Wigan Athletic: Piers, Pies, and the Premier League

Should I plough on and try and get a new job or start a brand new story?

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likeabaws

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Thanks to all who voted on my City story for a new team, and here it is, with the Mighty WIGAN ATHLETIC! Enjoy!

BOUNCING BACK


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I pressed the bottle to my lips, begging for the Smirnoff to reach my tongue. I was in a pit of despair. That day. That horrible, horrible day, kept coming back to me. Flashes of the studs flying through the air. The sound of the bone snapping. The doctor's words "You will never play again" still ringing in my ears. Three years today, that ugly huge centre half Zat Knight ruined my life.

I turned on the TV. I switched to Sky Sports News. I still followed football, no matter how I bitter I was, I loved the game with all my heart and I was a Wigan fan through and through. I used to have a season ticket. Georgie Thompson's fine face came at me (aaah) through the screen.
"Roberto Martinez has left Wigan after a dressing room bust-up with Jean Beausejour and Victor Moses. He resigned just 30 minutes after the incident. Favourites for the job are Stuart Pearce, Sam Allardyce and Phil Brown. A surprise contender is Kenny Dalglish who is odds on at 5/2 to get the job."
Oh my effing god! Our messiah, our savior, has gone? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
"Memory, all alone in the moonlight!" my ringtone warbled. I answered.
"What?" I bawled down the **** £10 phone from ASDA.
"Hello, is that Gary Holliway? It' Dave Whelan here, I wonder if we can meet up for a bit later on?" he said. Dave had been the owner when I was in the academy and I had met him a couple of times.
"What, is this just a catch up or what, and I've said I don't want to be a scout!" I said.
"No, no, nowt like that, meet me at the Chestnut Tree Cafe on Wigan Pier at around 6. Be there!". He hung up.
Wonder what that's about???:S

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A NEW ERA BECKONS

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"Sit down, Gary." said Dave, the chairman of Wigan.
"Listen. I'll cut to the chase. You were robbed of a fantastic career. Who had the potential to become one of the Premiership's leading wingers, and your career was cut short. So I have made the decision to give you another chance."
"Sorry, Mr Whelan, the doc said I can never play again!" I mournfully replied.
"I'm not talking about playing. I'm talking about managing!"
I was stunned. Me, managing a football team? The nearest I'd been to management was some saves on FM!
"Dave, if this is a pisstake, I will f^ck you up!" I said, in my most badass voice.
"No, we are serious. 16 grand a week till 2013. The choice is yours." he said smoothly.
"I-I, err... I mean of course I'll take it!" I shouted.
"Great. See you monday morning, 9am sharp to discuss budgets etc."
I couldn't believe it. I had another chance. No more drink, drugs and dead end jobs, it was Piers, Pies, and the Premier League!


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Good to see you're back again, I enjoyed your previous story and will defo be following this one :)
 
Sam91 said:
Good to see you're back again, I enjoyed your previous story and will defo be following this one :)
Click to expand...
cheers mate, I think I'll be doing this as a story with hints and mentions of results, but then put an end of season review up to tell you how I've done.
 
​PROGRESS
Dave had given me expectations of staying up with a transfer budget of £5m. I immediately set to work, scanning the rumours online and the transfer lists. I immediately spotted Glenn Whelan of Stoke at a knock down price of £2.8m. I gave Tony Pulis a call and we agreed the transfer. I spoke to Glenn and we sealed the deal pretty quickly. I looked at the loan lists and saw Emmanuel Frimpong was available for a season long loan for no fee. I snapped him up soon as I knew that Aston Villa and Sunderland were interested. My best signing was persuading Hugo Rodallega to return to the DW after his disagreement with Martinez. I still have some targets on my radar but I knew we were making progress.​
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A TWIST IN THE TALE

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I was pleased with my start, and despite being beat on the first day of the season by City, we won in the Capital One Cup 2nd Round and confidence was high. I had brought in new signings for free Ivan Klasnic and Portugal's former No. 1 goalie Ricardo, whose experience could be invaluable in such a young team. That's when everything changed.

I turned on my new TV that I bought myself as a reward for getting the job. Sky Sports News was on. I looked at the breaking news bar at the bottom of the screen.
"Beausejour charged by Lancashire Police for cocaine possesion" it read. I almost fainted. What a stupid arsehole! I phoned his best mate in the squad Figueroa for the details.
"Well boss, he was out at a party, Watson's I think, and he brought some to get high with some of these girls, and when he was on his way he got stopped for speeding and it was just poking out of his pocket!" he told me.
"How long will he be in for?" I asked.
"His trial i in six weeks. They're holding him till then." he said gravely.
I hung up.
"****!" I screamed. One of my best wingers out for 6 weeks? He'll miss everything, what a prized ******!

Ok, guys, I think I'll show you my tactic inc. my first choice team (not including ****** Beausejour!).
​
Al Habsi
Stam Alcaraz Caldwell Figueroa
Frimpong
McCarthy Whelan
Rodallega Moses
Boselli/Klasnic





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^^I rotate Boselli and Klasnic reguarly, I don't have 12 player ;)
 
RE-BUILDING MY LIFE

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In football terms, everything was going pretty well. We had got our first win in the league over Stoke and were sitting comfortably in mid table with a game in hand on the other teams. However, my personal life was still in tatters. I was still dependent on alchohol, getting through at least a bottle of whisky every day and a beer with every meal. I was getting worried, and when my mum came to visit she could see it too.
"You don't look well, love. And what's all that?" she asked, pointing to the collection of empty bottles of Jack Daniels on the table.
"Oh, mum. I need the drink! I collapse without it, I can't think straight. I don't know what to do!" I wailed, and then started crying like a baby.
"It's ok love, it's ok. Look, they have AA meetings at the community centre across the road from ours. Why don't you go there, and after the meetings have finished you can come back t' ours for a cuppa, a nice hot meal and a nice chat with me about yourself and with your dad about the footie?" she said. Bingo. Mum always knew what was best for me, (except that time she told me use the cubicles in the school toilets. Never again).
"That's a great idea, mum. Thanks alot!" I beamed.

My first meeting came by quickly. I put on my bet suit and tie, and as I was a high-profile manager if this got out I'd probably get the sack so I wore a fake moustache, dark sunglasses and a rubber nose. I greeted the group.
"Hello, my name is... errmm... Moufassa (what the **** was I thinking?!) and I'm a wino, I mean, an alchoholic!" I corrected.
"Hi, Moufassa!" the group trilled back
"Who wants to share with the group?" asked the guy who ran the group, Sam. A middle-aged man with BO stood up.
"I had a night of passion with a zebra on Wednesday!" he said with a blank stare.
"****** ****." Sam whispered under his breath. "Anyone else?"
"I haven't had a drink in 6 days!" said a young woman.
I could tell this wasn't going to be an easy ride.


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Last edited:
hi guys, I'm going away 4 a couple of days so probably won't be updating till friday unless the place I'm going has wifi
 
The place has wifi and I have played up until January, and I deliver grave news. I still have my job, but we are 18th, 6 points from safety. Unless we can come up with a miraculous recovery I expect we are going down. However I will not resign and I will continue fighting, but I won't be writing any story updates until I've played the full season incase I go down or get sacked. REally pissseed off.
 
Hello readers, I would like to deliver some good news. I am still six points from safety, but my boys have managed to reach the Capital One Cup Final and will play either Wolves or Newcastle!!! Hopefully even if we get relegated I can keep my job and take Wigan straight back up next year!!
 
Just to let you know, Wigan doesn't have a pier.

*Also, Wiganers do not like pies anymore than the average joe from Birmingham or Yorkshire.
 
Andy4EFC said:
Just to let you know, Wigan doesn't have a pier.

*Also, Wiganers do not like pies anymore than the average joe from Birmingham or Yorkshire.
Click to expand...

What about the book entitled "the road to wigan pier"? And OK but I was just trying to think of things associated with Wigan for the title.
 
CAPITAL ONE CUP FINAL SPECIAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Line ups:

WIGAN WOLVES

De Vries
McGregor Foley Johnson Dawson Ward
Boyce Piscu Alcaraz Figueroa Kightly Edwards Henry Hunt
McCarthy Watson Whelan Maloney Fletcher Sigurdason
Rodallega Di Santo

Bookies view: Wigan 2/1 , Wolves 6/2

KICK OFF!!!

2 Minutes - Maloney goes through and scores but it is rightly disallowed as Maloney was well offside. 0-0

5 Minutes - Whelan brings down Sigurdason in the area. Wolves have a penalty. Hunt steps up and scores. 0-1

19 Minutes - Sigurdason goes one on one with McGregor but Piscu runs back and makes a goalsaving block. 0-1

23 Minutes - Hunt puts in a great cross and Fletcher has a free header. McGregor makes a flying save to keep it at 0-1.

HALF TIME 0-1

SUB - Frimpong on for Whelan

KICK OFF

SUB - Boselli on for Watson

65 Minutes - Steven Fletcher is put through by Ebanks-Blake but hits the side netting. 0-1

69 (lol) Minutes - Di Santa latches on to a Maloney cross and scores! 1-1

81 Minutes - Maloney crosses but McCarthy puts his free header over. 1-1

4 MINUTES OF STOPPAGE TIME

90 + 3 Minutes - Shaun Maloney shoots from 25 yards and SCORES!!!!!!!!!!!! 2-1 to WIGAN!

FULL TIME - Wigan 2-1 Wolves

WIGAN WIN THE CAPITAL ONE CUP!!!
MOTM: Shaun Maloney

Wolves manager Stale Solbaaken after the game: "It is devastating for the lads as we took the lead and they've worked so hard all year. I can only apologise to the fans and now we will ensure that we go back to the Premiership to make up for this."

Wigan manager Gary Holliway after the game: "It such a great day for the club! The fans that turn up to every game deserve this and this will spur the squad on to fight to the death to stay up, and this has given us belief that we can stay up!!!"​
 
Sorry readers, I've failed you. We have been relegated. I don't know if I'll keep my job. IF not, look forward to a tottenham or Belgium story, as the rules of the story section allow you three stories per edition of FM, so if I'm sacked, my last story will be with you shortly :( :)
 
End of season review
Final position: 18th (relegated)
Trophies: Capital One Cup (qualify for EL)
Goalkeeper of the season: Allan McGregor
Defender of the season: Emerson Boyce
Midfielder of the season: Shaun Maloney
Striker of the season: Hugo Rodallega (11 PL goals, 16 IAC)
Overall player of the season:Emmerson Boyce (7.08 rating)
My job status: Sacked
I was unable to stay up, so I guess it is default that they sack me. However I kid you not, I am favourite for the TOTTENHAM job if AVB leaves so I will stay with the save for abit and if I don't get the job I'll start a new story. Thank you to all my readers, and a big FU to the person who suggested I do Wigan (only joking ;) ) . I really want to do Belgium or my favoured club EVerton. Thanks for following guys. :)
 
I GOT THE TEAM GB JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO STAY FOLLOWING FOR THE OLYMPICS LADS (AND LADDETTES I'M NOT SEXIST BRO)
 
i got the team GB job too when i was sacked from Chelsea lol, read my story if you want "Chelsea: My big call up" and read how i got on ;)
 
TEAM GB 18 Man Squad
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Goalkeepers:
Ben Amos, Jason Steele (Butland was with the u19s)

Defenders:
Ryan Bertrand, Phil Jones, Chris Smalling, James Tomkins, Kyle Walker

Midfielders:
Ashley Young, The Ox, David Beckham (c), Jack Rodwell, Jack Wilshere, Tom Cleverley, Theo Walcott, Gareth Bale

Strikers: Wayne Rooney (scored 39 league goals this season :0), Daniel Welbeck, Daniel Sturridge.

Thoughts? No Becks criticism cos he's tank ;)

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