SaintMotbot's Premier League Chairman Game
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"Hello, Kirsty Gallacher here, with an amazing breaking news story just coming in from Newcastle United.
Mike Ashley has just confirmed that he is no longer the chairman or owner of Newcastle United as he has sold all of his shares to a consortium that will be holding a press conference in the next few moments.
So let's go live to St. James' Park to find out who the new owners of Newcastle United are."
"Hello and welcome to this hastily arranged press conference. Sorry there will be no questions answered today.
My name is Al Wilson and it has been my job to act as the negotiator in this deal between Mike Ashley and the consortium now in complete control of Newcastle United.
Now to read this short press release I would like to welcome one of the major members of Toon Tunes, Brian Johnson, legendary lead singer with AC/DC."
"We, at Toon Tunes, are delighted to have taken complete control of the only football club in the world for us. Each and every member of the consortium is a life long Toon fan and we can't wait to get this magnificant club back up to where we believe we should be.
Our fans are the greatest in the world and as such we should be rewarding them with the style of football that we all love and hopefully in a very short length of time we should be back challenging for European football not languishing at the bottom of the league.
Personally, this could not have come at a better time for me as it looks like my musical career has ended through medical advice. And what better way to spend your time in retirement than watching my beloved Toon.
Howay the lads!"
Mike Ashley has just confirmed that he is no longer the chairman or owner of Newcastle United as he has sold all of his shares to a consortium that will be holding a press conference in the next few moments.
So let's go live to St. James' Park to find out who the new owners of Newcastle United are."
"Hello and welcome to this hastily arranged press conference. Sorry there will be no questions answered today.
My name is Al Wilson and it has been my job to act as the negotiator in this deal between Mike Ashley and the consortium now in complete control of Newcastle United.
Now to read this short press release I would like to welcome one of the major members of Toon Tunes, Brian Johnson, legendary lead singer with AC/DC."
"We, at Toon Tunes, are delighted to have taken complete control of the only football club in the world for us. Each and every member of the consortium is a life long Toon fan and we can't wait to get this magnificant club back up to where we believe we should be.
Our fans are the greatest in the world and as such we should be rewarding them with the style of football that we all love and hopefully in a very short length of time we should be back challenging for European football not languishing at the bottom of the league.
Personally, this could not have come at a better time for me as it looks like my musical career has ended through medical advice. And what better way to spend your time in retirement than watching my beloved Toon.
Howay the lads!"
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Linecoigne1998
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View attachment 165295
July 1st 2015
Breaking news: new owner at Sunderland
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Reports are saying that Sunderland AFC, who have been struggling for quite a while now in the Premier League, have a new owner. And his name is......... JOHN CENA!!!!
The man who everyone thought supported Spurs apparently has changed his mind and has decided to buy Sunderland and attempt to take them to the very top. Reports are also suggesting that current manager Sam Allardyce will stay in charge for now as the American wrestler believes that Big Sam can carry the team to the top of the Premier League. In terms of transfers, there seems like there could be a couple of departures:
Transfer targets are unknown for Allardyce's side but with a transfer budget of about 100 000 pounds, there's not much Sunderland will be able to do unless they offload this summer.
July 1st 2015
Breaking news: new owner at Sunderland
View attachment 1036630
Reports are saying that Sunderland AFC, who have been struggling for quite a while now in the Premier League, have a new owner. And his name is......... JOHN CENA!!!!
[video=youtube;5LitDGyxFh4]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LitDGyxFh4[/video]
View attachment 165292
View attachment 165292
The man who everyone thought supported Spurs apparently has changed his mind and has decided to buy Sunderland and attempt to take them to the very top. Reports are also suggesting that current manager Sam Allardyce will stay in charge for now as the American wrestler believes that Big Sam can carry the team to the top of the Premier League. In terms of transfers, there seems like there could be a couple of departures:
| Player | Asking price |
| Valentin Roberge | 500 000 pounds |
| Duncan Watmore | Loan |
| Wes Brown | 200 000 pounds |
Transfer targets are unknown for Allardyce's side but with a transfer budget of about 100 000 pounds, there's not much Sunderland will be able to do unless they offload this summer.
SaintMotbot
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Southampton FC are delighted to confirm that despite the rumours surrounding a potential purchase of the club by a mystery investor, Katharina Liebherr has announced that she has no interest in selling her shares and has dedicated her future to the club.
"Southampton is a club and a city that was very close to my late fathers heart" Katharina said in a statement, referring to her father Markuss Liebherr, who saved the club from liquidation in 2009 but sadly passed away before he realised his dream of Saints reaching the Premier League. "It is my wish to honour that dedication and passion and give my all to this club to make sure it can be as successful as possible, both in a sporting and financial way."
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Southampton have also announced that Ralph Krueger will continue in his position as Chairman of the club, under the guidance of Miss Liebherr. "I am delighted to be continuing in my role here at this fantastic football club. Everybody here needs to be totally committed and pulling in the same direction for us to realise our dream of being a Champions League regular."
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Southampton FC are delighted to confirm that despite the rumours surrounding a potential purchase of the club by a mystery investor, Katharina Liebherr has announced that she has no interest in selling her shares and has dedicated her future to the club.
"Southampton is a club and a city that was very close to my late fathers heart" Katharina said in a statement, referring to her father Markuss Liebherr, who saved the club from liquidation in 2009 but sadly passed away before he realised his dream of Saints reaching the Premier League. "It is my wish to honour that dedication and passion and give my all to this club to make sure it can be as successful as possible, both in a sporting and financial way."
View attachment 165274
Saints Chairman Ralph Krueger, and Owner Katharina Liebherr.
Southampton have also announced that Ralph Krueger will continue in his position as Chairman of the club, under the guidance of Miss Liebherr. "I am delighted to be continuing in my role here at this fantastic football club. Everybody here needs to be totally committed and pulling in the same direction for us to realise our dream of being a Champions League regular."
View attachment 165282
Dedications left by Saints fans when the new of Liebherr's passing broke.
Transfer List
We would like to notify all chairmen of the availability of the following players.
Sadio Mane - £30 mil - Sold
James Ward-Prowse - £25 mil - Sold
Shane Long - £6 mil
Cuco Martina - £500k
Juanmi - £6 mil
Prices are negotiable and offers will be considered on other players.Transfer List
We would like to notify all chairmen of the availability of the following players.
Sadio Mane - £30 mil - Sold
James Ward-Prowse - £25 mil - Sold
Shane Long - £6 mil
Cuco Martina - £500k
Juanmi - £6 mil
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mark1reeve
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West Ham - Players for Sale
View attachment 1036686
David Cameron has announced that the following players are for sale immediately
Joey O'Brien - £1m - £25k p/w
James Collins - £500k - £35k p/w
Andy Carroll - £12m - £70k p/w
David Cameron has announced that the following players are for sale immediately
Joey O'Brien - £1m - £25k p/w
James Collins - £500k - £35k p/w
Andy Carroll - £12m - £70k p/w
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Vinny is a big Watford fan, and in a short statement he announced that he was delighted to be at the club, and was looking forward to building a team of hard-tackling, tough and strong players. He wants the team to go back to the old-school ways of the 1980's, and has already taken matters into his own hands, hiring Italian Massimo Carnevale to be the team's new manager. Carnevale is know for playing a direct 4-4-2, which should suit Jones' ambitions well.
In addition Vinny announced that any player at the club would be available at the right price, with the exception of Troy Deeney, who was the only player Vinny could see himself accepting at Wimbledon during his playing days.
Watford Takeover Completed
In a shocking announcement today. Watford football club announced that the ownership of the club had been transferred away from Gino Pozzo, the son of multiple team owner Giampaolo Pozzo. Pozzo senior has decided that the club is better served if left in the hands of his good friend:
Vinny is a big Watford fan, and in a short statement he announced that he was delighted to be at the club, and was looking forward to building a team of hard-tackling, tough and strong players. He wants the team to go back to the old-school ways of the 1980's, and has already taken matters into his own hands, hiring Italian Massimo Carnevale to be the team's new manager. Carnevale is know for playing a direct 4-4-2, which should suit Jones' ambitions well.
In addition Vinny announced that any player at the club would be available at the right price, with the exception of Troy Deeney, who was the only player Vinny could see himself accepting at Wimbledon during his playing days.
Transfer List Prices
Haurelho Gomes - £1M
Costel Pantilimon - £3M
Sebastian Prödl - £6M
Miguel Britos - £4M
Ikechi Anya - £5M
Ben Watson - £3M
Valon Behrami - £5M
Jose Manuel Jurado - £9M
Almen Abdi - £6M
Odion Igalho £18M
Haurelho Gomes - £1M
Costel Pantilimon - £3M
Sebastian Prödl - £6M
Miguel Britos - £4M
Ikechi Anya - £5M
Ben Watson - £3M
Valon Behrami - £5M
Jose Manuel Jurado - £9M
Almen Abdi - £6M
Odion Igalho £18M
Disclaimer89
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View attachment 165224
Michael Jordan completes the purchase of Spurs..
"I am extremely happy to have the keys in my hand so to speak. Now that my basketball playing days are behind me, I think it is time to own my own franchise!!
Although this morning I had been informed that I had not actually purchased thee San Antonio SPURS but some English soccer team...I'll learn from my mistake and not jump at another Gumtree ad again. Oh well, tomato tomahto..
The following players have been transfer listed...although majority of fringe and reserve players available for loan. I am not looking to sell my main stars"
Transfer List
Michael Jordan completes the purchase of Spurs..
"I am extremely happy to have the keys in my hand so to speak. Now that my basketball playing days are behind me, I think it is time to own my own franchise!!
Although this morning I had been informed that I had not actually purchased thee San Antonio SPURS but some English soccer team...I'll learn from my mistake and not jump at another Gumtree ad again. Oh well, tomato tomahto..
The following players have been transfer listed...although majority of fringe and reserve players available for loan. I am not looking to sell my main stars"
Transfer List
| Ryan Mason | 24 | MC | £5m |
| Tom Carroll | 23 | MC | £2.5m |
| Clinton N'jie | 21 | ST | £7.5m |
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Disclaimer89
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Hey you!
Stop trying to sell my players for me lol.
Or how many Andros Townsend are there in this game
Oh yeah...we are playing with the January update..****. haha *edited OP*
Steve McLaren has been released after just 20 days in charge of Newcastle United. The fans had already shown that they were not too pleased with his appointment in the first place and it was the opinion of the new owners that McLaren was not the right guy to lead them forward.
So I would like to welcome the new manager of Newcastle United, someone who I think could lead us on to something amazing................ Rafa Benitez.
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Players Available
Rafa has not wasted anytime on looking through the squads and here are some of the players that he is willing to leave the Toon this year.
as well as all under 21 and under 19 players available on loan.
So I would like to welcome the new manager of Newcastle United, someone who I think could lead us on to something amazing................ Rafa Benitez.
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Players Available
Rafa has not wasted anytime on looking through the squads and here are some of the players that he is willing to leave the Toon this year.
Rob Eliot - 29yo GK - £2m - £20k pw
Steven Taylor - 29yo D C - £4m - £40k pw
Jamaal Lascelles - 21yo D C - £2m - £15k pw
Jack Colback - 25yo DM / M C - £10m - £35k pw
Jonjo Shelvey - 23yo M C - £12m - £50k pw - SOLD
Gabriel Obertan - 26yo M R / AM R - £5m - £30k pw
Syvian Marveaux - 29 yo AM C / AM L - £5m - £4k pw
Papiss Cissé - 30 yo ST - £7.5m - £45k pw
Emmanuel Riviére - 25 yo ST - £7.5m - £35k pw
Steven Taylor - 29yo D C - £4m - £40k pw
Jamaal Lascelles - 21yo D C - £2m - £15k pw
Jack Colback - 25yo DM / M C - £10m - £35k pw
Jonjo Shelvey - 23yo M C - £12m - £50k pw - SOLD
Gabriel Obertan - 26yo M R / AM R - £5m - £30k pw
Syvian Marveaux - 29 yo AM C / AM L - £5m - £4k pw
Papiss Cissé - 30 yo ST - £7.5m - £45k pw
Emmanuel Riviére - 25 yo ST - £7.5m - £35k pw
as well as all under 21 and under 19 players available on loan.
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Manchester City Takeover announcement and Transfer List
In a quick turn of events, Manchester City has been acquired by a mysterious person, who prefers to call himself Don Corleone.
In an announcement, Corleone mentioned that he is Godfather to Manchester City family and that everyone call him the Godfather. It is unknown how or what was the deal that took place between the rich Arabian family and the Godfather, but it has been rubber-stamped nonetheless.
He has already announced that the following players cannot be part of the family anymore and has put them up for sale, for a price of course:
Gael Clichy - 7M
Martin DeMichelis - 1M
Fernando - 20M
Jesus Navas - 20M
Eliaquim Mangala - 15M
Wilfried Bony - 20M
Steven Jovetic - 15M
He will also be listening offers for any U21 players, except Jason Denayer.
In a quick turn of events, Manchester City has been acquired by a mysterious person, who prefers to call himself Don Corleone.
In an announcement, Corleone mentioned that he is Godfather to Manchester City family and that everyone call him the Godfather. It is unknown how or what was the deal that took place between the rich Arabian family and the Godfather, but it has been rubber-stamped nonetheless.
He has already announced that the following players cannot be part of the family anymore and has put them up for sale, for a price of course:
Gael Clichy - 7M
Martin DeMichelis - 1M
Fernando - 20M
Jesus Navas - 20M
Eliaquim Mangala - 15M
Wilfried Bony - 20M
Steven Jovetic - 15M
He will also be listening offers for any U21 players, except Jason Denayer.
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Liverpool Transfer List
Kolo Toure (DC) - £500k
Dejan Lovren (DC) - £10m
Joe Allen (MC) - £15m
Lucas Leiva (MC) - £15m
Christian Benteke (ST) - £25m
Mario Balotelli (ST) - £18m
Divock Origi (ST) - £10m (also up for loaning him out!)
Danny Ings (ST) - £12.5m
All prices are negotiable!
Kolo Toure (DC) - £500k
Dejan Lovren (DC) - £10m
Joe Allen (MC) - £15m
Lucas Leiva (MC) - £15m
Christian Benteke (ST) - £25m
Mario Balotelli (ST) - £18m
Divock Origi (ST) - £10m (also up for loaning him out!)
Danny Ings (ST) - £12.5m
All prices are negotiable!
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Chelsea FC Takeover Announcement
Chelsea FC can today announce that Roman Abramovich has sold off all his shares to one of his closest friends:
View attachment 165149
Russian president Vladimir Putin!
It is also believed that Mr. Abramovich will continue at the club as Mr. Putins most trusted advisor.
With this announcement, the Russian Leaders (as they would now like to be addressed) would like to inform everyone else that the following players are available:
Matt Miazga (DC) - £5m
John Obi Mikel (CDM/CM) - £10m
Ruben Loftus-Cheek (CDM/CM) - Loan
Loic Remy (ST) - £10m
Oscar (AMC/AMR) - £45m
Everyone else does have a price
Chelsea FC Takeover Announcement
Chelsea FC can today announce that Roman Abramovich has sold off all his shares to one of his closest friends:
View attachment 165149
Russian president Vladimir Putin!
It is also believed that Mr. Abramovich will continue at the club as Mr. Putins most trusted advisor.
With this announcement, the Russian Leaders (as they would now like to be addressed) would like to inform everyone else that the following players are available:
Matt Miazga (DC) - £5m
John Obi Mikel (CDM/CM) - £10m
Ruben Loftus-Cheek (CDM/CM) - Loan
Loic Remy (ST) - £10m
Oscar (AMC/AMR) - £45m
Everyone else does have a price
Telstar
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SWANSEA F.C.
Swansea has been taken over by Eric Cartman. When asked why he just replied "**** Jews!" and added "Respect my autoritaahh!"
Transfer List
Routledge - £4M
Montero - 6M
Barrow - 3M
Emnes - 2M
SWANSEA F.C.
Swansea has been taken over by Eric Cartman. When asked why he just replied "**** Jews!" and added "Respect my autoritaahh!"
Transfer List
Routledge - £4M
Montero - 6M
Barrow - 3M
Emnes - 2M
Jay Cartwright has took over crystal palace
When asked about the move jay said " I was fingering one of the cheerleaders and she mentioned they were for sale so I thought **** it, made a few extra sales in mine and rios shop and within a week I bought palace. The night was brilliant from them, you won't believe how many of the cheerleaders fit in my caravan and one of them ****** on my arm at one point during our 9some... Kinky"
Jay also mentioned how he once applied for the job at crystal palace but was turned down as "he was overqualified" he attached his cv from that day-
He also added that all players are for sale at palace, although bolasie and cabaye would be far too expensive for most teams.
"When I took Woking from the conference to the premier league in 5 seasons I kept the exact team but apparently I'm not allowed to be manager, so the manager might need more help than i did. We have agreed that the following people are for sale"
Joel ward 9m
Martin Kelly 8m
Pape souare 6m
James MacArthur 13m
Bakary sako 10m
Jason puncheon 7m
Frazier Campbell 5m
Lee Chung yong 5m
Marouane chamakh 1.5m
Alan pardew( manager) 500k
Jay is expected to be joined at crystal palace by his friends Will, Simon and Neil but there is rumours his football friend from West Ham trials could also be a part of it.
NORWICH TAKEOVER ANNOUNCED
View attachment 165088
Star City sisters, vigilantes and heroines The White Canary and The Black Canary have taken over the Yellow Canaries as Norwich announce new owners. This is an unprecedented move as the sisters who are part of the Green Arrow’s team take over active control over the Premier League Club. Normally operating under shadows the sisters proudly posed in front of the media as well as danced hard in the after party at a club in Norwich.
Clubs in premier league as well as their Chairman’s better be careful of the deadly duo as The White Canary or Sara was once a member of the League of Assassins and her sister The Black Canary is a vigilante and a brilliant lawyer.
Rejection of an offer from the Club might lead to the untimely death of another President as they both have quite a temper and known to use excessive force. In a short and terse statement, Sara said Alex Nell will be in charge for Now! Evaluation will be done on a monthly basis.
The Premier League sure is living up to its reputation of tar worlds most entertaining league with now crazy Chairman’s taking over.
View attachment 165088
Star City sisters, vigilantes and heroines The White Canary and The Black Canary have taken over the Yellow Canaries as Norwich announce new owners. This is an unprecedented move as the sisters who are part of the Green Arrow’s team take over active control over the Premier League Club. Normally operating under shadows the sisters proudly posed in front of the media as well as danced hard in the after party at a club in Norwich.
Clubs in premier league as well as their Chairman’s better be careful of the deadly duo as The White Canary or Sara was once a member of the League of Assassins and her sister The Black Canary is a vigilante and a brilliant lawyer.
Rejection of an offer from the Club might lead to the untimely death of another President as they both have quite a temper and known to use excessive force. In a short and terse statement, Sara said Alex Nell will be in charge for Now! Evaluation will be done on a monthly basis.
The Premier League sure is living up to its reputation of tar worlds most entertaining league with now crazy Chairman’s taking over.
In the aftermath of the Norwich takeover, Vinny Jones would like to remind everyone that all Watford players are available at the right price. Some may even be available quite cheaply.
A failure to bid for Watford players may very well lead to Vinny showing up on your doorstep one late Tuesday evening.
A failure to bid for Watford players may very well lead to Vinny showing up on your doorstep one late Tuesday evening.