who would be considered a bit of a coup. Alan Forrest joins us from Ayr and I must admit I'm surprised they let him leave as he is an outstanding talent who had played all of their games thus far. Still, we're happy to have him and hope that he can give us a couple of magic performances that we'd come to expect from his older brother James. He comes into the side to replace Jacob Esposito and in a further two changes Craig Easton and Sean Higgins regain their places from Sam Evans and Steven Ross. We didn't get off to the best of starts and Scott Agnew put Stranraer ahead early on in our Irn Bru Challenge cup tie. We went into the second half with nothing to lose and I told the lads to just go all out and attack them. It backfired. We were 2-0 down ten minutes later. Luke Watt then rounded the match off with a third goal for Stranraer as we crashed out of another cup.
 
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We made quite a harsh decision ahead of this game with Stirling as we dropped seventeen year old 'keeper Mark McMillan despite him keeping four clean sheets in nine games. Simply put, I felt we needed a more experienced head in goals and James Severn has been on trial with us for a couple of weeks now. I am looking at giving Severn and Steven Ross a deal if they impress me in the next two games. Sean Higgins was the player to drop to the bench for Ross. With both Severn and Ross in our squad we had to drop Forrest as we can only use two trialists per game so Sam Evans came in for him. Ross justified the decision to include him when he headed in from Craig Easton's cross on the twenty-fourth minute. It took just five minutes for Stirling to equalise though. We gave away a penalty on the sixty-fifth minute of the match after Ross Perry appeared to fouled Blair Henderson. 2-1. We almost pegged them back immediately but we skelped the post twice. This was a really poor result and it showed up how poor the quality is at this level.
 
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I had apparently misread the rules about trialists playing and in actual fact it appears to be three games they are allowed to play in and not the four that I thought it was. As a result of this Steven Ross had to miss this game but will be signed permanently. James Severn's trial period has come to an end but he is mulling over our contract and may still sign. Mark McMillan returns between the sticks and Alan Forrest gets a chance upfront in place of Ross. Forrest wins a penalty in the eleventh minute! Craig Easton steps up.... AND SCORES. The lead last a mere two minutes before Craig Gunn gunned(sorry) us down to score an equaliser for Elgin. And Peaso nets a beauty of a free kick from the edge of the box!! Thomas Reilly wouldn't let us get carried away with ourselves either as he brought us crashing right back down to earth with another equaliser two minutes later, once again. Elgin took the lead for the first time in the match after the hour mark as Gunn fired a shot(can't help it) past McMillan for the second time in the match. Peter MacDonald didn't want to let Elgin have all the fun this time though as he pulled us back level to score his second in the match too, class from Peaso. A truly fantastic game of football that was and it was a fair result for both teams as neither one of us was going to lie down and be beaten.
 
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We lined up to face Annan exactly the same way as Elgin as we had a fully fit squad raring to bounce back with a win. Steven Ross is on the bench after joining permanently. The goalscoring got underway in the most bizarre of circumstances as Ewan McNeil's intended cross sailed over the full box, the goalkeeper and into the net! There's a recurring sense of déjà vu with this team there really is. Entering the final minutes of the match we go with the now famous 'waste time and knock it about' approach and we only go and score a second goal don't we! And who's that goalscorer you ask? Peter 'Peaso' MacDonald = Superstar. Luckily he did as Annan nodded in from a corner on the ninenty-first minute to make things awkward for us in the last minute. But that wasn't all this match had to offer. No, no. It should've been finished. The game should've been done. Well into the third minute of injury time, only two were added, David McKenna dived at a corner and the referee pointed to the spot. We were cruelly denied victory as the diver McKenna leveled things up to give his side an undeserved point which stretched our winless run to five games. Heartbreaking result and one that leaves a bitter taste in the mouth due to the circumstances.

 
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I'm really starting to question if I am cut out for this football management malarkey. I can't cope with the opposition fans shouting obscene things at me about my past. As if it isn't hard enough to deal with! I can't let the boo boys stop me from doing what I need to do to bounce back from adversity though. I have to succeed here. I just have to. It's going to be an exceptionally huge season for me as I'll have to deal with the criticism leveled at me whilst also remaining focused on getting Clyde promoted too. I can see what Barry Ferguson was saying back when he quit, this side don't look good enough to gain promotion and with the bank balance and wage budget already in the red it's not looking good for the club if we don't get promoted. With six games gone in the league we sit in fourth spot, one place below our media predicted finish for the season. Scott Ferguson makes a return to the team from a three month injury lay off. I really hope he can adapt to playing in midfield instead of on the wing as he is a real game changer. Ultimately, we don't play with wingers so he just has to change position if he want's to play. James Severn turned our contract down and I'm not too disappointed by that as young Mark McMillan has been decent enough for us. Alan Forrest becomes the latest trialist to leave the club after making his three appearances. With my first two months out of the way the honeymoon period is well and truly over. Let's do this!

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Chris Smith has been complaining about his lack of first team appearances this season so he was put in ahead of the under performing Lewis Clark for this game. Scott Ferguson was also given a start and he took the place of Sam Evans. Steven Ross was the final change to our side as he replaced Alan Forrest upfront. By the twentieth minute Nikolay Todorov had netted a double as we looked like a team completely devoid of motivation and ideas. Cowdenbeath battered us! Peter MacDonald pulled one back for us but despite dominating the final twenty minutes of the game we couldn't ****** an equaliser. The winless run goes on and we drop down to fifth in the league. The bad news kept coming as Peter MacDonald was ruled out by injury for five weeks with a twisted ankle.
 
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With Peter MacDonald ruled out for five weeks we brought in Paul Harvey on trial to cover for him for a couple of games and so he was the only change we made to the starting lineup to face Edinburgh City. A minute into the match; 1-0 to Edinburgh City. We immediately changed our counter attacking approach to an all out attacking one, we couldn't lose to the leagues new boys. Steven Ross pulled one back for us just before half time. Game on. Ross doubled his tally on the fifty-sixth minute to give us the lead. Steven Ross was fantastic for us today and as the match finished 2-1 it was his double that earned is the victory. We moved up to third place in the league to end our six game winless streak. Scott Ferguson had only been back for two games before getting another five week lay off after this match. The boy has no luck!
 
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With Scott Ferguson out injured Stephen Maher found a way back into the side in what was the only change to the winning team against Edinburgh City. After a great spell of domination we eventually took the lead as Paul Harvey netted his first goal for us. Ewan McNeil's cross was rammed into the Forfar net by the striker. It was hero to zero for McNeil seconds later as he picked up his second yellow card and earned himself a red card. Fifty minutes with ten men couldn't be too hard, could it? Well another goal cushion would help and that's exactly what we got when we were awarded a penalty and Dylan Easton stepped up to convert. 2-0. The match finished up 2-0 as our ten men done superbly well to hold out for the win. Two on the bounce now, let's keep this up!
 
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Phil Johnstone comes into the side to take the place of the suspended Ewan McNeil whilse Scott Ferguson and Peter MacDonald make the bench after their return from injury. In the twenty-third minute Paul Harvey netted his second goal for us on his trial period after some great wing play down the wing by Conor Bell resulted in a sweet ball whipped into the box. Just twenty minutes later though and the game was all square once again as Arbroath's Josh Skelly pulled them level. Stephen Maher is a champion at finding our strikers with a long ball over the top and he done so for us once again with Steven Ross the recipient this time. A slotted past a flailing Robbie Mutch in the Arbroath net to put us 2-1 up. Our leaky defence were nowhere to be seen at a corner though and Jassem Sukar made us pay with a composed equaliser. A 2-2 draw was all we could muster up from this game and by the end of it we were lucky to even hold on to that.
 
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We had started to put together some much improved performances in recent weeks but the amount of goals we're conceding and leads we're letting slip is ridiculous. We're already doing overtime on the training field to try to rectify our mistakes from games but my focus is on continuing to score for now. If that means we become a team willing to play the dangerous 'we'll score one more than you' tactic then so be it. We have had rotten luck with injuries this season as well, it seems like every game we have a played ruled out for a minimum of three weeks! Which is quite hard to deal with when you're squad is already stretched thin as it is. The bond we are building as a squad is great though, you can sense a real togetherness among the players and they have grown really close in my time here. I guess it helps that there aren't loads of players in the team and so they have become a real tight knit group. Any youngster we bring upto the match squad and into training or any trialist we bring in are all welcomed and made to feel at home by all of the lads. A truly great thing to see I must admit. We were drawn with our county neighbours and feeder club East Kilbride in the Scottish Cup. A truly winnable tie which would help us financially should we progress to the next round. With East Kilbride up next, all of our efforts will go towards ensuring we complete a thoroughly professional job against the Junior side. It's been a stressful couple of months as I was warned by John Alexander but I am starting to enjoy it that little bit more. I am really happy to be working towards my Continental C Licence too as I am continuing to learn as I go along. John Alexander was more than willing to pay for my course as well which was a great thing for him to do. I'm a bit gutted that Paul Harvey's trial has ended and we can't afford to sign him as he's the first trialist we'll have who I feel that we'll miss. I would like to sign him and if the opportunity to do so arises I will be right on it. I was very happy to be name third in the manager of the month category for October. I consider it a great honour to have been mentioned.

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With Paul Harvey's trial period now over Peter MacDonald made a return to the starting line up and he was joined on it by Ewan McNeil who makes his return from injury to replace Phil Johnstone. As East Kilbride raced into a two goal lead after twenty minutes I really feared the worst for my side. I shouldn't have. Peter MacDonald pulled one back on twenty eight minutes and then Steven Ross pulled the match level again. 2-2 going into half time, not ideal but fantastic given that we were two nil down very quickly. With fifteen minutes to go Ewan McNeil's hopeful cross bounced off a couple of EK players and into the net for an own goal by David Munro. We had the lead! It was a nerve shredding end to the game as we held out for the win, just. It could've been a disaster but instead it was a really spirited performance in a really good game. Progress in the cups is ideal for us if we want to earn some money. We have been drawn against Dalbeattie Star in what is a very favourable draw for us in the third round of the Scottish Cup.
 
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We made two changes in personnel for our game against Montrose as we switched back to our 4-1-3-1-1 formation. Martin McNiff and Peter MacDonald were the ones who dropped to the bench as Sam Evans and Scott Ferguson took their places. The move back in formation looked to have backfired when Montrose forward Scott Hynd put his team ahead just before half time. That changed things and the lads got an absolute rollicking during my team talk. I guess that made them get their act together sharpish as Steven Ross drew us level less than a minute into the second half. Yet, despite some good play the lads just couldn't get that all important second goal and we had to settle for the draw. I'm not happy with how our team are playing, they're spraying passes straight to the opposition time and again, we're not getting into good positions and to be honest I would say we are generally just playing really poor. That might be harsh given that we are on a five game unbeaten streak but I want more from them.
 
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In the lead up to our third match of the season against Berwick I had the lads doing some intense training. We were working on ball control and I have set almost all of the lads to work individually on their short passing too. In terms of formation we also worked on a new set up which is essentially an asymmetric 4-5-1 as we've decided to use wingers for the first time this season. This could be the game where Scott Ferguson and Scott Linton prove their worth as the best wingers at the club. The only change in personnel was the inclusion of Linton who takes the place of Sam Evans. With the first half a bit of a dead rubber I thought that maybe we had got it wrong after going into the interval still at 0-0. Steven Ross put my thought's to bed quickly into the second half though. A fifty-fifth minute goal from the striker put us in front finally. When that goal went in the confidence oozed through the team and we begun to play like a team of champions. We added a second and third goal to kill the game off and win our first game against Berwick at the third attempt this season. My cousin Conor Bell grabbed the first professional goal of his career when he let fly from the edge of the box after a great ball was whipped in to him from a Dylan Easton corner. A great goal by him and one for the family to be proud of. Easton was again the provider as he set up Ross' seventh goal in as many games. A comfortable, confident and assured performance here. That's more like it. For all you statistic lovers out there we completed 81% of our 565 attempted passes or 463/565 if you would rather. A much better passing display from the lads and I was pleased that I didn't see any hit and hope passes. We had 55% possession in the match too, another thing to be happy about. Oh and did I mention this was the team that was top of the league?
 
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After a fantastic performance against Berwick we would ideally have kept the same staring line up to face Annan however, an injury to Steven Ross forced us into one change as Peter MacDonald took his place. The first goal of the match had been coming for some time for Annan and they eventually got it in the twenty-third minute as Barry Cuddihy nicked in ahead of Mark McMillan in our goal and knocked the ball into the net. Goal number two almost came five minutes later but we were saved by the post on that occasion. Matt Flynn got mixed up and thought he was Ronaldinho for a split second as he back heeled the ball past the Annan defence and into the path of Peaso who scored his tenth goal of the season. We got a right kick in the teeth when Annan went back in front just shy of the half time whistle which changed my team talk big time. David McKenna followed his first half strike up with a neat free kick from the edge of the box to sink us even further. We crashed right back down to earth with that one.
 
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It has to be said, Scotty Ferguson has not impressed me in his five games so far this season and he deserved to be dropped for this game. Our trialist Jacob Esposito would get his chance in his abscence. Unfortunately, he couldn't provide a spark for us in this match either. Neither he nor any of the other twenty-seven players that made an appearance in this game could. A dead rubber of a game and a miserable set of supporters went home aggrieved with a boring game. For me, a point is a point and we hold on to third place in the league on twenty points.

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Any feedback or advice welcome. :) Let me know if you're reading and enjoying the story. (H)
 
Really enjoying this mate, like a story with a bit of background to it KIU
 
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