The Football Managing Mercenary

[DerbyJack]

That is painfully true. It's just struck me that some of these players are earning three times as much as me. I probably should leave signings to the Director of Football!

Cheers Battman! One day It'll be both!

---

December 2023

2nd December 2023
National League

With the mighty Doncaster Rovers looking on, it appear the boys were about to do my an almighty favor in my attempts at escaping the financial black hole that is now Bradford Park Avenue but despite the goal just seconds into the game we threw away the lead in five horrific minutes of football, leaving me flummoxed on the sidelines. Needless to say the news wasn't good...

5th December 2023
National League

Whilst I lick my wounds following the disappointing loss and another failed job interview the boys managed to scrape a point over a promotion chasing Leyton Orient. Unfortunately the game was somewhat dictated by an over-zealous referee who reduced the home side down to nine-men and awarded us a controversial penalty before fleeing the stadium. Now I know where the money is going.

12th December 2023
National League

With Exeter apparently believing my draw in the last game came from some kind of talent, the boys do actually manage to show up for the next game as we cruise our way past Morecambe. Despite the club finally recording a somewhat convincing victory and a clean sheet to go with it it once again proves to be not enough, with a mid-week injury adding to my woes...

16th December 2023
National League

As i take a step off the managerial merry-go-round and resign myself to seeing out the season in Bradford, the squad at least give me reason to keep the faith despite the spiraling finances as they thrash a sorry looking Halifax. Ironically the reformed young home-side could very well represent the future of a Park Avenue side leaking money like a sieve.


23rd December 2023
FA Trophy - 1st Round

The FA Trophy. I want it. With the boys struggling to lay down the law in the League I can at least hope that as one of the favourites in the competition we actually might have a chance of doubling my horde of silverware. A clinical brace from the spot ensures our progress into the next round for the time being.


26th December 2023
National League

Its fair to say the officals have been rather kind to us of late with Park Avenue finding themselves on the right side of Three penalties and Two Red Cards this month alone but they soon assured me they aren't part of the pay-roll as they send young Rikki Vine to the dressing-room with Grimsby quick to take advantage and claim a deserved victory.


30th December 2023
National League

Thankfully with the both teams able to keep all Twenty Two players on the pitch we take the chance to showcase our true talents with a convincing victory over lowly Dover. The visitors dared to score a late consolation goal late into the match but our brutal Irish poacher soon punished their impudence putting a gloss on the finish with a goal just before the final whistle. Ruthless.


December 2023
National League

Well. We're back. A much more encouraging month of football see's the club scrape its way into the playoff spots at long last. With half a season remaining we can only hope the boys push on from here. One things for sure with the club still very much under a transfer embargo, I won't be strengthening in the window anytime soon!


​

 

[DerbyJack]

January 2024​

1st January 2024
National League

The boys continue the New Year celebrations into a potentially challenging fixture against Chester as they pull off an outstanding display in front of a delighted home crowd. With Fielding putting his name in the running to make himself at home in the center of defence, its Aaron Connolly who steals the show with another impressive brace smoothing our way to victory.


9th January 2024
National League

Veteran defender Stubbs has strolled past my high-paid new signings to shore up a rather sloppy defence and capped an incredible run of form with a bullet header to set us on the way to a comfortable victory. The Stones have been the surprise package this season but a fear-less Ramsden quickly shrugged them off as he guides us to a three goal whitewash.


13th January 2024
National League

Ever since we destroyed them by six goals at the start of the season, my former club have been in sensational form but it seems their bubble has well and truly burst. Despite their slide The Gulls opened the scoring in just four minutes but my seemingly rampant team quickly put them back in their place with another three goals turning the tide in style.


20th January 2024
FA Trophy - 2nd Rnd

With eyes still very firmly set upon the Trophy, we leave it late to see off a seemingly spirited Halifax. Having once again found the back of the net Connolly looked set to guide us into the next round until a surprising Halifax leveller set the stage for Stubbs to deservedly steal the plaudits with a last second header keeping the dream alive. A good day all round for the travelling support...

27th January 2024
National League

Well that's one way to solve the clubs financial issues. A near Two and a half million pound loan nudges the club back into the black and the new fans trust is rewarded for their efforts with Ninety minutes of lifeless action. Thankfully a tense game kicked into life with just seconds on the clock as both sides trade last gasp goals for a deserved point.


January 2024
National League

Despite not losing a single game all month the boys are unable to make any more headway in the League as we remain routed in Seventh place. With the season once again seemingly set to go right down to the wire it's time to keep these recent run rolling and barrel our way into the a last minute promotion push. Now or never.


​

 

[Matticus88]

Great manager blog DerbyJack! as a Cambridge fan i was pleased to see you get Barry Corr in your side, IRL we got him back on a 1 month trial. and a interview with the U's too, quite disappointing to see them drop a league though. This game is great for the what-ifs.

Would it be too much trouble to show us the top 5 leagues in full at some point, at end of season perhaps. i like seeing how others games differ to what goes on in mine.

 

[DerbyJack]

Thanks very much Matticus! Definitley think he could do a good job for you guys based on what I saw in FM. If I can get him scoring Derry might just be able to as well!

Yeah sure I can try at the end of the season. Top five in this country or across Europe?

---

February 2024

3rd February 2024
National League

Aaron Connolly. Potentially the only thing giving me hope in deepest darkest Bradford. The Irish poacher never fails to give it his all every time he pulls on the kit and in another impressive display he see's off a deflated Yeovil to keep us very much in the hunt for the playoffs. We need to worm our way to the top and fast.


6th February 2024
National League

Continuing to lighten up my managerial career, Connolly strikes again with another lethal brace this time seeing off Aldershot. The Shots rarely threatened our relaxed defence with my attacking cohort repeatedly finding gaps in a sorry looking Aldershot defence as we romped to back to back home victories.


10th February 2024
FA Trophy - 3rd Rnd

With the clubs financial position looking still alarmingly poor the FA Trophy looks to be my route to salvation. No, not to earn this club any money but to actual put something on my still rather barren CV. With just the one solitary coaching badge to my name, I'm going to have to increase my reputation the hard-way. By winning things....not exactly my specialist subject.


17th February 2024
National League

Back to the League and our unbeaten run survives by the skin of its teeth as we narrowly hold off Altrincham. Having conceded within the opening fifteen minutes it seemed we were set for a disappointing afternoon in Manchester as the home side defended admirably but with just four minutes to go the ever reliable Ramsden kept our promotion push alive...


24th February 2024
National League

...and it's back onto life support. Making the short trip back to Manchester once again has the club on the back foot as we are broken down by a determined Salford. Having been so solid over the past few months my defence suddenly are back under the spotlight as they gift the mid-table side with three calamitous goals.


27th February 2024
National League

The boys are unable to instantly return to winning ways as they are held by fellow play-off chasers Boston. With both sides desperate to claim points at the business end of the season they threw caution into the wind with goals a piece right the way up to the end with a dramatic penalty seeing the Pilgrims match our pace right up to the final whistle.


February 2024
National League

Are we ever going to leave Seventh place? With the boys still clinging on to the season goal with just pure grim determination we head into the final two months of the season still desperate to find some more security further up the standings. With the title already looking out of reach, we can only hope to wrap up the play-offs quickly.

​

 

[DerbyJack]

March 2024

2nd March 2024
FA Trophy - 4th Rnd

Having never got this far in the competition I'm already picturing myself lifting the trophy in Wembley and the narrowest of two goal victories over my former club keeps the dream alive. The Gulls left us frustrated for the entire ninety minutes as they soaked up our attacking football with ease until their legs eventually gave out. Ramsden showed no mercy. On to the Semis!


5th March 2024
National League

With my focus now firmly shifted towards the glory of a cup victory, the boys thankfully remember to keep us well in the hunt back in the League as they demolish a strong Southend. With Connolly, Ramsden and Winnall all sparring for a starting spot we have rarely been troubled for goals, another four for their tally tightens our grip on the playoffs.


9th March 2024
National League

Our attempts at progressing beyond Seventh place are quickly shelved as we are held by Eastleigh. With former Ram, Winnall eventually making the breakthrough it seemed we would be on course for back to back victories until a goal in the final moments of the game saw the visitors steal the cruelest of points. This could prove costly.


16th March 2024
National League

As I briefly drag myself back to the reality of the League we do managed to restore our winning ways with a smash and grab victory over a resilient Blyth. The Spartans certainly took the game to us but in a display that restored my faith in over-paid defenders, Akinola not only kept them at bay but also volleyed home the only goal of the game to secure the points. Money well spent.


19th March 2024
National League

With a Semi-Final looming I managed to focus for one more League game with a less then convincing draw over Macclesfield. Having conceded in just Nine minutes I quickly returned to despising my defence but before I could once again bemoan paying them three times as much as the average player at this level, Ramsden saved their blushes with an equaliser.


23rd March 2024
FA Trophy - Semi Final Leg 1

As the only club to have beaten us in the past three months, Salford's early goal sent alarm bells ringing as my FA Trophy dream took a rather worrying blow. Thankfully continuing the trend of confusing the living **** out of me, the consistently inconsistent Akinola once again made up for his bloated wages with a well worked corner routine keeping my hopes alive.


26th March 2024
National League

To be blunt, I've stopped focusing on the League. Like a magpie I've been distracted by the shiny lure of an FA Trophy now tantalizingly close to our reaches but it seems the boys don't need me interfering. A convincing victory over playoff chasing Tranmere leaves us firmly in the playoffs but it certainly came at a cost...

30th March 2024
FA Trophy - Semi Final Leg 2

Wembley. I'm coming.

A horrifically tight game had both sides once again share the spoils with the lottery of penalties the only way to split both sides. Thankfully the boys managed to keep much more composure then myself as Devonte Redmond smashed home the winning penalty whilst I went progressively grayer as a sweaty heap on the sidelines.

Whilst I enjoy not only my first actual cup run but a place in the final to go with it, I quickly shift focus to the final and our future victims..

Ah Chester.

Known for it's zoo, picturesque town center and soon to be a humiliating day out at the home of Football. Having thrashed them at the start of the year hopes are high that we can pick up the Trophy at the end of the season.


March 2024
National League

Whilst I plan just how to arrange my FA Trophy alongside the National League South title in my rather barren Trophy cabinet the boys have actually managed to put us firmly into the playoffs with an impressive unbeaten month of football. With the season now barreling towards a dramatic end, we still have it all to play for. Glory surely awaits!



​

 

[PatrickLFC]

Not sure what I'd rather read about, your triumphant masterminding of an FA Trophy victory, or a furious rant about the players letting you down on the big stage! Good luck in the Final, and the promotion chase!

 

[darren151991]

What a month march was, unbeaten!!!!

 

[Matticus88]

Thanks very much Matticus! Definitley think he could do a good job for you guys based on what I saw in FM. If I can get him scoring Derry might just be able to as well!

Yeah sure I can try at the end of the season. Top five in this country or across Europe?

---

​

We had Corr before but he was quite fragile, when his fit, his brilliant for league 2. Just the uk tables is fine

edit: 5th march you typed Southend instead of Southport Great work in the trophy too, i went to Wembley for the U's play off final v gatehead, didn't goto the trophy final though. twice to wembley, a trophy and a promotion was a very good year

 

[DerbyJack]

Thanks Patrick...I think. In all the time of doing this I'm not sure I've ever won a cup? Thanks for all your support as always, your likes are really appreciated!

Cheers Darren, was a little surprised myself!

Just checked the first team, he's certainly got some competition for a starting place! Will do, I'll add it to the end of season stuff!
Thanks for the heads-up, I'm pretty sure I do that near enough every time we play them! I'll just settle for one trip to Wembley right now! Cheers Matticus!

---

April 2024

6th April 2024
National League

With almost two months to wait until my day out in the Capital, there's plenty of time to finish off the job in the League and in an impressive start to the penultimate month of football we demolish our way through a spirited Havant & Waterlooville. With the boys seemingly fired up for our late playoff push I thought this would be a month to sit back and reap the rewards...


9th April 2024
National League

...I was wrong. Despite Winnall firing us into the lead, we are unable to keep Flyde at bay with our fellow playoff hopefuls deservedly working their way back into the game before claiming all three points following a one-sided second half of football. A disappointing afternoon, made all the worse by another bruising injury. The footballing gods are stirring.

13th April 2024
National League

It was this this challenging set of fixtures that ended our slim promotion hopes at the midway stage of the season and with my free-scoring strike force now whittled down to just veteran striker Sam Winnall, it seems they are about to do the same to our playoff chances too. A disappointing loss and a red card against The O's throws us back into uncomfortable territory.


16th April 2024
National League

Cambridge are hammering on the door in their attempts to re-enter the Football League but despite both clubs having it very much all to play for at this crucial stage of the season they opted to give their defences the day off. A free-scoring game of football saw Aaron Connolly make his return from injury off the bench as we claimed what could prove to be a critical point.


20th April 2024
National League

Any hopes that the Eight goal draw with a club dueling it out at the top of the table might have been a sign of resurgence from the boys is quickly squashed as we are harshly seen off by Chesterfield. The Spireites have not enjoyed the best of season since their relegation but in a brutal late flurry of action they at least saw fit to not be alone in their disappointment...


April 2024
National League

...Christ. We're bottling it.

With just one solitary game remaining and my attention still very much focused on a shiny object and a day out to Wembley, the final month of football this season is going to be incredibly tense. With the boards season objective very much hanging in the balance I should probably concentrate on salvaging this League campaign...

nah. I'm in it for the trophy.

​

 

[dporter8999]

Hands down my favourite story on the site, fingers crossed you win the cup this year!

 

[DerbyJack]

Thanks so much dporter, hopefully some silverware can keep it vaguely respectable!

---

May 2024

4th May 2024
National League

A dramatic month of football gets underway in fitting style as we squeeze our way past The Shrimpers. With our very playoff hopes seemingly hanging on by a thread, experienced striker, Sam Winnall took the opportunity to become an instant fan favourite as his hat-trick not only see's off Morecambe but salvages the entire season...

May 2024
National League

With the club starting the month haplessly looking at the play-offs from the outside in, we actually manage to overturn our horrific run of form to finish in a deceptively comfortable sixth place. With a host of strong teams joining us in the playoffs this certainly isn't going to be easy for a bruised and battered squad.



May 2024

7th May 2024
National League

...So. That was worth it. Having barely made our way into the playoffs at all, the boys are instantly dumped straight out just three days later. Heartless. A tense game at the Edgeley Park saw the game go into extra-time with the home side eventually finding a breakthrough just before the break as my deflated squad collapsed in disappointing fashion.

Bodes well for Wembley...



May 2024

26th May 2024
FA Trophy - Final

Aaron Connolly. Take a bow.

A horribly tense final saw me once again a quivering wreck come the final whistle as we claim the Trophy by the slenderest of margins. Having gone a goal down almost instantly it seemed we were in for a torrid time at Wembley but in fitting fashion my free-scoring strikers leveled the game up with our Irish poacher capping an impressive attacking display with a last-gasp winner.

I've got a taste for this now...

With my second trophy of my career quickly stashed away into the cabinet, it would normally be the time for any decent manager to pat the boys on the back, bask in the adoration of the clubs supporters and take a well earned break for the Summer...

...I on the other hand will be quickly spreading my newly buffed CV far and wide, not even Silverware can salvage this clubs dire finances.

It's time to move on.


​

 

[Matt G]

Nice one! If that doesn't get you a League manager's gig, I don't know what will.

 

[ninjaskill]

You don't have seem to like scoring and conceding late goals, but that was a big one always nice to get a trophy

 

[Worthy15]

Unlucky on missing out on promotion, however congratulations on your FA Trophy win!

You may not be such a bad manager after all....until the next post.

 

[Matticus88]

Great job getting the trophy

 

[Death Ball]

Yay, some silverware. Now you may get a bit pay rise and, if you're creative with your accountability, you can melt that silverware, sell the silver and include it as your salary for this next season.

 

[DerbyJack]

Cheers Matt, here's hoping!

Keeps it dramatic I guess. Seriously though this season alone has aged me by 5 years. Cheers Ninja!

Cheers Worthy, thankfully for anyone new here, the last two season have actually made me look pretty special! It's a new feeling!

Thanks alot Matt

This is why your still remaining as my key adviser Deathball. This out the box thinking will get us right to the top....or sectioned in a care home. Either way it will be glorious!

---

With my reputation slightly boosted with my second trophy of my career, I take another step closer to breaking into the Football League.

Meanwhile at the top of the game, it's been a season of almost complete change...

​

Massimiliano Allegri	Diego Simeone	Unai Emery
Manchester City	Chelsea	Manchester United
£160,000 per week	£150,000 per week	£94,000 per week

The Special One is gone...

Seven years of dominance at Old Trafford unceremoniously comes to an end with Allegri not only ending his dominance at the top of the earnings but also at the top of English football.

A second League title for the new City boss has the Italian burst to the top of the game but having just seen off Jose, two new challengers have arrived in the home of football...

Diego has finally left Spain.

A forty thousand pound pay-cut greets the Argentinian at Stamford Bridge as he continues to remain as the constant runner-up in our race to the top, with Spaniard, Unai Emery now hot on his heels as the new manager of the reformed Red Devils.

Meanwhile for myself, there might just be a chance to bridge this massive gap...

Derby Jack

Bradford Park Avenue

£1000 per week

Whilst I cautiously await responses from a host of struggling Football League sides, I can't help but feel I'm trapped in Bradford.

With my history of bouncing in between cash-strapped clubs ensuring I'm unable to squeeze any form of coaching badge out of them, I sit seven years further down the line with just a lowly National C Licence to my name. Hardly enough to attract a significant move up the standings.

Unless one of these three clubs comes in for me, we might have to earn our way into the Football League the hard-way.

Joy.

​

​

 

[Matt G]

At least you're getting interviews

 

[DerbyJack]

This is true but I feel I'm more there to make up the numbers!

No Derby game today so I'm going to rinse out some FM to make up for it!

---

It's now seven seasons since I started this rather pathetic career.

Whilst I've been lingering in the depths of the National Leagues the rest of the footballing world has been continuing to spread joy and despair.

In order to save this from being a huge post here's a very brief look at the movers and shakers across English League football and in the continent...​

2023/24
Premier League

Having ended five years of United and Mourinihio dominance last season, City continue to reign supreme at the top, with their second title in a row ensuring Manchester remains blue. The rest of League looks altogether rather familiar with Bournemouth, West Ham and new-boys Fulham all sent packing to the Championship.​

2023/24
Championship

I'm starting to question Football Manager now. Watford, Brentford and Millwall make it a good year of Championship football in the capital but it's the relegation of The Mighty Rams that really stands out here. I would love to say this is some kind of glitch but this is the Rams second relegation to League One in Three years...​

2023/24
League One

...Well now this is just plain ridiculous. With The Rams relegation, they are replaced by their once smaller Neighours Burton Albion and East-Midland rivals, Forest. Meanwhile its a season to forget for Notts County, Forest Green Shrewbsury and my current cross town rivals, Bradford however it's surely Sunderland fans that are truly feeling the pain at this level...​

2023/24
League Two

It's pretty much business as usual down in League Two with the only real surprise coming in the shape of the rapidly raising Billericay as the millionaire backed club now begin to challenge for promotion. Most importantly for myself, my bitter managerial rival, Alex Meecham suffers relegation and a sacking as his Northampton side slide into Non-League football. Justice.​

2023/24
Europa League

Stoke in the Quarter-Final? The continental cups have gone insane. A disappointing season for Spurs is capped as they not only miss out on Europe in the League but also the Europa League title as Real Sociedad pip them to the post winning a tense final on Spanish soil.​

2023/24
Champions League

With Liverpool and Monaco winning the first two Champions League trophies of my career it took a while for the big boys to assert themselves in the continent but with four years of United, Chelsea and Madrid sharing the title, the return of an Italian giant restored the unpredictability of the competition as Napoli scoop the title at Old Trafford.​

_______

As we progress through the years and potential across the continent, I'll try and keep this updated with the relevant Leagues and the best competitions around the globe, if anyone wants to see just where their club ends up in the not so distant future just give me a yell and I'll happily dig it up.

Having taken a step back and observed the world of football beyond my narrow view of the National League, one thing has very quickly dawned on me...

...I've achieved almost nothing of note.

Brilliant.​

​

 

[DerbyJack]

With my name in the running for three Football League sides, I was decidedly pessimistic about my chances.

Despite being out of contract with my current club and with the National League South title and the imperious FA Trophy behind me, I still find myself unable to convince any football league chairmen.

With my coaching qualifications decidedly lacking, the expected disappointment soon rolled in...

Back to the grind...

_______

With my sentence in the National League seemingly extended for another season I quickly set about adding the finishing touches to my FA Trophy winning side.

The route to the football league refuses to get any easier.

Time to forge a squad capable of dragging me there...

A duo make their permanent departures from the club as we manage to bring in a much needed Thirty thousand pounds to the clubs lowly coffers.

It seems English stoppers are in high demand lately with clubs seemingly falling over themselves to sign our rather unimpressive goalkeeping duo, A surprising offer from the Championship's QPR see's Dubidat burst into the football league in envious fashion.

Following him goes Sam Winnall. The veteran striker requested his transfer almost as soon as our promotion hopes disappeared, with League Two's Luton splashing the cash to bring in him for the season ahead.

With just a duo of transfers out of the club, the majority of leavers comes in the shape of Eleven departures.

With the majority of them coming in the shape of numerous Youth players failing to make the grade in the first team, the only main departures come in the shape of Bunney, Edwards and Lelan.

The trio featured very sparingly in the previous season with all three seemingly incapable of making an impact at this level, their departures will have little impact upon the squads chances this season.

Time for the real work to begin...

From: Out of Contract
Cost: Free​

Following a long and frustrating spell on the sidelines with Brighton, the unstoppable Josh Ward has finally been unleashed with Bradford Park Avenue quick to ****** up the impressive winger. With a deft first-touch and an impressive engine behind him, the teenager should make a massive impact at this level.

From: Out of Contract
Cost: Free​

With Morgan Dubidat somehow securing a move into the Championship, we quickly made the move to bring in a replacement stopper, in the shape of Thomas Perry. With young English stoppers apparently at a premium, Park Avenue quickly made the move to bring in a stopper with a taste of Football League experience following a frustrating spell with Scunthorpe.

From: Crystal Palace
Cost: On Loan - End of Season​

With the club still pouring money out without a care in the world I opted to take things into my own hands as we moved into the loan market to fill in the remaining gaps in the squad. With Winnall departing we were in need of another finisher to add some depth to our already impressive front line with Palace's young prodigy, Leon Jones fitting the bill perfectly.

From: Fleetwood
Cost: On Loan - End of Season​

Second loan signing of the window has us add some much needed style down the wings. With the ability to easily work his way into the team and the technical ability to make himself more then a handful for this League's right-backs the Fleetwood winger easily pushes Blair Turgot onto the bench as he makes himself at home in the starting eleven.



Things just got a lot more convincing.

With a core squad already behind us, the club was already well on course to make an impact in the season ahead but with four more additions we now look odds on to finally make a challenge for the title.

With my patience wearing thin and the Football League still frustratingly out of my reach the entire squad is going to need to be at the top of their game.

It's automatic or bust time...

​