The Alfa Romeo Metaphor

Monday, 18 May 2015 10am-ish

"Enrico, how are you?" Erik Samuelson said.

"I'm good, good, working hard at relaxing."

"Where did you pop off to?"

"Florence."

"Ahh, Florence," he sighed. "But it's early or at least still morning on a Monday, so you probably want to talk business."

"I do," I replied. "I would like to revisit your no money to agents policy. There's no way we can sign players in the higher leagues without paying their agents. And I hate 'em as much as any other guy, but I'm just saying we need to be realistic. I just got a call from an agent who represented some of my teammates from my playing days at Bologna. He's a legit guy who truly does look out for his player's best interest and doesn't play those bull**** games too many agents play. He's got a center back is furious with how Lazio have treated him and would be willing to talk to us."

"Well, I knew this day might come," Erik said. "But if you'll pardon me sentimentality, I'm just shocked it's come. What I mean to say, is I helped form the team in 2002 and enter them into the basement of the English football structure. We've taken principled stands on so many issues, agent fees being one of them. So we wouldn't have known about this player except through his agent?"

"Yes."

"Well, I guess he'll earn his fee if he ends up signing for us," Erik said. "Will you be able to watch him play?"

"I won't, but I trust the agent that he wouldn't be lying to me about his abilities," I replied. "Plus, I've watched some videos of him playing. He could be for real."

"Move ahead then," Erik said. "This is just a policy that the Don' Trust Board instituted. The full Supporter's Trust hasn't voted on it or anything. I'll get it stricken. Regardless, I don't want to ever be held hostage by some agent who makes his money by unsettling his players. I won't stand for it."

"Don't worry," I said. "Neither will I. Thanks, Erik."

"Don't work too hard, Enrico. You're supposed to be on vacation."

"Ciao."
 
View attachment 365340Here's the guy I want. He's Roman and a childhood Lazio supporter. Yet Lazio keep shipping him out to the southern hinterlands where he hates it. Last season to Salernitana who play in C1/B and in the city of Salerno. Salerno is south along the coast some 40 miles from Naples.

Then this season they ship him off to Crotone in C1/C. If Italy is a boot, Crotone is under the toe knuckle. They make no promises that his slaving away in the lower reaches will pay off. Nobody calls him or checks on him. His contract is up June 30th and is willing to talk to anyone.

What baffles his agent is that nobody in Italy is willing to look at him. As far as his agent can figure out, he hasn't done anything wrong but something is amiss.

"Andrea, how are you, this is Enrico Pucci," I said in introduction. "Carmelo said you'd be expecting my call."

"Ciao, Enrico," he replied.

"I'm vacationing in Florence right now and I want to bring you to London," I continued. "I manage a fan-owned club, AFC Wimbledon ..."

"Wimbledona?" he asks. "Vinnie Jonesa?"

"Yeah, that club," I replied. Italians always add a vowel to the end of most English names. "We just got promoted and I need young, strong and skillful center backs. I've seen your videos playing for Crotone and I'm hoping you're willing to listen."

"Yes, most definitely," Andrea replied. "I cannot stand living in small towns. I'm a city boy. I'm losing my mind in Calabria."

"Not only am I ready to rescue you, but you would be the fifth person at the club who speaks Italian," I said. "In addition to me, there's my left winger Matteo Nole, Argentine Leandro Depetris whose played mostly in Italy and my chief scout Lil Fuccillo."

"If you don't mind my asking, Crotone haven't approached you?" I asked. "You did just lead them to the C1/B title."

"No, but they know I'm not happy here," he replied. "They are very understanding and do their best to take care of me, but the training facilities are poor and the stadium is a pit."

"Just so you know," I admitted. "Our situation isn't ideal. We're improving our training facilities right now and we'll be moving into a new stadium in June of next year. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you it'll be like at Lazio or Arsenal. We're an up-and-coming club."

"I'll be fine as long as I'm not in the country," he said.

"Good to hear," I said. "Carmelo will be in touch with details, but in our initial discussions, I think our offer will be acceptable financially."

"I look forward to meeting you," he replied.

"Likewise, Ciao."

"Ciao."
 
Just dropping by again to say how incredible this story is. Brilliant!
 
Enrico Pucci said:
I can't tell if you're being facetious. Unless of course you're from the sky blue side of Manchester.
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if facetious means sarcastic then yes :D

I don't really have a team in England (being Scottish i support my local love Aberdeen) but if i had to pick a team from England it would be the other half of Manchester :P
 
whufc1966 said:
Just dropping by again to say how incredible this story is. Brilliant!
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THANKS!!

MatthewElphinstone said:
if facetious means sarcastic then yes :D

I don't really have a team in England (being Scottish i support my local love Aberdeen) but if i had to pick a team from England it would be the other half of Manchester :P
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Yes, sarcasm can be a part of facetious.
[h=2]fa·ce·tious[/h] [fuh-see-shuh
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thinsp.png
s]

adjective 1. not meant to be taken seriously or literally: a facetious remark.

2. amusing; humorous.

3. lacking serious intent; concerned with something nonessential, amusing, or frivolous: a facetious person.
 
Thursday, 21 May 2015

We're off to Milan today. We'll spend a couple of days there then off to Lake Como for a few days. A Bologna teammate of mine has a villa there. After that, we're heading to Cadiz with stops in Barcelona, Valencia and Granada.

The dangerous thing about going to Milan is how much clothing and accessories I'll be lugging around for Gwen. Hopefully, I can convince her to ship it back home rather than lug it with us. She's already purchased several handbags here in Florence.

I'm also on the trail of a two-footed attacking midfielder, forward. He's quick, young and fairly determined.

View attachment 365159

I won't give you the details of the list of players I've approached who weren't interested or whose salary demands were far beyond our humble means.

Though for the future, I did snare this kid:
View attachment 365158View attachment 365156
 
Sunday, 23 May 2015

Milan is freaking packed with tourists. Gwen doesn't seem to mind and I'm determined to not let it bother me. My soul feels replenished now that I've been eating Italian food for more than a week. I'm flying back to London tomorrow morning to complete deals for three players. I'll be back in Milan on the last flight.

I watched the Cadiz play-off match online. First, the champions of each of the El Segundo B sections play off home and away. The winners are promoted. Cadiz got off to a good start.

View attachment 365140View attachment 365139
 
Monday 25 May 2015

I made it to Kingsmeadow and it was still breakfast time. 6AM flights are rather efficient that way. That and no baggage.

I have several deals I intend to seal today. First is Manny Smith. Yes, another Smith, a third Smith. Manny was a beast in the back for York last season and really impressed me the two times we played them. He's a Birmingham boy and would probably have been perfectly happy to stay in York, but they haven't offered him a contract, yet.

He was on loan at York from Doncaster. Thankfully, Doncaster aren't paying attention or something and haven't told him **** about his future. Also, he'd be down the pecking order there. Whereas, I've professed my undying love and etc. I'm often shocked how little communication there is between clubs and their players. While I haven't had the opportunity to loan out any up-and-coming young players I intend to keep, when I do, I'm going to keep in touch with them.

Also, since he's English, I can't officially sign him up, but I sure can seal the deal and submit the official paperwork when the transfer window opens in June.

View attachment 365122View attachment 365121

I'm also signing Martin Riley in all ways but filing the paperwork. He was one of the reasons Mansfield had third best defense in League Two. His statistics don't look that great, but he sure as **** did a great job shutting down Michael Smith. And I can afford him.

View attachment 365120

And Mark Byrne will be a back-up to Daniel Barlaser in the center of midfield. He's inexpensive and very determined. I'm a firm believer that commitment is often more important than skill at this level.

View attachment 365119

This will conclude my player signings for the summer. I like getting my business done early.
 
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View attachment 365111Thursday, 28 May 2015

Gwen and I left Milan for Lake Como and my pal's villa. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, he has to leave on business. We're to get the key from the neighbors. He says the fridge is fully stocked and we can driver either of his cars. He's got an Audi R8 and a Mercedes. Cleaners come on Monday, apparently.

We took the train to Como then a bus up the coast. I gave the bus driver the address and showed him whereabouts I thought the place was on the map. The driver agreed to let us off.

Lake Como really does deliver. The early morning bus ride was spectacular. I'm a college drop-out, retired footballer, failed businessman and current football manager and even though I think I have a pretty decent way with words, Lake Como is not something I can adequately describe.

Gwen's giggly like a school girl. I guess Lake Como has impressed her, too.

Once we're settled in, I've got to start looking for coaches to fill out my backroom staff. Chairman Erik let me know that since we've been promoted, he'll allow me to add four more first team staffers.

Right now, Assistant Manager Sean Hankin handles defense and shooting. He was a defender when he played but understands the basics of shooting. I'd like to relieve him of the shooting instruction duties. I'll be looking for coach who can coach attacking and also has strong technique coaching skills.

Coach Matt Woolley covers attacking, ball control and tactics. That's simply too much work for him and now that I can hire extra staff, I'll be hiring a coach for tactics and one for ball control.

I'm also going to be adding another fitness trainer. Dave Wilson could use some help.

On the Youth Academy side, I'm not all that happy with the coaching there. While I didn't see much talent for them to work with, I'm also not entirely happy with all of my youth staff. So I'll be looking for a tactics and defense coach for the kids.
 
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View attachment 364853Monday, 1 June 2015

After the idyllic but incredibly touristy Lake Como, Barcelona is the complete opposite. Well, it's still touristy, too. This is ****ing June when it's packed to the bursting point with tourists. But it's urban. Maybe that's what I'm saying.

Chairman Erik recommended our scandinavian, minimalist hotel at the north end of the Ramblas. It's got a pool on the roof and a fantastic view of the city.

There's so much to see here. La Sagrada Familia, the church that Antoni Gaudi began a hundred plus year's ago. Only some 40 some years left to go. Parc Guell that Gaudi built. The other architectural gems that Gaudi left all around the city. The Ramblas. The medieval section. The Olympic complex and the fort on top of the hill.

And then there's the food. Oh. My. Fkn. God. This is no criticism of Cadiz nor of Andalusian cuisine. Love that, too. The tapas, the seafood, the blood sausage, the tapas, the chorizo, the paella, the tapas. I'm going to have to find me some Spanish restaurants in London. I didn't realize how much I miss Spanish food.

I'm making good progress on narrowing down my list of coach candidates. I've talked to several dozen. I'm going to need to go to London for a couple of days to talk to my final list.

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Wednesday, 3 June 2015

Well here I am back in London. I have interviews all day today and tomorrow with coaching candidates. Woot.

Gwen says she'll be fine alone in Barcelona. The hotel staff unsurprisingly have taken a liking to her and we've been spoiled rotten. She promised that between the pool on the roof, the book she wants to finish and the shopping opportunities available, she'd be fine. Repeatedly.

Can't wait to get back to Spain.
 
Oops, I forgot to check. Cadiz lost to Tenerife in the away leg in the First Phase section of the El Segundo B play-offs. But all is not lost. Tenerife and Lleitu get promoted and Cadiz join the survivors/winners of the Second Phase Round One. The Second Phase Round One is the round that the teams who made the promotion spots get to go through before they are paired against other survivor/winners or losers from the First Phase.

It's really complex and doesn't end until nearly July.

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Friday, 5 June 2015

Change of plans. Gwen wants to go to Cadiz sooner rather than later. Then she wants to go to Paris for a few days. So visiting Valencia falls off the itinerary and we'll spend a couple of days in Granada before visiting Cadiz.

With the help of Wimbledon staff, we've arranged several high profile cup competitions. This is how a club like ours can really rake in the pounds sterling.

Starting July, FC Red Bull Salzburg, Club Brugge and SK Sturm Graz visit for a Cup. We'll make a profit of around 80K.

On the 10th and 11th, Arsenal, Manchester City and Tottenham stop by for a wee little cup competitions. We should make around 200K but probably more because somebody will televise it.

The next weekend, Aston Villa, Blackburn Rovers and Chelsea visit for another cup. We should pull around 120-150K plus any TV money.

Finally, we round out the month with the Argentinian clubs Velez Sarsfield and Estudiantes. Standard Liege from Belgium was willing to pop across the channel for the fun. I expect to make some 80K to 100K from this'n.

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Here's the schedule for 2015/16 Sky Bet League One season. It starts 1 Aug 1015 and goes through the end of April 2016. It's going to be a long and brutal campaign.

Take special note of two dates: 14 November 2015 and 28 March 2016. That's when we play MK Dons. Those are huge dates on all AFC Wimbledon supporters.
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Enrico Pucci said:
Here's the schedule for 2015/16 Sky Bet League Two season. It starts 1 Aug 1015 and goes through the end of April 2016. It's going to be a long and brutal campaign.

League Two, thought you had just won this league ;-)
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