The Football Managing Mercenary

[DerbyJack]

It was indeed a something Matt!

Cheers Brooksey, feel I might have been a little late on this one!

Indeed I did Patrick! Every little helps. Cheers!

Thanks so much TicTactition, Really appreciate it. Fingers crossed there will be plenty more to come! Hope the new job is going well?

I like the optimism Battman! From Barnet to Barcelona in no time!

Cheers Sammu! It certainly did feel good to go from crisis talks to promotion. At least they made so ammends with the coaching badges!

So did I Neavie. Never in doubt. I'm waiting for a League Two club to offer me a higher wage and drag me back down!

---

Whilst I manage to inadvertently bumble my way out of League Two and one step closer to the Big Time, the men at the top aren't quite worrying themselves with the imminent arrival of a rapidly raising manager from the depths of English football.

Instead it's an all too familiar face that has caused quite the stir...

​

Massimiliano Allegri	Carlo Ancelotti	Jose Mourinhio
Real Madrid	Manchester United	Manchester City
£155,000 per week	£96,000 per week	£95,000 per week

The Special One has returned.

Having been almost untouchable at the helm of United, Jose's commits the ultimate betrayal as he re-enters English football and the top earners listing at the helm of Manchester City.

With Allegri dominating with the Citizens, it wasn't long until the sleeping giants, Real Madrid came a knocking as the once all conquering Spaniards look to bring an end to the recent English dominance with an Italian seemingly blessed with a Golden Touch.

Meanwhile managing to hold on to his place at Old Trafford, Carlo Ancelotti replaces the departing Diego Simeone in second place, with a respectable FA Cup victory at least getting his United tenure off to a winning start.

Whilst the top earners get used to their new position in the pecking order, I've got an entirely new League to get used to...

Derby Jack

Barnet

£1,700 per week

I'm getting there.

Slowly.

With the clubs unexpected promotion I do manage to scoop a small wage raise as I creep my way up to One Thousand and Seven Hundred pounds per week.

Whilst an extra Two Hundred pounds a week will hardly be noticed by the likes of Allegri and Ancelotti it is at least another step forward in my now rapidly raising career.

Glory awaits!



​

 

[DerbyJack]

Nine Years and I'm finally on a roll.

With my career very much on an unexpected upward climb, it's the perfect time to take a brief glance at how the rest of the footballing world is shaping up.

As always any queries about your own clubs or anything else for that matter just ask.


2025/26
Premier League

Allegri bows out of Manchester with City still very much the dominant force in the League. For Arsenal and Liverpool they finally see their European credentials tested with the emergence of two new contenders but the real pain comes at the other end of the table with instant returns to the Championship for Reading and Bournemouth with an unfortunate Bristol City joining them.


2025/26
Championship

In the Championship both Brentford and West Brom secure automatic promotion for another instant shot at life in the top flight, with a patient Fulham finally bringing Premier League football to Craven Cottage. For Forest, Blackburn and Cardiff that can only look longingly on as they drift further away from their glory days in the top-flight.


2025/26
League One

Clearly sensing the arrival of a new dominant force in the ferociously competitive League One, Hull, Bolton and Plymouth all wisely climb their way to safety for a season in the Championship. Meanwhile it's a miserable season for Notts County, Cheltenham, MK Dons and Dagenham & Redbridge as they slide back down to the fringes of English football.


2025/26
League Two

Wrexham dominate their way into League One with Accrington and an extremely fortunate Barnet clinging on to their coat-tails for an unexpected promotion. Chesterfield continue to pile the misery onto Carlisle as they once again miss out on promotion by the narrowest of margins but the real sob-story comes in the shape of a crest-fallen Charlton as they crash their way out of the Football League altogether.


2025/26
Europa League

The English era of dominance is instantly broken as Arsenal and Chelsea are quickly knocked out of the running leaving Porto and Leverkusen to pummel their way to the final. The former Champions League winners return a European Trophy to Portugal with a convincing display in the Veltins-Arena.


2025/26
Champions League

France has finally arisen but perhaps not in the shape we expected. Despite the vast riches of Paris St Germain still very much drawing some of the best players in the world to the French capital it actually falls to the long slumbering Marseille to put French football at the top of the standing with a convincing victory over Real.


2026
World Cup

Football has come home!

The Mexican World Cup ironically bears witness to European dominance as England, Spain, France and Germany duke to reclaim the Trophy. A thrilling final between England and their ever impressive rivals Germany see's The Three Lions emerge on top with the long-serving Gareth Southgate lifting the first trophy of his career.


​

 

[Raaritsgozilla]

Great result for England! Any familiar faces left in there?

 

[Sammuthegreat]

Crikey. Marseille lift the Champions League and England win the World Cup - that'll be the day!

Out of interest, where are Wolves? With all their money I kinda assume they'll end up established in the top flight (that's certainly what I expect in real life given how we're smashing the Championship to pieces) but I've not noticed them in the relegation/promotion mentions so have they lapsed back into mid-table in the Chumpo again?

 

[DerbyJack]

One day we might witness it ourselves?! Other then Southgate himself, it's mainly a team built around Spurs brightest prospects with Dele Alli, Harry Winks and obviously Harry Kane being the core of the World Cup winning team.

Indeed it will Sammu was quite nice to see Marseille pip PSG to the post though? Even though I am supposed to be supporting the money grabbing teams! Wolves did indeed make it to the Premier League at the first time of asking and have been battling admirably to stay their ever since. Bizarrely Steve McManaman is currently keeping the Wolves afloat.

---

Whilst I hastily try to convince myself that I deserved to make it into League One, I patiently await a bumper budget from a jubilant Barnet board...

...needless to say It didn't come.

With a token gesture in the Transfer kitty and a measly Four Thousand pounds added to the wage budget its not exactly going to be a ground breaking transfer window for the Bees.

With the squad assured that I would be keeping the faith with the majority of the first team thanks to our limited budgets there is just two permanent departures throughout the club as we bid farewell to two of our Reserve players who failed to feature for the first team at all.

Despite only clearing out two players who had little to no impact upon the squad itself, I still had plenty of work to do as I look to fill in the holes left from our departing five loanees.

Time to rapidly form a League One team I guess...

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

First arrival of the season see's me snap up a permanent back-up striker for the budding strike partnership of Innes and Cameron in the shape of Matt Gould. The Twenty Year Old has suffered a frustrating Four years with Stoke City and will be eager to make the most of his opportunities with the Bees.

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

Gary Jackson proved to be more then capable of running the shot down the right hand flank in our hugely impressive promotion season but with the rigors of League One fast approaching former Chelsea youth product, Dan Allen will provide a more then capable back-up with his blistering pace alone.

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

In my desperation to assemble a squad capable of mixing it up with some former Premier League giants, I made some rather desperate moves in the window. Unfortunately Michael Wilson represents that perfectly. One sloppy scout report and a quick-fire contract later and we end up with a disappointing back-up keeper.

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

Having mainly brought in inexperienced youngsters I make the probably wise decision to at least sprinkle on some experience with the arrival of first-choice left-back, Macaulay Gillesphey. Having played in League One throughout the majority of his career the convincing defender will be looking to round off a solid career with the League's new boys.

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

Another suspect scout report and we end up with the entirely disappointing Luke Comer. With almost my entire defence being formed by on-loan players last season I was keen to quickly form a permanent back line before the start of the season. Unfortunately in my haste it seems I signed a defender far off the level of League One.

From: Out of Contract​

Cost: Free​

Much like Gillesphey, Dan Matsuzaka arrives into the club having held a first-team spot with fellow League One side, Southport for nearly a decade. With solid defensive abilities and the jumping reach of a Salmon, the experienced central defender will be our solid foundation from the back.

From: Chelsea​

Cost: Loan - End of Season​

With my attempts to sign up defenders to permanent contracts not exactly resulting in the most impressive of back-lines, I opt to make a return to the loan market and the ever reliable Josh Smith. Having impressed last season with the Bee's we will be hoping the Chelsea youngster can continue his impressive development with the club.



I'm going to be honest.

This doesn't exactly bode well.

With a squad still very much resembling a side that didn't expect to be promoted to League One and a handful of new additions that seem to be worryingly suited to our level, it has the potential to be an ugly season at The Hive.

Brace yourselves...


​

 

[DerbyJack]

Preseason 2026

It's safe to say the transfer window didn't exactly build much confidence throughout the Barnet faithful.

Thankfully I have one advantage over the rest of the League.

I'm a tactical genius.

I call this fortune changing formation "The Lazy I"...

...Mainly because it vaguely resembles the letter "I"....

...but more because it has literally no instructions or effort involved in it what so ever.

Despite forming a rather risky Four-Two-Four formation and putting precisely no effort into crafting any form of tactical master-plan somehow it has transformed my rather sloppy career.

Having tried my utmost to craft a tactic from the ground up, it seems I've finally stumbled upon one that works by essentially unleashing my highly trained Bees and flooding the defences of the opposition.

Hopes are high it can continue to make an impact once more in League One.

_______

11th July 2026
Friendly

Our first game of the season has us smash our way past the Football Leagues most recent casualty. Charlton Athletic. Having spiralled out of the Football League altogether the crest-fallen Addicks and the now barren Valley Stadium will bare witness to Non-League football for the for-seeable future. Football can be brutal at times.


16th July 2026
Friendly

We continue to rule the roost over our Non-League opposition as we make our way past Boreham Wood. The home side managed to hold our rampant attacks at bay almost to the half time whistle until new arrival Dan Allen broke the deadlock with an encouraging solo effort from the right wing. Maybe we do have enough strength in depth this season...


18th July 2026
Friendly

...But then again. A trip back to our former League Two opposition has us pick up a worrying loss at the hands of the Gills. Midfield general Danny Killock pegged the home side back following their shock opener but it seemed our former League rivals refuse to let us believe in our League One credentials as they pick up a last minute winner.


21st July 2026
Friendly

Just when doubt began to creep into the squad, they quickly restore the faith with a surprise victory over Championship outfit, Reading. The Royals arrived at The Hive looking to try and improve their own more following their recent relegation from the Premiership but our Scottish sharpshooter Innes Cameron saw fit to pile on the misery to the down-trodden visitors.


1st August 2026
Friendly

We round off the pre-season just as we started it by picking up a victory over a lowly Non-League side. Like a school bully we make the most out of picking on smaller opposition to head into a potentially challenging season with our heads held high. I feel a bit like I'm leading lambs to the slaughter...

...at least they're happy about it I suppose.


​

 

[ninjaskill]

Good luck in the heady heights of League one football, I'm sure it will be simple for a tactical genius

 

[Brane_Orsou]

Now you've discovered the lazy I League One will be a stroll in the park!

 

[DerbyJack]

Cheers Ninja, Obviously I will try to restrain my tactical nuance...and ego.

Keep the faith Neavie! Honestly could be the most bare-bones tactic I've ever created...but it works.​

---

August 2026

8th August 2026
EFL League One

This League One malarkey is easy isn't it?

​

Making the most of our surprise arrival in the League we quickly set about showcasing our credentials with a deserved victory over Oldham. A nervous crowd gathered in the Hive expecting the worst but in a performance that would come to define our opening month of season the boys defied expectation to secure an early Three points.


12th August 2026
ELF Cup - 1st Round

If our Opening day victory wasn't surprising enough an unexpected passage into the second round of the League Cup certainly was. Championship outfit Norwich have been knocking on the door for a place back in the Premier League but a humbling and convincing defeat to the Bee's certainly left the Canaries rattled.


15th August 2026
EFL League One

Back to the League and the boys once again defy expectations. With the club firmly rejecting their pre-season status of relegation candidates they once again push themselves to the opposite end of the table with another narrow victory this time over a hapless Bradford. With the points already rolling in, it already seems we are well set to take this League by surprise.


22nd August 2026
EFL League One

With new arrival Matt Gould lighting up the League following his arrival to the club the old boys quickly return to the fray to continue our stunning winning streak as the unflappable Lloyd Neal and Zimbabwean winger Benyu both combine together to stun a visiting AFC Wimbledon. We're quickly wracking up the names at this dizzying high.


25th August 2026
EFL Cup - 2nd Round

Okay. Whats Happening.

With the club in the midst of a dominant run of form, they continue to pick up scalps, this time stunning Premier League stalwarts, Brighton. The Sea-gulls gifted us a two goal lead by the break with the in-form Lloyd Neal quickly shutting down the top-flight side with a third goal proving enough to keep Rio Ferdinand's men at bay.


29th August 2026
EFL League One

The squad finally show signs that they have not become footballing immortals as they are held by recently relegated Burton. The Brewers are keen to make their way back into the Championship but were nearly added to the list of clubs the Bee's have stung until a desperate last minute equaliser finally pegged back the biggest surprise package in the League.


August 2026
EFL League One

I'm not used to this.

Truth be told this is truly unexpected. With the squad very much still strung together by a group of players that only just managed to squeeze their way into the promotion spot last season, I was braced for a brutal introduction to life in League One but it seems my buoyant squad refuse to be taken lightly as they smash their way to the top of the table

I'll be taking that. I'm not entirely sure what I've done to deserve it other then keeping the faith with my promotion winning squad but non the less a debut award gets our League One tenure under-way in the finest of fashions. I can only hope to wrack up more before the League finally begins to take us seriously.


​

 

[Raaritsgozilla]

A **** of a start, we could be seeing back to back promotions!!

 

[Brane_Orsou]

OMG WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! Have you made some sort of deal with the football manager gods swapping instant success for your soul?

 

[TheBattman]

this is wholly unexpected

 

[Sammuthegreat]

Ha!!

 

[DerbyJack]

​

I could certainly do with the shortcut to the top Raar!

Just a mild goat sacrifice Neavie! I honestly don't know what's happening but I'm going to do my best to pretend its intentional.

Indeed it is Battman!

Sums it up perfectly Sammu!

---

September 2026

1st September 2026
EFL Trophy - Group P

Well there goes the unbeaten streak. Thankfully the boys save their worst performance of the season thus far for a competition that quite frankly is merely an added inconvenience to what would prove to be a month already filled to the brim with matches. Despite that the convincing Three goal defeat was certainly a rather large wake up call for the Bees...


5th September 2026
EFL League One

...Not that they cared. Having lead the way as League Two Champions, Wrexham have been firmly left in our wake as we show them just how to introduce yourself to a new League. An emphatic opening half an hour of football saw the boys punish some wobbly defending to wrap up another Three points and a return to winning-ways before the break.


9th September 2026
EFL League One

...and we're back to losing. Despite the convincing victory over Wrexham the boys are unable to maintain their unbeaten streak in the League as Luton Town narrowly steal the victory. The Hive was once an impenetrable fortress for the Bee's but with two defeats in a row at Home we can only hope the boys rally quickly.


12th September 2026
EFL League One

Back on the road and back to winning ways once more. The increasingly impressive Matt Gould has made the most of his opportunities following a set of niggling injuries to our usual strike partnership of Neal and Cameron and another clinical brace keeps the youngster name firmly in the running to break into the starting eleven.


15th September 2026
EFL League One

Oh Cardiff. Remember when you were a Premier League side? The Blue-birds stay in the Championship came to a crashing end last season as they plummeted into League One and it seems the Welsh side are set to spiral yet further into the mire as a crushing four goal thrashing continues to pile the misery onto a near empty Cardiff Stadium.


19th September 2026
EFL League One

We bring the winning streak back to the Hive as we manage to overcome the once giant Coventry City. Having been on the back foot for nearly the entire first-half we manage to limit the Sky Blues to just one goal before the boys thankfully turn up the heat to overcome the one-goal deficit courtesy of the in-form Gould and a towering Josh Smith header.


23rd September 2026
EFL Cup - 3rd Rnd

Our League Cup adventure comes to a long-awaited end as our run is brought to a close by Premier League new-boys Fulham. The Cottagers made sure to not fall victim to a Barnet side seemingly more then comfortable with punching above their weight as they hold us to a narrow one-goal defeat. Non the less another impressive display from the Bees.


26th September 2026
EFL League One

Back to the League and its a battling draw that continues to keep the Bee's picking up what could prove to be vital points in the long run. With the Millers and their impressive striker, Glen McAuley smashing in a brace of goals in a frantic four minute spell, the boys once again refused to go down without a fight with Danny Killock leveling the game late on.


30th September 2026
EFL League One

Oh that felt good! Having gone two goals behind to Forest it appeared my impressive run of games was about to come to an abrupt end in the most humiliating of fashions until the boys entered the second-half in stunning style. A Rikki Vine reply and a wonderfully late brace from Matt Goulds saw us claim all Three points in the best way possible.


September 2026
EFL League One

We're not coming down.

Despite the boys suffering their first defeat of the season they remain stubbornly rooted to the top of the table. With the actual promotion contenders starting to slowly gather behind us it seems we're going to be in for a fierce fight to remain here but non-the less it's been another impressive month for the high-flying Bees.


​

 

[TheLuckDuck]

15th September 2026
EFL League One

Oh Cardiff. Remember when you were a Premier League side? The Blue-birds stay in the Championship came to a crashing end last season as they plummeted into League One and it seems the Welsh side are set to spiral yet further into the mire as a crushing four goal thrashing continues to pile the misery onto a near empty Cardiff Stadium.​

:'(

 

[DerbyJack]

I feel your pain LuckDuck, the mighty Rams also slugged it out in League One for some time!​

---

October 2026

3rd October 2026
EFL League One

With club finding itself very much in unfamiliar territory an early red-card see's the club's table topping credentials firmly tested against a determined Southend. Despite being reduced down to ten-men the boys only let one goal slip through their resilient back-line, with the defensive brick-wall himself, Josh Smith leveling things late on to cap a find display from the back four.


6th October 2026
EFL Trophy - Group P

With very little will and even less instruction the boys head into a match-up against League Two's Billericay back in the Football League Trophy. In a game were both sides seemed to be entirely devoid of motivation it was no surprise to reach the final whistle without a single goal for either side with the Bees eventually claiming the win via the lottery of penalties. At least we're off the mark?


10th October 2026
EFL League One

Innes Cameron's blisteringly quick goal got the Bees off to a thunderous start against Bristol Rovers but the Gas proved to be more then up for the fight with their continued pressing eventually resulting in a deserved equaliser just ten minutes into the second-half. Some dogged defending saw the boys cling on to an all important point.


17th October 2026
EFL League One

Did our bubble just burst?

Our unbeaten streak has quickly turned into a win-less streak with a title chasing Bury brutally reminding us of our status in the League with a Five goal thrashing condemning us to our third game without a win. Despite my team being taken apart almost single-handedly by on-loan teenager winger, Jake Baxter, I've somehow managed to impress the right people...

21st October 2026
EFL League One

Free-fall? What fee-fall?

The boys instantly set about making amends for their crushing defeat in the last game with a convincing victory of their own over lowly Walsall. A Four minute opener from ever impressive right-winger Gary Jackson got us off to the perfect start with club stalwarts, Storie and Adebayo both making rare appearances to join him on the score-sheet but apparently it wasn't enough to impress my short-term suitors...

24th October 2026
EFL League One

Blackburn Rovers seem to have finally had enough of languishing in the depths of League One and with a reformed squad and club legend Tim Sherwood now at the helm, the former Premier League winners finally look set to make a step back towards their long forgotten glories. Despite the lofty status a thrilling come back saw us hold onto a hard-earned point.


31st October 2026
EFL League One

A five goal white-wash at the hands of Bury might have been a kick in the teeth but if anything a narrow defeat at the hands of a lowly Ebbsfleet sent much louder alarm bells ringing throughout the home faithful. Pegged as being our fellow relegation candidates at the start of the season, the narrow loss sends an unwelcome reminder of our true belonging in the League.


October 2026
EFL League One

Well, it was fun whilst it lasted.

Despite struggling to just one League victory this month, the boys somehow managed to cling on to a still impressive Third place. Quite frankly I would be thrilled with just a top half finish this year and with the rest of the League seemingly unwilling to set the early pace, we might just be able to pull it off.


​

 

[Matt G]

YOu are still on course for back to back promotions. That's a trick I pulled in FM06 but it is definitely easier said than done.

 

[TheBattman]

as long as it doesn't go **** up I can see you leaving by the end of the season, especially as the new qualifications come in!

 

[The GallantPioneer1872]

Classsssss, Can't believe your doing well XD

 

[DerbyJack]

Don't think I've ever achieved it before Matt! Can only hope our bubble doesn't burst too soon!

Hope so Battman, I keep splashing the CV around far and wide now that I've actually got some coaching badges but not quite drawing any convincing interest thus far!

Nor can I Gallant! I'm trying not to change anything to avoid breaking my good fortune!​

---

November 2026

7th November 2026
FA Cup - 1st Rnd

With our League One credentials very much under review we take a break from the pressure at the top of the table for a brief break into the FA Cup. Unfortunately the cup competition gave the boys no room to relax as they narrowly avoid a potential upset against non-league Stockport following a deflating goal-less draw. Non the less it seems my name has finally spread to the upper reaches of Scotland...

10th November 2026
EFL Trophy - Group P

Despite paying very little attention to the competition we make our way into the next round of the competition as we knock Brighton's young prospects out of the competition courtesy of a three goal demolition job. A goal a piece from our trio of influential players proves to be more then enough to bag a rather lackluster spot in the knock-out stages.


14th November 2026
EFL League One

We make a brief return back to the all important League action as we play-out a thrilling tie against Colchester. With both teams trading goals right the way up to the final whistle, the impressive efforts of Neal saw his dominant hat-trick drag the team to another impressive three-points. Unfortunately however it wasn't enough to impress my Scottish suitors...

18th November 2026
FA Cup - 1st Rnd Replay

The FA Cup. Who needs it?

Well. I did for one. With the chance to take a scalp against one of the Premier League's best further down the line, we fall flat on our faces at the first hurdle as we crash out to a plucky Stockport. With the boys seemingly unwilling to continue their impressive cup form for one more competition the Non-League side deservedly progress.


21st November 2026
EFL League One

We continue to fall well short of our early season best as we are comfortably put away by Wigan. The former Premier League side and FA Cup winners are a long way away from their former heights but despite long languishing in the depths of League One they still managed to impress with a convincing and dominant come-back snatching the points.


25th November 2026
EFL League One

We continue to drop points at a worryingly rate as we hand Crewe all Three points. In a nervy game between two sides vying it our to cling on to the play-off race, both sides waited till late in the Second-half to turn on the style with Neals instant reply being cruelly cancelled out to make it three losses in a row. Apparently that's all Danish heavyweights FC Midtylland needed to see...

28th November 2026
EFL League One

With my name surprisingly in the running for a job with the Danish top-flight contenders and Europa League regulars, Midjtylland the boys do me a massive favour as they bring our short losing streak to a much welcome end. Chesterfield snuck into the League along side us last season but a clinical Cameron hat-trick highlighted the contrasting fortunes between the two clubs.


November 2026
EFL League One

Does no one want to go up?

Despite the club being reminded of their lowly status through-out the entire month they somehow manage to cling on to their still lofty, Third place. With just two points distancing us from the current leaders, Blackburn belief still flows throughout Barnet as the clubs honey-moon period looks set for a lengthy extension.


November 2026
EFL Trophy - Group P

Yeah. This happened. I can't pretend to be excited by the prospect of being sent packing from the competition by a Premier Leagues exciting youth-side but non the less I suppose I should be pleased to at least progress to the next stage of the competition for the first-time? That's something right?


​