Alpha Romeo Metaphor IV

[Enrico Pucci]

Before the Summer Cup kicks off, its important to note the Overall Balance. The Summer Cup should generate around 1M euros.

We lost the first match on PKs in the 10th round.

I glanced up at the scoreboard just after we scored in the third match and couldn't help but chuckle:

Regardless of my tasteless sense of humor, the weekend was a brutal reminder that we need to step up our game. I think training this next week will be very earnest and focused. Also, it will be back home.

Here's the back balance after the tournament. Profit from the tournament is €903,824!

 

[Hampus Silverholt]

disappointed in myself for laughing at FCK ARS...

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Sunday, 30 July 2023

8pm

The DFB Pokal draw occurred. We drew SC Paderborn 07. When we got promoted to the Bundesliga by winning they league, they got relegated from the 2.Liga.

They play a narrow 442 Diamond. We should be able to exploit the flanks.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Tuesday, 1 August 2023

noon

"Hi, Sören," I said as I walked into Sören Oliver Voigt's office. He's the Managing Director.

"Good morning, erm, good afternoon," he replied. "Ja, it is officially afternoon now."

"So how are the finances?" I asked.

"Funny you should ask," he said. He displayed his screen on the big monitor on the wall.

"Promotion back to the Bundesliga by winning the league sure helped our finances," he said. "You're little tournaments or mini-leauges are really helping the bottom line. If you look at the green graph, the expenditures graph, you can see the effect of staying within the payroll budget. Last season we only lost a four to seven hundred thousand per month which is good. Essentially, we needed to lose as little as possible. Now that we're in the Bundesliga, our game day revenue should be larger and the television money should be significantly larger. Even though you're over budget in payroll, it shouldn't really matter."

"Cool," I murmured.

"Question?" he said.

"Yeah," I sighed. "When does this positive financial situation get reflected in an increase in the transfer budget, payroll budget and scouting budget?"

"Ja, that's the hard part," Sören said. "Check out this." He displayed the following three reports. He gave me a minute to look at each one.

"The board are paranoid," he continued. "Things have been bad, really bad for so long that they're ... they're just scared. In the two years before you got here, we were on the financial brink. The stadium was an anchor around our neck, dragging us down, drowning us. Selling it to the city saved the club. But then we flirted with relegation into the Regional leagues. Ja, we've been promoted twice, winning the league each season under your leadership, but the experts all say we're going straight back down. We've got the smallest payroll in the Bundesliga. Bayern have spent 127 million so far this summer, we paid 350,000 for Mejias. Manuel Neuer's weekly pay is almost as large as our entire budget. He's not even the top earner at FC Hollywood. Our sponsorship income is 4.3 million. The top ten clubs, Bayern excluded, have sponsorship income of 30-80 million. We're not even in the top ten for sponsorship in 2.Liga."

"So we're punching above our weight," I said.

"Oh, its beyond that," he said. "If we stay up, we're the mouse that beat up tigers, lions and ... um ... uh ... pumas? Ja, pumas are a large cat."

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Wednesday, 2 August 2023

4pm-ish

"Do I know you from somewhere?" Gwen said as I walked into the kitchen. "You look familiar, but I just can't quite place ..."

"Ha, funny," I interjected. "Really funny."

"Wait, I do know you," she said. I walked up and gave her a kiss. "I'm sure of it."

"Mommy," Allison said as she tottered into the kitchen. "Who is that strange man kissing you?"

"Now its a conspiracy," I said. "You're bringing the children into your cruel jokes."

"Daddy waddy chicken patty," Allison said walking up to me. I picked her up and gave her a kiss, too.

"Yeah, its been a long two months," I said. "I think things should calm down now."

"Do you promise?" she said rubbing noses with me.

"I want to," I said. "I'm pretty sure I won't be busy like the last two months. Daddy's job is complicated."

"You're a complicated Daddy," she said.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

This weekend was the August Cup. I kept the players in Die Kabine for a while after the Roma thrashing (0-2 was really quite flattering consider how badly we played) and yelled at them for a while. The reserves did better against Inter but lost on PKs in the 7th round. The First XI rebounded on Sunday and thrashed Milan. Milan scored two late goals against exhausted reserve players. And, yes, you read that correctly ... 16 year old Nico Köse poked in a rebound in the 70th minute against Milan.

This was also a huge financial boost. We made €1,791,183 profit. That's a total of €3,720,291 for the three preseason mini-leagues!

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Friday, 11 August 2023

11:13am

Attacking players were working on a five on five drill with Ulf Kirsten and I. The drill was designed to get the players to create overloads and exploit them. When a team lost the ball, the player closest to goal dropped out, shouted they were dropping, and the new attacking team were supposed to take exploit the man advantage.

Or that was the idea.

Marlon Ritter tried a move on Jacopo Murano that didn't work. Jacopo burst past him and Ritter tried a recovery tackle.

We all heard the crunching kind of sound of a shinbone makes on something hard. Marlon curled up clutching his shinbone.

"Oooh!" my midfield wizard exclaimed. "Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!"

"S***!" I exclaimed.

"Great tackle, Marlon," Ulf said. "Can you walk it off?"

"Sorry, you alright?" Jacopo said extending a hand to help Marlon up. Marlon got up and hopped around a bit.

"No," he said. "Hurts bad. I don't think its major, but it sure f***ing hurts."

I texted Agnieszka to come down in the cart and get Marlon.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

We return to business with the first round of the DFB Pokal.

Marlon Ritter is out with a bruised shin so Oliver Batista-Meier replaces him. Oliver Hüsing had a poor week in training so I replaced him with Josua Mejias. Harry Chapman starts as the winger as Billy Arce still isn't fit.

Paderborn's little stadium is packed shoulder to shoulder. 1,500 Die Roten Teufel were crammed into a corner on the end we'd be attacking first.

Its a beautiful summer afternoon in Germany. Sun shining down, barely any breeze.

We start off as beautifully as the day, string passes together and immediately pinning Paderborn back to their penalty box.

The breakthrough comes in the 16th minute. The new boys combine: Oliver delivers a near post corner and Mejias rises high and smashes home the opener.

0-1

We continued to press and in the 36th minute, Jean Zimmer played a pass into the right corner for Chapman to chase.

My newest signing whipped in a cross. Shakur Omar met it at the near post, glancing it goalward.

0-2

No chance for the keeper on that one.

We utterly dominated the first half. We had two goals and they had zero shots on target.

The players decided to sit back and conserve their energy in the second half. Paderborn got three shots on target, but nothing too tough for keeper Avdo Spahic.

I gave new signings Ken Aboh and Matej Mach their debuts as well late on. Teenager Ilhan Yavuz also got some minutes.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Monday, 14 August 2023

9am

"The fire department, federal police, and paramedics are on their way," I said as I sat down.

"Anyone else we need to call?" Ulf Kirsten asked.

"Um ... NATO?" I said. "I don't have any connections into the US military. We may need some kind of military presence or something."

Several of the newer coaches were looking around in confusion.

"No f***ing espresso," Jörg growled. It was a disapproving growl.

"The machine is broken," Thomas Hengen added.

"I'm trying to fix it," Gelme, one of the cooks interjected.

"You can't just drink a cup of coffee, Enrico?" new goalkeeping coach Jan-Paul Conradi asked.

I put my head in my hands and feigned weeping.

"F***," Jörg exhaled then snickered and looked at his watch. "Players are coming soon."

"Take it away, Olaf," Thomas said.

"Sure," Chief Scout Olaf Marschall said. "Hertha Berlin are probably a good club for us to play in our opening match. They play a four-three-three with a defensive midfielder and wingers. Their wingers are fast and Zimmer and Silva will have to be ready for that. We pack the midfield so they'll have a hard time breaking us down. Their defense was middle of the pack last season and nothing has changed. We'll be able to create some opportunities against them. It all depends upon how clinical we are in front of goal."

"Thanks, Olaf," I said. "Agnieszka?"

"Ja, Muhammed Kiprit and Marlon Ritter should be healthy by Saturday," the club's Head Physio said. "Billy Arce will likely make the bench. I'll know more in a few minutes when I see who comes to see me."

"I've got something," Alexander Bugera the U19 Head Coach said. "The two boys are starting to ... well ... have become a problem."

I nodded my head. Gökcan Altindag (right) and Kristjan Džanko (left) were roommates. They had returned to preseason with bad attitudes. We coaches had all seen this before. They were trainees at a top club and had probably spent the summer break strutting it up and trying to impress the girls with it. Maybe with some success. Their modicum of success had gone to their heads. Their problem was they weren't all that good and probably were going to play 3.Liga at best. But not if they didn't learn the game.

Kristjan roomed with Gökcan's family here in Kaiserslautern as Kristjan was from Würzberg which was between Frankfurt and Nürnberg and a couple of hours away. They had gotten busted breaking curfew several times. Players and coaches had reported seeing them out and about when they should've been at Gökcan's. When confronted, they'd denied it. On several occasions coaches thought they'd noticed the smell of alcohol on them during training. It takes a pretty substantial amount of beer n booze to be sweating it out the next morning. Jörg had explained how this worked to the few who didn't know.

I had talked with each boy separately about their poor training twice already. Let's face it, when you're not that good AND you have a hangover, chances are your coaches aren't going to be impressed with your training. I emphasized their need to work hard and learn the game. Neither had improved and last week both boys had been underwhelmed with my motivational talk. Almost full on aggressively bored. I could tell they were on the verge of going full blown toxic teenager on me.

"Two boy matching their description got in a fight Saturday ... well ... I mean Sunday at around 1am," Alexander continued. "They were wearing f***ing FCK tracksuits, the m0r0ns. Nothing much, you know how it goes. One pensioner's garden was damaged, woke up the entire neighborhood. When the police showed up, everyone was gone. The usual teenage bulls****. That pensioner is a season ticket holder, just so you know. Her and her husband. That's how we know about it. She sent a reasonably clear picture of them from her surveillance camera "

"What do you want to do," I said.

"I've spoken to them both," Alexander said. "They know they are in trouble. I've explained that they need to work harder in training and improve their attitudes. Their attitudes are going to be rubbing off soon. That is what I'm worried about."

"Sounds like we're in last chance saloon territory," I said. Everyone looked confused. "Sorry, I tried to translate an American cliche into German there. My bad. So this is their last chance then, Alexander?"

"Ja," he said.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Tuesday, 15 August 2023

12:30ish pm

Jörg rang the doorbell. Ulf was examining the flowerbed that had been trampled. I just stood there awkwardly.

A woman opened the door. Short, curly gray hair. Pink polo shirt and jeans. No shoes. Utterly adorable.

"Anna, we're here about the flowerbed," Jörg said.

Anna looked confused for a second then gobsmacked when she realized who was standing in her front garden.

"Oh, no!" she exclaimed. "Gerhard isn't home. He'd so like to meet you three. Really? You're ... really? ... oh, its nothing ..."

"No, my dear," Jörg said towering over her. "We don't know much about gardening but if you can tell us what to do, we'll take care of it."

"I ... um ... well ...," she stuttered. She was turning a shade close to her shirt color as she was trying to pull her phone out of her back pocket. "I have to call Gerhard, can you wait a moment?"

"Of course," Jörg said.

Ten minutes later, Gerhard was home, we were all sipping tea, and examining the damage.

"So its really just that bit of fence and those two plants," she concluded.

"What are they called again?" I said.

"Rhododendron," she said. Then she spelled it for me and I typed it into my phone.

"Let me see this fence," Jörg said. It was a aluminium fence that was slightly bent by the person who pitched over it and into the two Rhododendrons. "Will you to hold the posts?" Ulf and I grabbed a post. He pushed and it groaned but it bent back to straight.

Gerhard bent over to get his eye level.

"Ja, looks good," he said.

"We're terribly sorry about all this," I said as I popped the trunk of my Audi S7. "We're going to head over to the garden center and get you new plants." I reached into the trunk and grabbed a bag full of assorted 1.FCK shirts and jackets. "Here are two shirts and two jackets. You look like a 42, right Gerhard?" He nodded. "And you look like a women's 32, Anna?"

"A 34 would be fine, dear," she said.

All three of us signed the shirts.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Friday, 18 August 2023

11ish am

"I've pulled you aside, yet again, because neither of you are working hard and you both have terrible, attitudes," I said to Kristjan Džanko and Gökcan Altundag as the players were leaving. "Do you have anything to say for yourselves?"

"Why do you keep singling us out?" Kristjan said.

"Ja," agreed Gökcan. "The U19s are winning and Coach Bugera keeps playing us."

"First, I keep talking to you because neither of you are taking what any of us here are telling you seriously," I said. "If anything your work ethics have gotten worse over the last few weeks. Secondly, the U19s are not about winning. Its about learning the game. Unless you get lucky like I did or have God-given world class talent like Coach Kirsten, you've got to work hard. Even then Ulf and I worked our ... butts off."

"I don't know what you mean," Kristjan said, a challenging tone in his voice. "We're working as ... hard ...

I'm not sure if the look on my face screamed 'bulls***, kid' but he kind of faltered.

"And then there's the matter of your partying," I said. They both looked incensed. I held up a hand to keep them quiet. "You've been sweating booze at practice. Jörg and I know how much beer and liquor you have to drink to be sweating it out the next day. We know from personal experience. We've all smelled it. You've been seen out partying. The fight you got into middle of the night Sunday did damage to a season ticket holder's garden. No, don't protest. She has a surveillance camera. You two were wearing club jackets. It sure looked like you. She and her husband are lovely people. Yes, I know that because, Jörg, Ulf and I went out and repaired their garden and fence."

"That wasn't ...," Kristjan protested.

I held up a finger.

"It wasn't us!" Gökcan exclaimed. "And we haven't been out partying."

"This is completely uncalled for," Kristjan said. "You've been on us for weeks now. Its not fair."

"Ja, why are you singling us out?" Gökcan said. "Its just wrong."

"JÖRG," I yelled across the training pitch.

He jogged over.

"Show them the video footage," I said.

He obliged.

"Tell me that is not you," I said.

They were silent.

"Clear out your lockers," I said. "You are done at this club. I am releasing you. The club will send the release payment to your parents."

They walked off, shell-shocked.

"F***," Jörg murmured as they disappeared from view. "I hope its a f***ing wake up call."

"God I f***ing hate this f***ing part," I said.

 

[Sam91]

Enrico went full MJ and said ''F those kids''

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Enrico went full MJ and said ''F those kids''

Don't f*** with the Don Pucci!

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Friday, 18 August 2023

1pm

"Let's get started," Technical Director Thomas Hengen said to the usual four reporters. "Niklas?"

"Do you think you can get off to a winning start?" Niklas Boll from Kicker asked.

"Ja," I replied. "We've been working hard and, if the players can carry the focus and determination into the match, we should do well."

"How important will Avdo Spahic be for your club this season?" Jakob Böttcher from Kaiserslautern Express asked.

"Ja, he's a great keeper," I said. "He's been a team leader since I've been here. He's a great shot stopper and organizes the defense really well. Ja, he'll be really important for us this season."

"What about Billy Arce?" Jakob asked. "He's picked up an injury. But he had a difficult summer. Would you talk about him and his situation?"

"Ja, sure, Jakob," I said. "He's really fired up to play. Maybe that's the problem, I don't know. Minor injuries happen in preseason. I think he's so eager to play after what happened this summer that he might have overdone it." I shrugged. "You've read the reports coming out of Ecuador. It doesn't sound like he's done anything and the club has been supporting him as best we can. His attorney back in Ecuador is seeking answers about why the police even questioned him. The evidence clearly exonerates him. He has alibis and the video evidence from the bar show he wasn't there on the night of the incident. Billy's good to go as soon as he recovers from this little knock."

"What about Madyan Sounni?" Niklas asked.

"Ja, minor knock," I said. "He'll be available soon."

"What are you thoughts on starting the season against Hertha Berlin?" Florian Carre of OneFootball.

"The boys were buzzing when we knew we'd kick off in Berlin," I said. "Its the Capitol. Hertha are a big club. The competition for places has been healthy. Berlin a great city and Hertha a great club to start our first match back in the Bundesliga."

"How important is it that Julian Niehues is so ultra consistent?" Dennis Friedel of Sportbuzzer asked.

"When I took the job, we didn't really have a senior player who met my standards for a defensive midfielder," I said. "Since I didn't have any money, I looked in the U19s. I figured I'd give this skinny, tall kid a shot while I searched for a loan signing or a free signing. Obviously, he's been on every team sheet since then. He's proven himself and I trust him completely at this point."

"Is Amilcar Silva going to burst upon the Bundesliga? Dennis asked. "Is this his breakout season? Or are you worried that he's inexperienced and will struggle in the Bundesliga?"

"He'll do great," I said. "Like everyone at this club we are desperate and determined to prove ourselves at the highest level. If you think about it, there are very few people still here at the club who were here in 2012 when we kicked our last ball at this level. My players have won two league titles in a row and now are prepared to claw, scrape and fight over every centimeter of the field. Amilcar is no different."

"Its time for the big question, Enrico," Dennis said. "Do you really think your squad has what it takes to compete at this level?"

"Ja, I do," I said. "I have been preaching to these players that they need to run through walls to get this club back where it belongs. They have stepped into the breach to protect our leads. We have overachieved and won the leagues in twice in a row. We deserve our reward of competing at this level. We have a core who have been the spine of this team as we've climbed the leagues. We all understand that many players at Bayern individually earn more than our entire club's payroll. We love that. Its a chip on our shoulder. We use that to motivate us. If anyone thinks we'll be pushovers, we are prepared to push back. We are a hard-edged, battle-proven squad. This season is an epic opportunity and this squad is determined to prove themselves."

"So you have a set starting eleven?" Jakob asked. "No surprises this preseason?"

"Ja, I know my starting eleven," I said. "I also have some new signings who have real class. Additionally, I have a group of teenagers who are very eager to get some minutes. They show me every training session."

"The supporters demand you play a more direct attacking game," Niklas said. "What is your response to your unhappy supporters?"

"What?" I said laughing. "Seriously, Niklas? Did you miss the last two seasons? We've won the title two years in a row. We've run away with each league two years in a row. What unhappy supporters?" Niklas just stared back at me like the thoughtless moron he is. "The Fritz-Walter will be packed and rocking next Saturday when we have our first home Bundelsliga match in eleven years. Is someone going to be protesting, Niklas? Seriously?"

"That's all the time we have," interjected Thomas Hengen as I was opening my mouth to really rip into the moron from Kicker.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Wow! 30k views. Thanks everybody for reading.

 

[Sam91]

View attachment 583887

Wow! 30k views. Thanks everybody for reading.

Honestly mate, so deserved. Your commitment to this story is incredible, especially the effort that you put into the writing style. Love it mate and long may it continue

 

[Enrico Pucci]

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Olympic Stadium is a huge, loud stadium. We could feel the crowd above us when we were in our team room. Personally, I love this. It reminded me of my playing days and that we were back where we ought to be.

Muhammed Kiprit left training a bit sore but it got worse yesterday afternoon. Ken Aboh makes his debut. Josua Mejias kept his place over Oliver Hüsing. Billy Arce stlil isn't fit so Harry Chapman stays in the side.

"You hear that?" I said. "You hear the singing? Do you feel the whole stadium vibrating? That's the sound of the Bundesliga. We're not going to be visiting any 5k stadiums anytime soon. I love that sound. It reaffirms that we're back. Nobody expects anything from us. The experts say we're going straight back down. F*** them. F*** everyone who doesn't think we deserve to be back in the Bundesliga."

"Hertha thinks we're going to be an easy win," I continued. "F*** them. We know we're solid defensively. Stay alert and work hard for each other. When we get the ball, get it wide. Get it to Rene and Marlon. I think Jörg has something to say."

"Go out there and f*** some s*** up!" he yelled.

The entire squad roared their approval.

We made the first half difficult for ourselves. Hertha tried to slide passes behind our defense and either we handled it or Avdo Spahic made the save. When we brought the ball out, we tended to lose the ball as we crossed the half line. Rinse and repeat but not in a good way.

Each time a player made a poor pass, I got their attention and pointed at my temple. This is our signal to focus and think.

They had the same problem. We'd intercept a pass when they'd try to cross the half line and create a chance.

Neither team found the magic touch and we went into the team room at half time scoreless.

We tightened up defensively in the second half and turned the match into a dull snorefest. Which is fine with me away from home.

Marlon Ritter wasn't having a great game, so I gave Oliver Batista-Meier his debut in the 65th. Amilcar Silva ran himself into the ground, so I gave Matêj Mach his debut as well. Aboh was really struggling so I replaced him in the 80th with Jacopo Murano.

In the 84th, Oliver curled a free kick for the top left corner from 35m. The entire stadium gasped as the Hertha keeper got a fingertip to it and deflected it onto the post.

Oliver sent Murano in on goal in the 91st minute. I knew he wouldn't score. He can't and he didn't. Any other of our forwards probably would have. Sigh.

And that was really it. A bore draw to start Kaiserslautern's first Bundesliga campaign in 11 years.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Werner: Welcome to the first Rötliche und Teuflisch podcast of the Bundesliga era, I'm your host Werner. As we mentioned on Friday for our pre-match extravaganza, this podcast started in 2013 and has never been able to talk about Kaiserslautern in the Bundesliga. And God as my witness it feels good. Joining me as always is Jakob. Say hello Jakob.

Jakob: Hello Jakob.

Werner: Was it good to travel to Berlin and not play a tiny club like Viktoria Berlin or what?

Jakob: Ja, it certainly was. Olympicstadion is a proper stadium. Granted it was two-thirds full. But two-thirds is still 50,000 people.

W: And we left with a point.

J: Ja, but I think we really missed Muhammed Kiprit yesterday. That chance that new signing Oliver Batista-Meier provided was exactly the kind of chance that he'd smash home. Our finishing wasn't the best.

W: Murano, Murano, Murano. I had such high hopes for that man. [sighs] ... What did you think of the defense?

J: I think we coped well enough. Thankfully, Hertha weren't in mid-season form. Then again the name Hertha Berlin doesn't strike fear into the heart like Bayern München so maybe mid-season form is rather meaningless with them. What did you think?

W: I think that Avdo Spahic deserved his Man-of-the-Match award. He stepped into the breach when the defense was pierced. But I will say our defense wasn't bad or anything. You know the other keeper was also quite brilliant.

J: That's true. We had more shots on target and he handled them all well. The xG said that Hertha had a better match offensively.

W: Also why Spahic deserved the award. Anything else to say about the match?

J: No, not really. Not that exciting, honestly. The manager had some interesting responses in his post match availability.

W: Oh? I didn't catch the post match interviews.

J: Ja, Pucci stubbornly claims the squad is going to do well. He said the squad have defied expectations two years in a row and were prepared to do it again. He used some military terms like battle-hardened. I mean the core of the team has been together for two years and showed yesterday that they work well as a unit.

W: Do you really have doubts?

J: At Bologna, they gave him the money to rebuild or maybe a better way to say it is reinforce his squad. He hasn't really spent any money. We've signed Shakur Omar and Ken Aboh on loan as forwards, picked up Oliver Batiste-Meier for free and paid a small amount for Josua Mejias.

W: You sound worried.

J: Look, I know we're going to get destroyed by Bayern and Dortmund. That's a given. But what about Leipzig, Hoffenheim, Gladbach, and Wolfsburg. Can our defense hold against them? We don't have anyone with Bundesliga experience.

W: Wait, doesn't our captain? Jean Zimmer has two years with Düsseldorg, ja?"

J: Oh, sorry. You're right. He does. And Molla Wague has two seasons in the Ligue 1 in France. Nonetheless, that isn't much experience.

W: So its really up to Pucci and his coaching staff?

J: Ja, I guess.

W: Why all the doubts all of a sudden? Hasn't Pucci said that he's built a hungry squad who are desperate to prove themselves?

J: Ja, all true. But isn't a hungry farmer a bad farmer if you follow my meaning?

W: Jakob! Pull yourself together, man!

J: Look, I hope we do well. But absolutely none of my colleagues think we're staying up.

W: F*** them.

J: Good point. F*** them. Let's move on.

W: The transfer window slams shut in a few weeks, do you expect any players leaving? Any more loan signings?

J: I've been asking questions and I think all the money is spent. I think Pucci spent it on Mejias and a dozen youth signings. My guess is that this all totalled around 700k or so. So he hasn't exactly spent like a sailor on shore leave or anything. I think it really all depends upon if someone buys Muhammed.

W: Ja, Pucci and Kiprit did have that falling out over Muhammed's new contract and he's been in the shop window ever since. So ... we sell Muhammed, we buy another striker?

J: That's the way it looks.

W: I think its time for questions. I have one or do you want to go first.

J: No, you go first.

W: Okay, your Mom was nice enough to write in again. She, tttttomas1fck on Twitter asks if its safe for Billy Arce to return to Ecuador ever again.

J: Good question. From what I've been able to gather, he is likely to play for the Ecuador national team again if he gets called up. Home games are played in Quito, the capitol, and I understand that he is probably safe there. Apparently, he has a lawyer pursuing or looking into why he was arrested in the first place. It appears to be a feud between his family and a rival family. That rival family has a captain in the city police force. It all seems rather shady.

W: Ja, because he wasn't at the bar and didn't do it.

J: Ja.

W: Do you have one?

J: Ja, I do. gwalzer524 on Instagram asks how I think hometown boy Oliver Batista-Meier will do for us. I think he'll do well. He got thirty some minutes yesterday. He nearly scored and played in Murano. He'll be great. He's the natural successor to Marlon Ritter. Not that Marlon is anywhere close to done, but we now have two midfield wizards. The question is where does Pucci fit him in. After yesterday's performance, he's going to have to find a place for him.

W: Alright. Anything else?

J: No, not from me.

W: Okay, so go away now.

 

[Enrico Pucci]

Sunday, 20 August 2023

1pm-ish

'Well, what do you think my Italian-American husband of a man?" Gwen asked from across the picnic blanket.

"Yeah, it'll be fine," I said. "I'll miss you all but the kids will love Hawaii."

"Its only a week," she added.

"What a Hawaii, Daddy?" Allison asked.

"Its a place," I said. "Its a state in the United States of America. Its a series of islands in the middle of the Pacific Ocean."

"Whats the Capific ocean?" she asked.

"I can show you on a map book at home," I said. "Now eat your potato salad."

"The potatoes are silly," she said.

"Do they taste silly?" I asked. "What does silly taste like?"

"Like your b*tt," she said.

"Allison!" Gwen exclaimed.

I reached across the picnic blanket and speared another sausage.

"Heh, she said ****," Matthew added then resumed chewing.

"Will Elke come too?" Allison asked.

"Yes, Allison, Elke will be joining us," Gwen replied.