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Press Releases - anyone who misses the opportunity will risk their participation... (Deadline: Weds 18th Feb - "Next Update: December 2014)
 
Chelsea Owner Not Impressed

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We have been in touch with the Chelsea Owner after his first month at the helm of an English Football Club

Reporter - How do you feel you transfer buisness went?

Cool M Cool - Not well to be honest, i know little of football so left a lot of the deals up to my manager and im not impressed with the £25Million plus deal to sign Rafinha.

Reporter - Could you elaborate?

Cool M Cool - First off thats a lot of money for a player who looks likely to sit on the subs bench and secondly we could of bought Tiote and Vertonghen and had money to spare for £25Million!

Reporter - How about your first few games as Chelsea Owner, were you excited to get underway.

Cool M Cool - I was as i believed we had the best side in the league but we did not show that so far, A draw with QPR, a loss to Southampton and a lucky draw against Hull are not my ideas of a dream start for my supposed Title Challengers.

Reporter - Who do you believe had good and bad transfer windows?

Cool M Cool - Aston Villa lost Clark and Vlaar for nominal fees so thats the heart of their defence gone whilst i feel Arsenal got some decent value for the players they brought in with Konoplyanka quoted as a £20Million plus player not long ago.
I think Tottenham did well to get rid of Vertonghen and bring in Shawcross for the money they did but i have to say Southampton have yet again done the best overall buisness.


Reporter - What about your Title Rivals?

Cool M Cool - Well Man Utd did what they always try to do and thats buy the league spending over £70Million in the Summer were at least FFP seems to have reigned in Man City a bit.


Reporter - Well thats all here from Stamford Bridge and im sure the Chelsea Owner will have more to say in the coming weeks.

 
Chelsea Owner Not Impressed

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We have been in touch with the Chelsea Owner after his first month at the helm of an English Football Club

Reporter - How do you feel you transfer buisness went?

Cool M Cool - Not well to be honest, i know little of football so left a lot of the deals up to my manager and im not impressed with the £25Million plus deal to sign Rafinha.

Reporter - Could you elaborate?

Cool M Cool - First off thats a lot of money for a player who looks likely to sit on the subs bench and secondly we could of bought Tiote and Vertonghen and had money to spare for £25Million!

Reporter - How about your first few games as Chelsea Owner, were you excited to get underway.

Cool M Cool - I was as i believed we had the best side in the league but we did not show that so far, A draw with QPR, a loss to Southampton and a lucky draw against Hull are not my ideas of a dream start for my supposed Title Challengers.

Reporter - Who do you believe had good and bad transfer windows?

Cool M Cool - Aston Villa lost Clark and Vlaar for nominal fees so thats the heart of their defence gone whilst i feel Arsenal got some decent value for the players they brought in with Konoplyanka quoted as a £20Million plus player not long ago.
I think Tottenham did well to get rid of Vertonghen and bring in Shawcross for the money they did but i have to say Southampton have yet again done the best overall buisness.


Reporter - What about your Title Rivals?

Cool M Cool - Well Man Utd did what they always try to do and thats buy the league spending over £70Million in the Summer were at least FFP seems to have reigned in Man City a bit.


Reporter - Well thats all here from Stamford Bridge and im sure the Chelsea Owner will have more to say in the coming weeks.


Transfer window bosses me and koeman ;-)
 
That b*stard sold Vertonghen!!!

...I just noticed he signed Shawcross as a replacement and for only £8million. I guess that makes up for it! :p
 
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My managers getting sacked for selling Shawcross so cheap :D
 
Also...look at the mug shots of the managers...Martinez looks like he is confused about what he is doing, Koeman looks like he is having trouble passing the morning dump!
 
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Everton so far: The Results

Everton 3-0 Leicester

Steven Naismith (pen 19, 26)
Maynor Figueroa (53)


Stoke 2-3 Everton

Will Hughes (26)
Kevin Mirallas (50)
Moussa Sow (56)
Mame Diouf (57)
Hajime Hosogai (66)


Everton 5-0 Man Utd

Romeu Lukaku ( 6 ) (Did this due to face coming up.)
Moussa Sow (23)
James McCarthy (24)
Adnan Januzaj (52)
Antonio Cassano (78)

The Overview by Lewie Roberts:

"Wow. Just wow. Well, maybe I could expect 2 wins, and MAYBE 1 draw, but not 3 wins, and we're top of the league! :O First, we hammered Leicester 3-0, with Nasmith scoring 2 and new C2C signing Figueroa scoring one. Then, there was the tight 3-2 with Stoke City. We flew 3-0 up with goals from Will Hughes, Kevin Mirallas and Roberto Martinez's new signing, Moussa Sow. But, they got 2 back, with the goals from Hajme Hosogai and Mame Diouf. Luckily, they scored no more. Then. The miracle happens. Everton 5. Man Utd 0. They got HAMMERED! James McCarthy getting a goal and an assist to get MOTM, and also, in his 50 passes he made, he completed 45. So that is a 90% chance of completion. My surprise of the season so far HAS to be Sunderland, 6th with no signings! The disappointment so far has to be Spurs. I tipped them to fail and they are, placing in 15th. XD"
 
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Liverpool Terminators are terminating the opposition

Liverpool are sitting in 4th at this early stage in the season and we caught up with Mr Schwarzenegger to find out what he thought of it all.

SSN: How have you enjoyed your first month in charge?

Arnie: Well we are in a good position so far and I should be pleased but I'm not

SSN: Why is that?

Arnie: Those **** Toffee's are ahead of us! I cannot believe it! The other reason is because we have been playing so badly!

Arnie: The pre-season results were a sham, Southampton destroyed us and should have won by more! and We only managed to beat Burnley by FM'ing them!

SSN: Sounds like you are very unhappy with your managers work!

Arnie: I really am, I have had words with the Frenchie and have been reassured that we will be playing better football!

SSN: Anything you are regretting about the transfer window?

Arnie: I'll be honest, I miss Sturridge, His lovely smile and how he did that funny dance! It's upsetting to watch him rot on the bench at Man City, Might have to dig deep if I want him back though!


 
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Liverpool Terminators are terminating the opposition

Liverpool are sitting in 4th at this early stage in the season and we caught up with Mr Schwarzenegger to find out what he thought of it all.

SSN: How have you enjoyed your first month in charge?

Arnie: Well we are in a good position so far and I should be pleased but I'm not

SSN: Why is that?

Arnie: Those **** Toffee's are ahead of us! I cannot believe it! The other reason is because we have been playing so badly!

Arnie: The pre-season results were a sham, Southampton destroyed us and should have won by more! and We only managed to beat Burnley by FM'ing them!

SSN: Sounds like you are very unhappy with your managers work!

Arnie: I really am, I have had words with the Frenchie and have been reassured that we will be playing better football!

SSN: Anything you are regretting about the transfer window?

Arnie: I'll be honest, I miss Sturridge, His lovely smile and how he did that funny dance! It's upsetting to watch him rot on the bench at Man City, Might have to dig deep if I want him back though!



:D
 
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Southampton Chairman anounces new haircut



Southampton would like bid farewell to a player who has been with them through it all. Morgan Schneiderlin. after agreeing terms with PSG for a mere 13.5m.

goalkeeper paulo gazzanigga has also left to join... MAN CITY!?! obviously back up for joe hart but surely better keepers would of been available for a backup but for 300k he was cheap and cheerful.


on to the incomings by Koeman, proven to be a good buyer in the market koeman made the following signings:

Cristi Barbut 19 RW romanian 550k ACS Poli

Teofilo Gutierrez 29 ST colombia 2.7m River plate 34caps 13goals

Miguel Veloso 28 DM Portugual 4.9m Dynamo Kiev 29caps 2goals

Gabriel Angella 25 CB italy 5.5m Watford

Cheick Tiote 28 DM ivory coast 7.25m newcastle 46 caps 1 goal

CHairman Matthew Snook had this to say, 'i am dissapointed in koeman letting morgan go so cheaply but in getting Tiote and veloso in as replacements is fantasic both are great players and we still had a bit of change left over from morgan. i have never heard or seen angella or barbut play so i will reserve judgement on them till later. gutierrez is a good back up option as a ST overall i am pleased with these dealings.


top3 players
cheick Tiote 1 goal 1 assist 7.87
john stones 7.43
nathaniel clyne 7.40

results

2-1 vs liverpool
goals from tiote and munir on there debuts is a great start to the season. after the raping that liverpool gave us in the summer it was good to get the result over them.

1-0 vs sunderland
a quick bringing back down to earth, shows any team can beat anyone in this league

1-0 vs chelsea
Bouncebackability, a great result against another top team. gaston ramierez scoring the goal


 
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West Ham's announcement after the first month



Dear media, dear fans!
I have to give you a little announcement after the first month of the BPL. We played 3 matches and earned 1 win, 1 draw and -unfortunately- 1 loss, too. So we have 4 points and we're sitting in the 13th place just behind in goal difference from the 9th place. In sum we're delighted with the results. We also sold Winston Reid for BvB for 4million. We expected a much more, but we hope that he'll be successful in the future. We also expect a little bit results in the future but we have trust in our manager, Brendan Rodgers.
Thanks for the attendance.



Good luck for everybody in the next month. Actually Reid's prize is a little bit surprise.. but we have to go on. :D
Great job Borne, keep it up! :)

 
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