We can go deeper. If Suarez really is Hitler's grandchild, then there's been a national conspiracy to cover it up. Just like there's a national conspiracy to cover up the slaughter of the Uruguayan sea turtles. Suarez playing in England, a culture so unlike his own, you could say that he was a fish out of water. Out of water... Not sea turtles, land turtles. Land turtles that would seem strange and bizarre to us, mutated even. Mutated turtles. Football players are young too: it's one of the youngest professions. Young, mutated turtles. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Now the TMNT are named after famous Renaissance artists, from iItaly. Suarez committed his latest hate crime vs Italy. Italy, the birthplace of the pizza. Pizza, a dish invented in Naples. Naples, the former home of Napoli stars Cavani and Lavezzi. Cavani and Lavezzi, an Argentine and a Uruguayan working together in a dastardly partnership. Ah yes, it's all making sense now. Those two serve PSG, a French group with Qatari investment. Qatar, the corrupt home of the 2022 bid. 2022 the proposed date for the first amateur mission to Mars. Mars, mars, mars. It's all making sense now. Those people going up in 2022 will be the first of their kind to go up. The first animals to be sent into space were fruit flys. Fruit flys, insects that infest fruit. Fruit, like Oranges. Oranges, like those shown in The High Fructose Adventures of Annoying Orange. The High Fructose Adventures of Annoying Orange, a show voiced by Rob Paulson. Rob Paulson, a primary voice actor for a popular tv show. That popular TV show centred around a buck tooth rat character, and was clearly designed to endear a generation of children to this beast. Shown from 1993-96, it would have been on at the perfect time to indoctrinate the new generation of football fans. That show, Biker Mice From Mars.
Suarez confirmed Biker Mouse from Mars...