The Football Managing Mercenary

[DerbyJack]

Preseason 2024

13th July 2024
Friendly

We kick the pre-season off with a narrow victory over touring Scottish side Annan. I might have resigned myself to another season in the National League already but at least with a gritty victory over the visitors the boys have proved they are prepared to grind out for the victory already. Pure determination alone could just about make the difference at this level.


20th July 2024
Friendly

Having turned me down earlier in the Summer, an unexpected victory over our bigger neighbours at least gives me some satisfaction over the recently relegated side. A convincing turn-around from my young squad saw a penalty kick-start their comeback with the ever impressive Ramsden sealing a deserved victory.


24th July 2024
Friendly

Continuing to life my deflated spirits the boys absolutely annihilate Oxford City, with Irish striker, Aaron Connolly taking the opportunity to showcase his talents to the crowd with five sensational goals seeing off the non-league side in style. I might not have wanted to be here but this sensational strike force is proving to be more then worth my time in Yorkshire.


2nd August 2024
Friendly

Having seen off every challenger thus far, Premier League side Leicester proved to be one step too far as they run out four goal winners. Ramsdens opening goal once again highlighted our strengths up front but Park Avenue's moment in the Sun lasted just a couple of minutes before the Foxes quickly restored normality.


5th August 2024
Friendly

Rounding off a promising pre-season, our ever impressive strike duo are at it once more as they combine to overcome a spirited Newport Pagnell. Having shot into a three goal lead it seemed we were set to head into the season in the finest of fashion before the home-side pulled out the stops to ensure a nervy ending to the game



Deflated, frustrated, financially depleted.

At the end of the season my time in Bradford had me wandering if I was ever going to make it out of the fringes of Non-League football.

One solid transfer window and some emphatic pre-season results later and suddenly things are already looking a **** of a lot better.

It might not be a glamorous raise to the top but with these boys we might just make it.

The Football League is calling...


​

 

[DerbyJack]

August 2024​

10th August 2024
National League

The season gets underway much as it ended as we are once again up against FA Trophy finalists Chester. With the boys showing massive signs of intent in the pre-season, they thankfully carried it over into the first game of the season with an emphatic victory on the road. Early warning shots already fired at the rest of the League contenders.


17th August 2024
National League

In uncharacteristic fashion my usually reliable strike force disappear in the very next game as we are held by a resilient Spennymoor. Thankfully despite the strikers taking the early opportunity for a rest day, the defence well and truly showed up as they held on for what would prove to be a familiar clean sheet in an impressively tight month of football.


20th August 2024
National League

...They're back. In fine fashion the boys instantly prove themselves once more as they roll over Ten-man Orient. Despite loanee striker, Jones and the free-scoring Ramsden both finding the back of the net it was hat-trick hero Devonte Redmond that stole the show, as the play-making midfielder takes matters into his own hands to continue our early run.


24th August 2024
National League

My reformed defence has been the story of this solid first month as they once again shut up shop against those filthy footballing hipsters, Dulwich Hamlet. Capping their impressive month, the vastly improved Akinola finds himself making the difference at the other end of the pitch as his thunderous header seals the points late into the second half. With the points rolling in I soon had a change of heart...

31st August 2024
National League

With another season at Bradford tied up, the backline is instantly breached to reward my loyalty in fitting fashion. With the Pilgrims controlling the majority of the game, a late mistake saw us perhaps undeservedly claim a point thanks to the lethal touch of Aaron Connolly as Boston return home with only one solitary point and a late red card for their troubles.


August 2024
National League

An unbeaten and defensively solid month of football has the boys instantly shoot their way into title contention. With the clubs at the top already asserting themselves at this early stage we still have plenty of work to do in order to claim that solitary automatic promotion spot but the early signs are promising.

I might have made hard of it but the Football League could truly be within reach...

​

 

[brooksey84]

Inspired to do my own one of these starting as a journey man may follow the money or wait for people to approach me direct. In the Welsh prem to start with Llandudnao.

 

[DerbyJack]

Glad to hear it Brooksey, best of luck. Going to be one **** of a challenge making your way our of Wales I imagine!​

---

September 2024

2nd September 2024
National League

The defence might have stolen the plaudits in the previous month but its a return to form as we kick start September. The unflappable duo of Connolly and Ramsden once again prove to be too much for some of the League's best as we narrowly overcome a Maidstone side who led the League for the majority of last season. It's our turn now.


7th September 2024
National League

Southport have been floating around the playoffs for quite some time of late but despite their undoubted quality the boys pull off an efficient display to add another three points to our impressive tally. Irish sharpshooter Aaron Connolly is enjoying the form of his life at Bradford Park Avenue, with his fine form we could well blow the rest of the competition out the water.


14th September 2024
National League

With the points rolling in we are eventually stumped by a Telford side keen to mount a promotion bid of their own. With on-loan striker Ward smashing in a convincing penalty and the ever reliable Connolly putting us into a hard earned lead at the break, The Stags emerged into the second with wave of relentless attacks eventually breaking down our beleaguered defence.


18th September 2024
National League

Flyde's time in the football league last just the one solitary season before they are sent crashing back down into Non-League football. A Connolly inspired four goal victory quickly highlights just how the down-trodden side ended up back in our midst as we cruise our way back to winning ways.


21st September 2024
National League

Well it had to end at some point. The clubs first taste of defeat comes at the hands of former League Two side, Northampton. With my Managerial rival, Alex Meecham unable to keep the Cobblers afloat, they now find themselves desperately attempting to make a quick return to the Football League with a ruthless second half comeback keeping them well in the running.


28th September 2024
National League

Having thrown away the victory in the previous game, the boys very nearly repeat the trick to round off the month as a late surge from Dover see's the lowly home side smash home two goals in quick succession to seemingly ****** the points. Thankfully young Palace striker, Leon Jones remains ever dangerous from the bench as his fresh legs help us secure a dramatic point.


September 2024
National League

With just the one loss to the name and perhaps one two many draws we find ourselves sitting in third place behind a couple of Non League 'giants'. With both an unbeaten Tranmere and Chesterfield keen to restore their Football League status this season, it seems we are in for quite the challenge.


​

 

[DerbyJack]

October 2024

5th October 2024
National League

On the back of a bruising defeat and a fortunate draw the boys respond in emphatic fashion as they destroy Grimsby. With points at a premium even at this early stage, the continued form of both Ramsden and Connolly will at least keep us well in the running for what is proving to be a fierce title race.


9th October 2024
National League

Making it six goals in two games without reply the boys continue to impress in October with a comfortable victory over Hampton & Richmond. Having won the League itself just two seasons ago the away side are really suffering on their return to Non-League football.. It seems keeping away is just as hard as escaping. Bodes well.


12th October 2024
National League

Another clean sheet, another three points....all be it in rather narrow fashion. A tense game between both ourselves and Boreham Wood seemed set for a bore draw but with time ticking down and Boreham seemingly settling for a point, that man Aaron Connolly decided to showcase his talents with a driven last minute winner. Winning Ugly.


19th October 2024
FA Cup - 4th Qual. Rnd

The FA Cup rears its head and despite being deep into a promotion hunt the boys still manage to turn up for the Cup as they see off National League North side Darlington. Despite being in the division below the Quakers opened the scoring in just six minutes but in fine style they soon shot back as we reclaimed the lead just before the break. On to the next round!


26th October 2024
National League

At the early running it seemed Salford were set to finally mount their drive into the Football League but just two months in and it seems the wheels have once again fallen off. A Ramsden brace and a calamitous own goal ensure a disappointing afternoon for Scholes and Co. We're in fine form as we barge our way further up the standings. Who can stop us?!


30th October 2024
National League

...Halifax. Halifax can stop us. For the first time this season the boys taste defeat without finding the back of the net. In what was easily the most disappointing performance of the season the team failed to show up from back to front as an FC Halifax side currently stuck in mid-table cruise to an emphatic victory.


October 2024
National League

Putting the end of month result a-side it's another impressive run of results from the Park Avenue boys. With Tranmere finally tasting defeat themselves they've quickly been chucked from the top of the table as Chesterfield pick up the pace to sit just two points ahead of us. We need to cling on to their coat-tails.


​

 

[TheBattman]

This is the year DJ

 

[Brane_Orsou]

This season surely!

 

[DerbyJack]

Cheers Gents! Keep the faith!

---

November 2024

2nd November 2024
National League

A top of the table clash gets November started with a spirited performance from the Park Avenue boys pegging the League leaders back as we look to keep close to their impressive pace. Having gone two goals down before the half hour mark it seemed we were set to be reminded of our place as continual play-off fodder until the on-loan Leon Jones fired us straight back into the game.


9th November 2024
FA Cup - 1st Rnd

We make it past the First round of the competition for what could potentially be the first time of my career as we pull off an impressive smash and grab victory over League Two's Barrow. A quick-fire goal from Ramsden saw the boys spark into life in fine fashion with sheer determination alone keeping hold of our slender lead. Apparently my early cup run didn't go unnoticed...

16th November 2024
National League

So...Tranmere are back.

Having lost their place at the head of the table, the former Football League side are seemingly desperate to reassert themselves upon the League with a ruthless victory seeing the experienced side rip apart my once steadfast squad. With five goals cancelling our another Ramsden opener it was a bruising afternoon for both the club and my ego.


23rd November 2024
National League

With another chance at the Football League within my grasp the boys put on a stellar display to make some amends for their thrashing in the previous game as they put on a magnificent display of attacking football of their own to smash ten-man Torquay. Unfortunately despite the humiliation of my former club it apparently wasn't enough to fast-track my route into the Football League...

27th November 2024
National League

The boys thankfully make it slightly easier to ignore the fact that Wes ****** Brown just made it into Football League management before i could as they smash their way through Aldershot. A seemingly ruthless Aaron Connolly took the game to the away side from the first whistle as his impressive hat-trick ends a relatively barren run for our free-scoring Irishman.


30th November 2024
National League

Having this time been on the wrong side of an early goal the boys responded magnificently as a beautiful corner from our pivotal play-maker, Devonte Redmond forced a calamitous own goal before the ever impressive strike-force took up the reigns to see off the Spartans in emphatic fashion.


November 2024
National League

Despite a rather monumental slip up against a third place Tranmere the club responds in thankfully rapid fashion as we quickly return to winning ways. With Chesterfield still managing to hold the chasing pack at bay, the lead three teams are all now starting to build a gap over the playoff hopefuls.

No room for mistakes, this is looking like it's going down to the wire!


​

 

[DerbyJack]

December 2024​

3rd December 2024
National League

With the boys seemingly constantly reminded of the need to keep the points coming in thick and fast they instantly see themselves distanced as they slip up against a lowly Morecambe. A goal just before the fifteen minute mark saw The Shrimpers claim a well deserved lead with Ward's penalty salvaging a point for the team as we clung on for the final whistle.


7th December 2024
FA Cup - 2nd Rnd

It might not have been the big cup tie the fans were hoping for but a thrilling match against fellow National League side Telford saw neither side able to take advantage of a potential easy route to a Premier League clash in the next round as they share six goals a piece. Despite the disappointing draw it seems my stock has already risen as the Managerial merry-go-round whirls into life...

10th December 2024
National League

With some of the Football League's most desperate clubs and a surprising move to Holland potentially on the cards, a narrow victory over Macclesfield see's me at least hold some good standing in the interview process as Leon Judges second-half braces goes someway to cover up my lack of Coaching badges. Apparently victories work wonders...

14th December 2024
National League

With League Two new boys and last seasons National League winners, Cambridge unable to beat my current earnings from a once affluent Park Avenue board its a return to League action as my contingency plan of automatic promotion continues to grow stronger. The three points towards our growing tally proved to be all the more valuable as I checked my inbox after the game...

18th December 2024
FA Cup - 2nd Rnd Replay

With my hopes of breaking out of the National Leagues once again falling to the wayside, I can at least take some solace from a hard-earned route into the potentially money-spinning third round. Another thrilling cup tie against The Stags saw us narrowly emerge winners and the impressive result apparently gave me one more surprise shot at finally escaping these non-League depths...

21st December 2024
FA Trophy - 1st Rnd

...Didn't want it again anyway.

In disappointing fashion our attempts at holding on to the FA Trophy die almost before they began as we are chucked out of the competition in the first round courtesy of a lowly York. Whilst I try to convince myself that this is a positive, allowing us to now concentrate on the League it quickly emerges that I no longer need to worry about such trivial things...

December 2024
National League

Seven and a half seasons, Five clubs, Two sackings and One League title.

Finally I am free.

Ironically my time in the depths of Non-League football end as I'm finally within reaching distance of breaking out of the National Leagues in Title winning fashion. With the club poised on the edge of promotion and a place in the Third Round of the FA Cup, I leave the club distracted at this seasons prospects before they can realise just what kind of damage I did to their finances.


​

 

[ninjaskill]

Congrats on the move, will leave you just out the top 3 managers for pay I'm guessing though

 

[dporter8999]

FINALLY!!!!! Hopefully they aren't as terrible as they are currently!

 

[Brane_Orsou]

Congrats on the move my friend, long over due

 

[TheBattman]

Fantastic, come on DJ. Just hoping they aren't wallowing at the very bottom of League 2! Let us know who BPA get in the Cup and if they fall away without your expertise

 

[Sammuthegreat]

Great stuff. More importantly though - where's Meecham?

 

[Matt G]

Barnet! That'll do nicely

 

[DerbyJack]

Thanks Ninja! It's not exactly a tidal wave of an impact on the standings....more a slight ripple.

Cheers dporter! Yeah I've always considered Barnet somewhat of a Football League yo-yo club...time to break that trend...hopefully!

Thanks alot Neavie! It's felt a lot longer then it actually was!

Will do Battman! Thanks as always. Not quite at the foot of the standings but still plenty of work to be done. Hopefully I can make up for lost time now I've finally made it here!

Sammu. I'm glad you asked! My one time Managerial rival has plummeted down the pecking order and now resides with lowly Wealdstone. I would say I'd miss our brief rivalry but it's safe to say it was rather one-sided...and humiliating.

Cheers Matt! I was rather pleased myself!

---

Bradford Park Avenue. It's been...an experience.

With my time at the club seemingly bouncing from frustration to frustration it's been easy to forget that this has actually been one of my most successful spells at a club...

...That's not exactly saying much however.

Non the less Bradford's second team have finally waved me off to the Promised land.


2022/23
National League

Having made the gamble to leap from a growing Torquay to a Park Avenue side knocking on the door for promotion, my mid-season move very nearly blew up in my face as I introduced myself to the new club by almost instantly blowing their title hopes out the water, whilst only narrowly scraping my way to a disappointing place in the play-offs. Instant Impact.


2023/24
National League

It's safe to say the League wasn't exactly my main focus this season. With the club managing to barrel its way to the FA Trophy, my growing side managed to still hold their heads high in the League as we once again snuck our way into the play-offs before quickly being dumped back out of the running for another season in the National League. At least I got a trophy?


2024/25
National League

Having failed to make any impact at all in the playoffs in my previous two seasons with the club, my final run with the club see's me leave Park Avenue for once very much in the running to grab that all important automatic promotion spot. With the club finally firing on all cylinders I could still very well see Park Avenue next season in the Football League. You're welcome.

_______


Two play-off finishes, One FA Trophy and the club now battling for automatic promotion.

What do I even have to complain about?

...Money and for once it's not even my own.

Having joined the club with arguably the biggest budgets in Non League Football, I was able to craft a dream squad as I paid out wages Three times as much of my League rivals, with only a FA Trophy and a rapidly emptying Club Balance to show for it.

Ironically for a Managerial Mercenary I'm apparently useless with money...

​

 

[DerbyJack]

The Promised Land awaits.

Having floundered my way through a rather calamitous spell in Non-League football, I finally get my big break with one of London's oldest clubs, Barnet.

Throughout the clubs long history, The Bees have struggled to make a real impact in the Football League with the majority of the clubs success coming in the shape of National League titles as they yo-yo precariously on the edge of League football.

Time to add some stability to the Hive...

...It counts.

With Barnet only just able to stump up One Hundred Pounds a week more then my former Non-League employers, it's not exactly a rampant charge up the standings but with a season and a half to prove myself there's plenty of time to make a name for myself in the Capital....

Safe...for now.

Mid-way through the season and perennial stragglers Barnet are actually enjoying a dull but welcome spell in mid-table with the club currently enjoying a spirited Three match unbeaten run to ensure I make a promising start to life in League Two.

With only mid-table football the target for the Club, it's simply a case of maintaining the clubs current standing until for the second half of the season.

Good job i have such a strong record of making a positive impact from the get go...

Non the less with the Football League finally ahead of me, I can't wait to get stuck in.

New League. New me.

​

 

[DerbyJack]

Before I gleefully charge into League action, there's enough time to cast a look at the squad assembled in The Hive.

With the Bee's looking to distance themselves from an all too familiar Relegation dog-fight, this squad is going to have to keep up their already impressive run of form...

Solid. Unremarkable but solid.

With the entire squad proving to be capable of holding their own that this level, the team on face value appears to be well up to the task already but their are some rather alarming signs in this seasoned line-up.

It's rather top heavy. Like a Nineties glamour model the club has way too much upfront with very little creativity throughout.

Seven strikers and just Three central midfielders. Certainly some business to be done.

As I filter through a myriad of Loanees, there's still certainly a number of strong players...

Twenty year old Right back, John Morton is hands down the most promising player in the Barnet squad. At just Twenty Years old the solid full-back is already enjoying a memorable season with the Bees, his impressive defensive attributes and solid all round physical abilities ensure he's one of the first names on the team-sheet....that and he's my only right back.

Club Captain and one of the only midfielders in the team. Storie is crucial. The Scottish ball winner is pivotal to my chances of making the right kind of impact in the League. Having been a key-stone in Barnet's squad for nearly seven years the all-rounder will be called upon to guide this loan-backed squad to reach their best. I'll be watching.



I'll take it.

Thankfully with my first move into League action I've not been hamstrung by a lackluster line-up.

Having said that, with little to show in the middle of the field, my usual Four-Four-Two formation is going to be well out the window as I quickly look to establish a tactic capable of making the most out of Barnet's rather lop-sided line-up.

Having rarely strayed from my ever reliable formation, it's going to be an interesting start.

Time to unleash a tactical masterclass...

​

 

[DerbyJack]

December 2024​

Before a ball is even kicked, I quickly attend to matters off the field.

With plenty of time wasted and the football managerial education of someone who once accidentally watched a game of football, there is only one thing on my mind.

Progress...

...Well this is familiar.

I might have finally made it to the Football League but it seems some things never change.

With the club nearly half a million pounds in debt before I've even been able to make any kind of impact, my attempts to take quick advantage of my new found managerial status are soon squashed.

Guess it's back to doing this the hard way...

_______

26th December 2024
EFL League Two

This Football League malarkey is easy isn't it?

With both clubs currently enjoying life in mid-table it seemed both sides were keen to just see out the game and settle for a point. Thankfully these Bee's have a sting in their tale... Putting that cringy line a-side, my new found squad do me proud as they strike in the last few seconds of the game to stun the home crowd. Instant impact.


28th December 2024
EFL League Two

With a rather risky Four-Two-Four formation playing dividends in my first game at the helm of Barnet, I carry it on to the next game for a solid if rather unconvincing draw with Gillingham. Despite my tactical prowess essentially boiling down to merely bypassing the middle of the field, the squad manages to claim another hard-earned point for their tally.


December 2024
EFL League Two

With my first taste of League football now out of the way, I've already made some strong progress. Not League progress. But some kind of progress non-the-less. With a less then convincing unbeaten streak narrowly maintained and the club proving to be better then expected despite my hap-hazard tactics, I'm poised to make an instant impact in English football.

Brace yourselves.


​

 

[DerbyJack]

Two games into my spell with Barnet and I'm already tinkering with the squad.

The January transfer window swings around already and despite barely getting to know the players by name, I already have big plans for Barnet's seemingly misshapen team line-up.

Time for some Spring cleaning...

In quick succession I unload four players from the squad as the deadwood is soon sent packing.

Strikers, Junior Morias and El Bakhtaoui are both sent packing on New Years Day with MK Dons and Lincoln taking the two veteran forwards out of the Capital.

With two of the clubs numerous strikers sent packing, the next two permanent departures came from the other end of the pitch as Goalkeeping duo, Craig Baker and Luke Malcolm are both snapped up having never made an appearance for the Bees at all.

A smooth Forty Thousand in the bank...All we need to do now is sell the rest of the squad and I might be able to afford a Coaching badge.

From: Burnley​

Cost: Loan - End of Season​

First signing of my time in the Football isn't quite the landmark signing as we bring in loan signing, Jake Fenwick. At just Nineteen Years Old the central midfielder arrives with a deal of developing still to be done but none the less the promising Burnley youngster could prove invaluable in our thin central midfield.

From: Stoke City​

Cost: Loan - End of Season​

Copy. Paste.

Much like Fenwick, Stoke City's young prospect, Sean Elvidge makes his way to the club as he looks to bolster his opportunities with the Potters. With a clinical eye for a pass and solid all round abilities the Twenty One year old will provide some stiff competition for a starting role in our two man central-midfield.



So. I have a confession.

I scouted preciously no-one in this window.

Signing the two central midfielders with the highest value on the market we thankfully ended up with two players actually capable of playing at this level, whilst I concentrated on unloading from the clubs already frugal wage budget as I look to boost the clubs lowly finances.

I guess that worked out nicely?

​